"I will really shave that girl's hair when we meet! The thickness of her face is so terrible, I'm gonna kill her!" My mother couldn't calm down after she found out what happened to me earlier at school.
"Fortunately, the doctor said that your baby is in good condition, Chanty. They said you only had minor bleeding because of your body's reaction to bumping into a hard object, but the important thing is that you didn't miscarry the baby, dear."
"Why not?" A bitter smile tugged at my lips. "I hope the child just fell from my womb after the accident earlier, Ma. That would be my chance to get rid of people insulting me, right?"
"Chanty-"
"Aunt? I'll be the one to talk to her first," said Lucas.
As Lucas asked my mother, even though my mum's eyes showed that she didn't want to leave me inside, she immediately walked away from me and left the room. Now only Lucas and I were left inside.
"No matter how much you hate the father of the baby you are carrying, that should not be a reason for you to hate the child as well. He is not to blame for what you are going through right now. Stop thinking he's unlucky, because for others... Having a baby is a blessing, Chanty."
"Can it be called a blessing if they're using this baby just to make me look a loser and a dirty woman, Lucas?" I sat down and with my knees together, I bowed. "I used to feel that my classmates were only treating me humanly, so they could copy my assignments or ask for an answer in exams and quizzes. But after breaking the issue about myself being a rape victim, I felt more and more that in the section I belong to, I felt more and more alone."
Tears poured down my eyes. I was no longer able to stop myself from being weak despite my stubbornness not to show to any of them that I was going to cry again about the complicated things I had gone through… that I thought... because of the marriage setup that my parents and Lucas made... can solve the issue.
"Do you mind changing schools? For a fresh start?"
I looked up at Lucas, I laughed at the same time. "Do you think I'll be happy again when I move to a new school? Does changing my school guarantee me to have true friends this time? How can you be so sure of that?"
"Maybe if you move... to an environment where no one knows about your issue... there's a high chance that they will accept you fully-"
"It also came from your mouth that people can't accept me all because of the issue I had." I laughed out loud. "That issue is close to my name, Lucas. There's no possible way that people nowadays, who've been a citizen of the internet, wouldn't have any idea how dirty I was."
"Stop saying you're dirty. You're not-"
"I am. I was!" I went back to lying down and turned my back on Lucas. "Just leave me alone. I don't want to talk to any of you as of now."
"Chanty-"
"Please…"
Just a long sigh all I heard from Lucas. Afterwards, I heard the room door open and close. When I was sure that I was the only person inside, I covered myself with a blanket... and under the blanket, I let myself cry harder.
—
I don't even want to go to school, but I have to. I have fully recovered even though I can't deny that this first month of my pregnancy was very difficult for me. I went through so much stress that often led me to minor bleeding or spotting.
"Let me taste yours, Queenie and Chanty."
Our Cookery teacher pleaded with us, so I immediately gave her a spoon and fork while Queenie held the creamy fettuccine pasta we made. I'm a bit nervous about Ma'am Veron's face, meanwhile I remember that before Queenie and I started plating, we made sure that the balance of the sauce that we were going to put on the pasta was just right.
"The sauce is a bit salty," said the teacher. "Also, the pasta is raw. Did you two follow my rules that cooking the pasta should be around 10-15 minutes?"
"Yes," answered Queenie. "Chanty was assigned to cook the pasta while I was assigned to the pasta sauce. We made sure the pasta was cooked right and the sauce tasted just right-"
"Are you saying I have a taste problem, Queenie?"
Queenie bowed and shook her head. "I'm sorry, Ma'am."
"You should take another try at cooking this recipe until you perfect it. If you fail, you two will fail my class."
I feel like my world has collapsed after hearing what Ma'am Veron told us. We will not definitely be able to attend our other classes until we meet the standard of our Cookery teacher.
"Are you sure you cooked the pasta properly?"
"Yes. You even saw I close-watching the cooking of pasta earlier, didn't you? I have a timer-"
"But why did Ma'am say it raw?"
"Well, how about your sauce?" I hissed. "You told me that you were confident that the pasta sauce mixture would be delicious, right? What happened now? Why is it salty?"
"So, you want us to repent here?" Queenie raised an eyebrow at me. "If only I didn't need a partner or my friends didn't leave me, do you think I would have put up with you as a partner? I hope I'll be the only one doing this activity, so I won't end up getting stress like this anymore!"
I was the one who walked out because of Queenie's tongue twister. I was very hurt by what she said to me. At the very beginning, I knew that she was forced to accept me as her partner. Who would want to be paired with someone like me, anyway?
"Great job!"
I was about to enter the restroom to wash up and wake myself up to reality, but I saw Monica at the door. So, I just peeked outside, so I could listen to what they were talking about there.
"It looks like those idiots didn't notice that we changed the plate they were going to use in the presentation, didn't they? We've made this plan succeed since Chanty is made to cook creamy fettuccine again, eh!"
My blood suddenly warmed. It seems that Monica will never get tired of sabotaging me.