River: Hi? Can we please talk? I feel really awful about last night.
I have been staring at the text since the moment my phone pinged at it's arrival almost three hours ago.
It is now eleven in the morning and I have not gathered enough strength to text back.
Thinking about last night has me torn. On one side I feel very pathetic for letting River convince me to let it go and give him a chance to fix things. I feel like by giving him this chance it makes him think that he can test any of my limits and expect me to give him a chance to fix it later on.
On the other side I feel very guilty for getting mad at him because some evil part of me liked it when he acknowledged that something had happened between us before I left. It is more than he ever did when we slept together and the bubble of joy and hope that grows inside me worries me a little.
But then again, don't these two just make me pathetic?
This is why I'm afraid of letting River back into my life.
