I shift my weight from one foot to the other. I've been standing in line for hours and my feet feel like they're on fire. I got here at 5am thinking I'd make it before most people but by the time I got here there were already about fifty people and by the looks of it some look like they slept here. I was tempted to go to the front pretending to know the girl at the front but thought better of it. Last time I pulled that stunt I ended up at the back of the line. Imagine that. I was so mad. But then again you can't blame a girl for trying.
We're here to audition for a chance to be a presenter on a teen show that will be airing on TV in a few weeks. Of course I'm no teen but with this outfit and my 5.3 height one might mistake me for one. I'm 23 but believe me when I say I've been hit on by sixteen year olds more times than I can count. This should work to my advantage.
I've been going audition after audition for the last two years now but nothing solid has come out of it. All I got were small parts like being an extra in a TV series or commercials. I've also been on a few music videos five to be exact but that's about it. The only reason I haven't given up is because I've always wanted to be an actress since forever. I did a lot of plays back when I was still in school and people always pointed out how good I was. I totally agree with them. What can I say I'm Hollywood material.
"Oh my word. I think those guys that just got here are checking us out. And they are cute aaahhhh" the teenage girl standing next to me squeals in excitement.
"They are aren't they" I do my best not to sound bored.
She's been doing this since she got here and if she doesn't shut up right now. I'm getting exhausted pretending to be excited about guys that aren't even checking us out. To my relief my phone starts ringing and the caller ID says 'Mom'
"Hey mom" I greet her cheerfully.
I love talking to my mom before going through an audition because her voice somehow eases my nerves. I'm grateful that my parents are supportive of my dream. They don't pressure me to find a real job because they understand that this has always been my dream growing up.
I didn't really tell mom about this audition so this call is sort of unexpected. I don't think I stand a chance against these teens who only want this part just for fun unlike me who takes this seriously. I'm hoping somebody might discover me even in some teen show and I would finally get my big break.
"Hey honey. How are you doing" she asks in that sweet calm voice of hers.
"I'm fine mom. How you and dad doing?" I walk away from the chatty teens for privacy.
"We're fine..." she pauses and I hear her letting out a heavy sigh before she continues, "...so how are the auditions going, you got any this week?"
Something sounds off about her. I have a feeling that something might be wrong.
"Mom what's wrong?" I have to ask.
My heart starts racing as my mind is making up ridiculously crazy scenarios on what could be the matter.
"Oh honey, I didn't want to worry you but your father got retrenched a few months back and we thought he might find another job soon but nothing has come up yet"
What? And she's only telling me now.
"...the stress is eating him up. You know how much he loved his job. He's not himself lately" she adds.
My dad has worked for that stupid company for years and the thanks he gets for being loyal is getting retrenched.
What in the world is wrong with these people.
"I'll be home a little later. See you later mom" I tell her as we say our goodbyes and hang up.
They'll be more auditions in the future, right now my family needs me. I leave the line and make my way to my apartment which is a few blocks from were the audition is being held.
When I get to my parents, dad is happy to see me and the guilt of not coming to see them for months starts eating at me. I can tell he's not okay. He's lost some weight, his hair is even greyish, bags under his eyes from lake of sleep and mom isn't any better. The sight of my parents looking this way breaks my heart in a million pieces. I want to cry but right now crying wouldn't solve a thing.
"Claire Nichole" daddy smiles broadly when he sees me.
"Hey dad" I give my old man a tight hug.
After hugging my mom longer than necessary we sit down and catch up.
"Why aren't you at work daddy?" I ask even though I already know.
I want to hear it from the horse's mouth.
"Oh I thought to take a day off and spend some time with your mother" forcing a smile he glances at my mom who keeps a straight face.
Shaking her head my mom leaves the room. She hates it when my dad won't ask for help when he clearly needs it.
"Can I please have your car keys. I need to head to the grocery store for some ingredients. I saw this recipe I want to try" I stretch out my hand.
"Oh i-it's at the- I mean one of the guys borrowed it"
"Will you stop making a fool of yourself. She already knows. Goodness" I hear my mom groan from the kitchen. That shuts him up.
Looks like they sold my dad's BMW which was the latest model. What a shame that car was gorgeous.
I decide right then that it's time to put my dream on hold and get a real job.
***
A week later and I still haven't gotten a job. Sure I've gotten a couple of calls but I guess I wasn't what they were looking for. Oh well too bad for them. They should be thankful I even applied. I'm gonna be famous one day and they'll wish they'd given me a job. My parents are doing their best not to panic but it's hard not to when my dad can't find a job either.
That Sunday, the three of us go to church as my parents have done since I was only but a little girl. I feel awkward as the members seem to know me while I barely remember any of them. The only people I do remember are my mom's friends and their kids whom I used to play with growing up but they don't count. It's been years since I've been here and right now I feel like an outcast.
I think I feel better after the service and while everyone mingles outside, I'm standing next to my mom's car impatiently waiting for my parents to be done socializing with the other members when Pastor Kain approaches me.
"Claire. How are you dear" he greets smiling at me.
"Pastor Kain. Hi"
"Haven't seen you in a while..." and by for a while he means three years "...your mother told me you were pursuing a career in acting. How is that going for you?"
Of course my mother would tell Pastor Kain about my career even if it's almost non-existant. How embarrassing.
"Haven't gotten any permanent jobs and right now I'm putting that on hold. I'm currently looking for a real job" I tell him honestly not meeting his eye.
I'm blushing right now even though I know Pastor Kain wouldn't judge me.
"What kind of jobs are you looking into?" he asks politely.
"I'm not really choosey, anything would do"
I know I sound desperate but that's because I am. I know Pastor Kain knows in detail what my family is going through because my mother is very open when it comes to our business.
"Well in that case, I have a friend of a friend of mine who is a businessman looking for a secretary and I think you're a good candidate since you did business studies in college"
"Really?" my ears peck up.
"Yes, but I'll have to call him and ask if he still hasn't found a replacement yet then get back to you. You might learn a thing or two from him"
Him? Relax Claire. He's not some monster from a horror movie or anything like that.
I'm so excited right now. I hope whoever the guy is hasn't found a replacement yet. I hug Pastor Kain then go through the crowd in search of my parents to share the good news with them. I should probably not share the news just yet but I believe this job is mine. That is what Pastor Kain was preaching about during the service.
This job would make our lives a little better and I just pray that Mr Businessman hires me.