When I got home and opened Garo's notebook, I came across a lot of personal entries just as I expected. Okay, Anne Frank. I decided to read the very first one to get the gist of what I was getting myself into.
May 3, 2019
Church highlights! I saw the pastor's daughter giving head to Sam Geller after the mass. Looks like he will be doing all my assignments for a while.
"Fuck." I mouthed, letting out a laugh and then skipping to the most recent entry.
Mar 5, 2022
I like him so much but I never get to talk to him because of Chloe. She's the bane of my existence and it's not like she isn't aware of anything, she knows exactly what she's doing. Once I pull this one thread she's been hanging onto for so long, this will all be over.
I scrunched my forehead. What the fuck? I foolishly flipped further but there was nothing. That indeed was the last entry. Garo was clearly good at exaggerating but I really wanted to know what she had on Chloe.
I flipped back to read the previous entries. A lot of them mentioned Chloe and how annoying she was to her but they were all just mindless rants. Garo's diary was a way for her to take her anger out and for the most part, it was quite hilarious.
There was, surprisingly, no mention of the guy she liked anywhere else. I wouldn't have cared about her little crush but Chloe, allegedly, ruining her chances of being with this dude worried me a bit.
Well, it worried me a lot.
I knew Chloe since we were ten. I knew I liked her when we were thirteen. She shared her lunch with me when this huge jock snatched away my lunch money and made fun of my name. Sounds silly but I had no one rooting for me except her for a long time in my life.
I knew I was in love with her in junior year but letting her know wasn't the type of risk I was willing to take. Everything was going just fine and for a while, I didn't take it into consideration that she might be interested in other guys. But reading Garo's diary brought that fear back and with full force.
I kept telling myself that Garo Lewis couldn't have been a reliable source but, again, it wasn't like Chloe was super open with me about her personal life either. I mean, I knew her family and she knew mine but we barely talked about stuff that mattered. Sometimes it felt like I only knew the Chloe I met when I was ten.
I looked at my phone. There was this strange urge in me to inform her about the diary. I picked up my phone and then put it down almost immediately. Sad. All of this was so fucking sad. I knew she'd naturally pay more attention to me if I told her about the diary. An ugly pink diary added more value to what I had to offer in Chloe's eyes and it made me so angry.
I hid the notebook in my pillowcase and threw myself back on the bed. I guess I have to talk to Garo after all, was my last thought before my eyes closed involuntarily.
"Where the fuck are you, Lewis?" I muttered to myself as I stood near the school gate, fiddling with my lighter.
I had ignored all of Chloe's texts that morning just so I could keep my mouth shut. The thing was, I was hopelessly in love with Chloe Maxwell and that prevented me from keeping things from her. I confided in her regarding everything and she was well aware of that. Distancing myself was a form of protection. Besides, I was on a mission. The path was blurry but I knew something might materialise if I dared to tread on that path enough.
I moved to a corner of the school lawn and lit up a cigarette out of boredom. My eyes were glued to the gate. A moment or two later, I finally saw Garo. For some reason, I didn't walk up to her, and thought that calling her name from across the lawn like a creep would be a better option. I only realised how weird it was when I saw her stop in her tracks and look around.
She tilted her head, looking directly at me before saying something to her friends and then making her way towards me. None of us said anything for what felt like an eternity. "Are you going to speak or were you just catcalling?"
"Um, I'm Sair." I wanted to slit my throat. I really wasn't prepared. I had no idea where I was going to go conversation-wise when I called for her.
She gave me a funny look before letting out a laugh. "Okay." Silence. "Can I?" She pointed at my cigarette and I wiped my free hand on my jeans before handing it to her. To my dismay, she threw it on the ground and stomped on it. "I don't like the smell."
"Ihaveyourdiary." I spoke quickly.
"What?"
"Your diary." I gulped. "I have it."
"Oh." She crossed her arms across her chest. "Well, hand it over."
"It's at my place." I told her. "I couldn't help but read that entry about Chloe." For once it felt like the conversation was going somewhere.
"I've written about her a lot." She admitted. There wasn't a hint of nervousness in her tone or body language. "What are you referring to?"
"The last entry where you mentioned a guy you were into." Her lips parted, there was a tinge of tension on her face. "I wanna know who that is."
"None of your business." She scowled at me.
"No no no, I'm not—" I sighed. "I don't care who you like. I'm just asking because I like Chloe." I had never said it out loud before. It strangely felt good.
"I don't care." She said, flipping her braids off her shoulders. "I just want my diary right now."
"Well, too bad." Her eyes widened. "I'm not giving it to you unless you tell me who that guy is." I surprised myself. Blackmailing the most popular girl in school first thing in the morning wasn't exactly on my schedule for the day.
"What would you even do once you find out about the guy? Ask him to stop?" She laughed.
"I'm just...I just wanna know and then you'll get your diary."
"How about we strike a deal?" I waited for her to continue. "I'll tell you who the guy is and I'll keep him away from Chloe only if you help keep Chloe away too?"
"How?" I scrunched my forehead.
"You know the usual. A little misunderstanding here, a little misunderstanding there." She looked at me expectantly. "So?"
"Okay." I shrugged. I wasn't sure if any of it was going to work but trying never hurt nobody. "You'll get your diary after it's done."
"Wait. No!" She stepped closer, a frustrated look on her face.
"If your plan works you'll have your diary and the guy whose name I still don't know." I smiled. "Let's get on with it, starting today."
"Fine." She huffed. "Levi."
"What?"
"Levi Lind. The guy I like." I didn't know anyone by that name but then again, I barely knew anyone at school.
Another white boy. I sighed.
"You'll have to show me...your guy."
"I'll show you my guy if you promise to keep your girl away from my guy." With that she began walking away. "Meet me by the bleachers. Lunch time!" She said loudly before disappearing into the school building.