I couldn't guess where we were going but I had an inkling that it was going to be a long drive. I will never understand men and their madness for exhaustive road trips. I turned the radio on, pulled the seat back, and laid back on it while the breeze brushed us from all sides. Except for the scarf running across my neck, everything seemed like in a movie.
Slowly, we drove toward East Sussex and crossed the Thames over a long white bridge which Noel pointed to as the Dartford Crossing. The weather turned windier as we kept driving and darker clouds were hovering above us at high speed. The red brick buildings started to fade into plain pastures and tracks of trees that wore their most vibrant hues. I took in the fresh calm air that smelled of Earth and home. The warmth of nature was matched by the melodious music I began to play on my phone.
"The trees look beautiful," I said.
"Wait till you see where we're going"
"Can you please tell me where we're going? It's been an hour already"
"I thought you loved a nice surprise"
"I do. But I'm too curious to wait"
"We're halfway there. Just wait a little bit longer"
"Noel" I called turning at him.
"Hmm," he raised his eyebrows shifting his sight between the road and me.
"Is this a date?"
"Do you want it to be?"
Maybe I did. Maybe I didn't. I couldn't follow my own heart. "I just want to know what to expect"
"I know I'm keeping too much suspense but trust me on this. And if you want to label what we are, I don't have a word for it yet. Maybe, we'll figure it out by the end of the day"
I nodded. He was being too mysterious and wouldn't let slip anything. Anyway, who doesn't love a nice mystery to solve?
I pulled my shades from the bag, turned the volume up, and hummed to 'Teenage Dream' and most of my adolescent pop playlist until I could see the shoreline in the distance.
Soon, we found a parking space only a few meters away from the sands that invited us. By the look of it, it wasn't much crowded. Maybe it was off-season. As I jumped out of my seat to stretch my limbs, he walked to the back of the car and pulled out a small camper from the boot.
There was no way he had prepared all of this in one hour. He must have planned it well in advance but how? How did he know I'd agree to come? Maybe he planned to go on a trip anyway and he just took me along. Or maybe it's not any of this. Who knew what ran in his strange mind?
I wanted to ask him but I knew he was not going to answer. He had planned something and he wanted to unveil it himself. So, I just followed him toward the beach.
I swiftly took off my shoes and grabbed the hamper from him so he could take off his. I saw people still wearing shoes and walking on the sand but for us, it was a huge crime not to walk barefoot. I still remember the first time walking on a beach with my little feet sinking with every step into the loose hot sand, while my father held me around my shoulder padding my moves. Beaches reminded me of home and childhood. It takes me back to a time when it was just the four of us planning an entire day around the beach - my mom packing the food and my dad arranging the drive. I was reminded of home and how much I missed them. I would do anything to walk on the beach - just the four of us running and giggling. Was it too much to ask?
I didn't know that my eyes teared up until Noel held my wrist. He grabbed the hamper with his other hand and walked me through the sand and gravel.
Once we found a place to sit, I had a good look at the water in front of me. It was no different from the beaches back home, but the reflection of the golden sky paired with dark clouds bouncing off the pristine waters was simply too beautiful to take my eyes off them. There was a new feeling inside me - something I haven't had in a long time. I wanted to lean on his shoulder and let the stubborn tears flow away. I wanted to cry out in his arms while he looks into my eyes and brush my hair away from my face. But, I couldn't.
"Anu" he interrupted my thoughts."I know things are really strange between us now and I'm sorry. I know I can't take back what I said"
I looked at him intently trying to take in every word carefully.
"Everything I said was the truth. I shouldn't have done that but I was angry and I freaked out"
"I always knew this anger was going to consume you"
"I don't like what I've become"
I didn't know how to respond. "I know you're not this person"
"No. But it's a part of me"
"Noel. I know you. I know what you've been through, what your father did to you. It was my fault for leaving you all at once. I'm sorry for that. But now you just need help to recover. You could try Therapy" I suggested.
"You think I haven't tried? My therapist tells me that I need to work on resolving my feelings from the past"
"Hmm. And that includes me?"
"Not includes you. Just you"
"What do you mean?"
"He said that I needed closure, that I still have some feelings that were stopping me from moving on. That it was disturbing every other relationship of mine"
"So taking me on a date is going to help you resolve them?"
"Yes. I mean no. That is not why I brought you here today"
"Then why did you bring me here today?"
"Because I felt sorry for my actions. Because I wanted to apologize"
"You could have done that in London. Why did you have to bring me all the way here?"
"The same reason you followed me all the way here," he said gently placing his hands on mine.
That wicked man was right again. I followed him without question or resistance. Though I was baffled by his invitation and confused about whether to trust him or not, I didn't take a step back in travelling all the way along with him to a strange land.
"Why are we really here Noel? Don't dodge my questions"
"Alright. I'll tell you", he said throwing his hands back and leaning on them. "I've been in London for a few years now and travel had become a part of me. Whenever I find two days spare, I borrow a car and drive off to a new place I haven't explored. Camber Sands was the first beach I visited solo and it instantly reminded me of you. I could only think of all those times we skipped classes and spent time in Bessy holding hands. However I resisted keeping you away from my mind, and you returned. But, soon you stopped coming and these places felt empty without the memories of you to fill me in. I only dreamed that you'd be back in my arms while I walked through these sands. I haven't come back here since then"
"Noel, I thought you moved on"
"You know what! Let's not talk about this anymore. We'll start fresh and act like adults. What do you say?"
"That's a convincing proposition". Of course, he was repeating my own words to me.
"Amazing!" he clapped his hands in joy. He then rolled around and pulled out a bottle of sparkly. "A toast to new friendship?" he asked.
"Sure, why not?" I grabbed the glasses from inside the basket and sipped the wine tastefully as we spoke of the good old days. However hard we tried, we couldn't drift off from talking about our past. But this time, we stuck to the good parts.
Then, we drove into Rye to grab something to eat. I have always wanted to explore England for my fascination with castles and huge gardens. I still remember gaping at Hogwarts castle when I first saw the Harry Potter movie. I cannot remember the number of Potter marathons we did back then. While he was disinterested at first, I hyped it so much to invest him further into the books, and eventually, he won trivia over me. Since then England has remained a special place for both of us.
As we walked across the tiny cobbled streets of the town, I was mindblown by the beauty of the houses that stood on both sides with whitewashed walls and tendrils wrapping over them. The vibrant market lanes and antique shops took me in with a warm welcome. We walked around the serene town chuckling and piggybacking while exploring the history of the town from the locals.
For a while, I felt like a carefree teenager who only wishes to spend a few more minutes in bliss. I wasn't a teenager with a curfew anymore, but I was still worried about this moment ending. If only every day was full of joy and endless happiness, I would stop running. I've gotten used to running but only I knew there was no end.
"Do you want some pictures for your Instagram?"
"Yes!" I jumped up in excitement.
We walked to the famous Mermaid street which resembled the picturesque photos of white houses with trailing ivy on its walls and cobblestones filling the gaps. Who doesn't want a picture-perfect moment?
I handed him my phone and posed for a few photos while a couple waited for us to finish the angle. Immediately, they offered to take a picture of us both and we nervously agreed. I could sense mixed emotions in both of us. He came closer to me and threw his arms around me. It wasn't a big gesture but we were starting to feel like friends - just like we planned.
We walked along the narrow roads taking in the serenity of the beautiful coastal town that was filled with the sea breeze. We had not checked our phones until we observed the pink sky setting upon us. The day was coming to an end and this might be the last time I saw him.
"Had fun today?"
I nodded beaming brightly. "It was definitely not a date" I chuckled.
"You know, I'll miss this"
"Me too," he said putting both his hands into his pockets.
"Will you come to India again?"
"I am. My wedding is in two months"
"Oh!" Why was I surprised? Just because I forgot that he was engaged for a few hours doesn't mean he wasn't. "Will you invite me?" I asked poking my tongue out.
He smiled nervously and turned away. I could see from the side of his face that he wanted to say something but he was struggling.
"Do you want to say something?"
He briskly turned back to me. "I can't thank you enough for trusting me and spending the day with me. I feel so much lighter now"
"No! Thank you for bringing me to this place. I wouldn't have had a weekend better than this. I was about to spend the day in the hotel spa, you know"
"Is that it?"
"Mm-hmm" I had a funny feeling. "Why do you ask?"
"Nothing", he smiled and turned away.
We started walking back to the car that we had parked a few streets away. The sky was getting darker by the minute and the occasional thunders urged us to leave soon. We picked up our speed but to our vain, the showers fell in full speed. I quickly ran into a little cafe on the side and took out my phone to check the forecast. Strong winds and rain was predicted for the next few hours and we looked at each other wondering what to do next.
"I think we will have to spend the night here", he said blushing.