My heart pounded so badly in those moments out of anxiety and fear. So much I fear it would leap out. So much I fear it might cease beating. All I knew was the figure hurriedly approaching. The burning of free will like a consumed wick minutes away from triggering a detonation. Like a death trap on my fate as a woman.
"So, you are the one they sent. I am rather furious, being ambushed by strangers and injected with a drug. But since you offered yourself up to me, how can I refuse? Athaliah."
His words reverberated in my mind. And yet, I am so lost, so confused, the capacity to rationally think left my body. It feels as though I am the one debilitated and not him. I could only pray in my heart and turn around at the last second, quickly running for my survival, when a hand caught me from behind.
I scream on the inside as his breath tickled down my neck, a deep uncertainty of what was going to occur. Here, out of all places. Him, out of all people? My body began to quiver before tears began to fall. A deep instinctive fear manifesting at its largest.
"Reap me and you will regret it all your life." As though sensing the tremble rampaging in me, the rapid desire to run away, this man embraces me tighter. In his arms, a yearning for my body to stay nestled against his, a claim that'll last forever. "Would you allow stupidity to smite your honor, a woman to curse on your soul?"
I kept so many words at the tip of my tongue. One threat after another, not even thinking about explaining how this entire thing is just one large coincidence called fate. I can't count the number of times I called out to God. Yet, the arms holding me didn't loosen. Snaking around my waist and tender neck.
Time feels like an eternity. I want to yell out in that instance, but the thought of what people would think had they found me in such a compromised situation left me paralyzed. 'Speak Athaliah! Speak!' But the words didn't come. I am left dry in the throat, one horrendous scream lodged in my throat.
"You dishonor me too much, Athaliah," I try not to notice the utter disappointment lacing his surprisingly languid voice, the head drooping on my shoulders keeping tension in my body," There is a time for everything. When I claim you, it will not be amidst the garden nor eyes of spectators. You are mine and mine only. No one can see you that way. No one."
Abruptly, I am squeezed tight. As though he is afraid of me leaving. A bone-crushing desperation clutches at my torso, yet it remains to be the least of my concerns. There is no shield of civility in this abrupt imprisonment. My legs at the brink of collapse. All I knew was that I am entirely at his mercy at that moment.
Wordlessly, I stretch out my mouth, consoling the syllables to form themselves. To say something witty, threatening, pleading, life-saving. Anything at all that would wrestle me out of that situation. "What honor should be given to a man who demands responsibility due to an accident? You are wholly mad for thinking I in any way would give myself to a man I do not know."
The grip circling me loosened, and I for a second think I would be released for a moment before I am enclosed once more. Whatever conscience overcame him is devoured by his selfishness. The man raises his head from my shoulders, and the slight brush against my ears as he whispered into it sent a tingling feeling down my spine.
"You will come to know me. To the point, you get sick of it. To the point, you want to erase it. I will ensure of it. Athaliah." The words uttered were know, yet it felt like he is demanding love. In a world where no one truly can understand another person, I do not understand why is he asking for this fallacy. "But the responsibility I ask of you is much lighter than that. Whatever they injected to me is dangerous. Be a wise lady and lead me to the water fountain, will you?"
As soon as the slightest chance of being saved showed itself, I immediately nods and answer his request. Dragging him by hand towards the water fountain near the rose bushes where I was just earlier with prince Blaise. Just a different sky, a different man, yet such diverse emotions.
The scent of roses tickled my senses in such a way it would almost be romantic. A perfect rendezvous with the beams of moonlight falling down on the two of us. Yet we are just two distressed people clinging their way to survival. With everything but the thought of affectionate emotions in our minds.
Out of nowhere, the man begin undressing his ankle-length cloak brusquely without consideration and even more incredulously drapes it around me. Something that my hateful body was glad for in this cold weather. With his overly warm body temperature sticking on my skin through the cloak. I try to not breathe in the remainder of his calming, virile scent, a woody fragrance reminiscent of the nature I love.
By the time he started stripping himself of his doublet, and chemise I bury myself entirely in the safe confines of his cloak. One eye covered by the fur and the other peeking through my fingers. I try to convince myself it is solely based on the urge to be in the know of what is happening. And not the magnetic pull of his sculpted chest and abdomen.
"I have done as you asked. My debt is repaid." I convey from within a safe distance for fear of what I may end up seeing in the following minutes. To what extent would this man strip himself naked In front of an unmarried young lady? "Pardon me of my mistake and I will forget your insolence unto me. Nothing occurred today."
The man was leisurely enough to dip into the cold waters of the fountain which must've felt tremendously frigid under this weather. As we've long passed the mid of October. Yet, there was no hesitancy in his movements, nor any trepidation that I would leave. I would've been deceived had I not known of the way his hands reached out for me. As if I was his whole world at once. As if he would lose himself along with me.
An odd feeling considering how I've only met him today.
The only thing he had to do was send me a stare. Though I couldn't see the emotions hiding in it under the darkness of the night, I could sense the threat slumbering within. And yet there is something much more wretched rooting me in place. An emotion I couldn't quite place in the absolutely cataclysmic reaction of our encounter.
"And run away with my cloak? I'm afraid the entire court would assume a rather scandalous story seeing you arrive in it." The mysterious man speaks in a manner that seemed to border between a scoff and gentle chiding, "I have to say, I'm rather pleased with how quickly you become attached to a part of me."
Shame fills me in that instance. The hand pressing the cloak tight against my body fell in front of my stomach. It just feels so easy being around him, maybe because I fret so much I stopped worrying entirely. Maybe because he sees deeper than all the others. Maybe because he doesn't know me at all.
I approach the fountain, sitting next to it before trying to drape the cloak on the edges when I am glared at by completely irate eyes. The plan to drop the clothing there and abscond vanished from my mind sooner than it appeared. From this distance, I could see how equanimous he actually was despite this situation.
By the time I started taking in the undisturbed tranquility, and the joyful music in the air, the scene of the man next to me, hugging himself brought the temperature to my attention. In no way should a man be in the waters during such cold weather. Even in the spite, I held for him, I could not help but possess concern.
Looking in his direction, I notice how he is slowly unresponsive, during that moment, my hands accidentally touches the water and shivered under the sensation. Out of unwarranted curiosity, I call out only to be ignored, then daringly went to check his temperature when I realize something odd. He feels cool to the touch.
"Excuse me, my lord, Your Highness, however, I should address you as, are you alright?"