My eyes opened to see only darkness. It was so dark that my eyes might as well've stayed shut. Anytime I blinked, I could feel it, but I saw no change. I couldn't even see my body, but I could feel it. I could feel that I was standing in this stygian space. I turned around to see if I could find anything. No matter where I looked, I saw nothing to orient myself. Eventually, a certain level of fear and claustrophobia built up inside me. With zero visibility, there might as well've been a wall centimeters from my face or an infinitely open space. Either way, I didn't feel safe. After a while, I decided to run. At least if I ran into something, I would've found something. At first, I ran cautiously just in case I did. But after a while of not running into anything, I sped up. Eventually, I was in a full sprint, running as fast as I could. The longer I ran, the more obvious it became that the ground was perfectly flat. There were no dents, holes, bumps, inclines—nothing. Just a flat, cold, and hard ground. After sprinting for three minutes straight, I stopped to catch my breath. Bending over with both hands resting on my knees, I gradually slowed my breath to adjust back to a physically calmed state.
Once my breath reached a calmer pace, I heard a high-pitched, wooden creak followed by the sound of a closing door behind me. I immediately turned around to see a wooden door standing in the open space attached to nothing. It was illuminated by light sources somewhere on the other side of it. With my only other option being complete darkness, I walked to the door, gingerly opened it in case there was something dangerous on the other side. I immediately felt the warmth of the indoors I never noticed was missing. The door opened up to a hallway of wooden walls, floor, and ceiling that broke off in a T at the end. A few sconces on the walls gave off all the light needed to see everything clearly. I entered slowly, still afraid that something bad would happen. Something dawned on me that this hallway felt familiar. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something about it made me feel like I'd been here before. As soon as I felt this odd familiarity, the door behind me slammed shut on its own.
"What in the hels!" I turned around to see the door was no longer there.
All of a sudden, this place that felt warm and inviting started to feel suspicious and concerning. Seconds later, I heard a person screaming and running behind me. I turned around to just barely see a small spark of flame right by the end of the hallway on the right turn of the T. Concerned about what I heard and saw, I quickly and cautiously walked to the end of the hallway to peek around the corner. I saw nothing to the right beyond more hallway and a few doors. Hearing crackling down the left hall, I turned my head to the sound to see the entire hallway on fire. All of a sudden, I was hearing screams coming from there. Without a single thought, I rushed to the edge of the fire hoping that I could do something to help. I stretched my arms forward, put the backs of my hands against each other, then swung my arms outward parting the fire so I could run forward. I rushed through the space to the first door I could reach. When I got there, I noticed it was just a doorway and the door was kicked open into the room. I entered it to immediately see little Foz reaching out to me with a pitchfork through his back, pinning him to the floor.
"H-help . . . me . . . Red…"
Just as he finished, his hand and head fell limp on the floor. I looked away to the left just for a second to the source of the scream. It was Jankub pinned to the wall by blades burning, though he wasn't screaming anymore. Seeing that made me stumble back until I tripped over something, causing me to fall on my rear. I looked at the object to see Rory's head rolling away on the ground. Thoroughly mortified, I crawled back as fast as I could until I bumped into something soft. As soon as I did, I felt a cold liquid as if I sat in a puddle. I stood up immediately at the shockingly wet, cold feeling just to turn around and see Fin on his side in a pool of blood lifelessly holding his gut. Seeing all of this made me stumble sideways until I reached a bunk bed I could use to support myself. After a moment, regaining my balance, I noticed a sound barely peeking past the roaring inferno. It was a soft whimpering mixed with a painfully held-back need to burst out crying. Although it was quiet, it stuck out like a sore thumb. Why do I know this sound? With my attention taken away from the massacre, I walked around the bunk to the middle walkway of the room and continued to walk past all the bunks, stepping past a bruised, bloodied, and broken Mosz. I kept walking until I reached a familiar bunk tucked away in the right corner with a blanket hanging over the side. As soon as I reached it, I suddenly heard the sound of a girl screaming outside the building. My attention was quickly taken away until I heard a terrified and urgent voice I recognised.
"What if they're all dead? What if any of them are still alive? What could I do?"
Turning my eyes back to the bunk, I approached it even closer. Kneeling down so I could see under it, I lifted the blanket. Out of everything I saw, none of it filled me with as much terror as what was under the bunk. It was myself as a kid rocking in the fetal position, terrified beyond belief, trying to figure out what to do. Suddenly, the rocking stopped and his head slowly opened up to see me.
I watch his terror-filled face turn to cold confusion just before saying in a voice deeper than even Abraxas's while still holding my own, "What are you doing here? You shouldn't be here. You're wasting time! You need to sa—"
Suddenly my eyes opened as I shot up in my bed, once again seeing the cabin, instead of the nightmare, as I caught my breath. Except this time, I had a terrible headache and my body felt even more restless than usual. Without even thinking, I forced myself up, put on my pants, and walked to my window. I opened it to see Abraxas's worried eye patiently waiting to see me. Except this time, it didn't jolt me.
"Another bad dream, young Ladon?"
"Yes."
"Was it the same one?"
"Yes. Kind of? No. It was different. Same massacre."
"I see… It's never changed before, has it?"
"No. It's always the same."
"Curious. If you do not mind, I would like to talk about this dream over breakfast, young Ladon. This is indeed a curious happening."
"Alright."
Feeling more confused than horrified about what the younger me said, I grabbed the last of my leftovers and pondered his words on my way outside. How did he know me? What was he going to say? Who was that screaming girl? Was he talking about her? When I stepped outside, my eyes got blasted by the sun as if daylight was enough to blind me. I used my right hand to block out the sun while they struggled to adjust.
"Considering you just achieved magic yesterday and you probably slept badly, it is not surprising that you should feel this way this afternoon."
"How do you know what I'm feeling?"
"It is written all over your face. I can practically see your headache."
"I see," I said before shoving food into my mouth.
"You have had the same nightmare almost every night since we met. Something must have changed for it to change as well."
"I learned how to control fire."
"Hmm… I suppose that's true. However, I doubt that had much to do with it. But I suppose it is hard to know for certain. There is only one thing that can give us answers to our questions. Tell me about your dream, young Ladon. Let us decipher it together."
And so I spent the better part of an hour telling him everything that happened. The darkness, the door, the massacre, the scream, and myself. I spared no detail of this nightmare.
"I am sorry you went through that, young Ladon. But I must say, this is truly fascinating."
"It's alright. I really just want to know why it happened. I wasn't prepared for that . . . experience."
"Yes. Of course. I do have some ideas about your dream. First, I must ask you a few questions. Who do you think that screaming girl was?"
"I don't know. All I know is I heard it in the real massacre too."
"I see. Do you recognise the voice?"
"Well, yeah, but I can't remember who had it. There were a lot of girls in that orphanage."
"I understand. Clearly, it must mean something to you. Otherwise, I doubt it would be so prevalent. Maybe it will come to you in the future. What do you think the younger you was going to say?"
"I'm not sure. Maybe save? But then who would I be saving?"
"Right. Because he wanted you to leave. He even thought you were wasting time. So clearly, I don't think he wanted you to save anyone there. Maybe . . . maybe he wanted you to save yourself or save someone who was not there anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"Think about it. You have been tortured by this your whole life. Perhaps he is trying to tell you you need to save yourself from it; find a way to move on. Also, that screaming voice happened just before you saw your younger self, so maybe he might be telling you to save them. I am not sure about any of it, but I am sure we need to find a way to work past this trauma."
"I . . . I don't think you're wrong. I just . . . I don't know."
"It is okay, young Ladon. You only need to move at a comfortable pace. Do not stress yourself too much about it."
"Okay. How do I work on it?"
"I recommend working on fire for now. It will be a great help to you if you remove a fear that is attached to your trauma. Remember: you only need to move one step at a time."
"Okay."
"Now, I have one more question for you, young Ladon. Have you ever had a dream where you were in that darkness before?"
"No. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, it is probably nothing. I just had a suspicion."
"About what?"
"Something highly unlikely, and complicated, young Ladon. Should you have more dreams like this one, do let me know."
"Alright."
"Now, if my nose is not deceiving me, you need to collect more food, am I wrong?"
I let out a tired sigh. "I'll be back in a few hours."
"Very well, young Ladon."
I walked to my cabin. On my way, I saw my makeshift shortbow resting against the outside front wall alongside my makeshift quiver holding twenty arrows of a similar quality. I grabbed them and walked inside my cabin. I put on my shabby cloak hanging off the corner of my bed, and grabbed my dagger. Now ready, I exited my cabin and walked north into the forest.
I continued walking until I reached the river, then drank from its ever-refreshing water. I partially wondered whether or not, if I'd repeat the same steps, I'd feel the eyes again. I didn't, and couldn't complain about that. Unlike last time I was here, the forest was lively. Birds, bugs, and other kinds of wildlife filled the area along with the river. I heard a buck quietly grunting in the distance upriver. I turned to my right to both a doe and buck walking to the river, probably getting some water like I did. I swiftly walked back into the brush, following the river until I got close enough to the two deer. Using nature as my cover, I nocked an arrow, then drew my bow and held it, trying to ensure my aim was true. After a few seconds, certain my aim would drive an arrow through the doe's underside, into her heart, I released. Despite my efforts, the arrow flew away from her heart straight to her hind leg, causing the buck to run away and the doe to limp away as fast as it could. I tried firing another arrow, but it flew into the river. Knowing I couldn't let hergo now that she's been pierced, I chased after her through the woods for a while, avoiding every tree, jumping through every bush, and rushing through every low-hanging twig and web in my way. After enough time, the doe ran herself out of energy in need of rest. Once I reached her, she was already laying down. I pulled my dagger out of my cloak and slowly walked up to the doe.
"I'm sorry you had to suffer," I said mostly to lessen my own guilt. I put my hand on the deer and started petting her, hoping to give her some comfort. "May the lands beyond be better than your life here."
I quickly drove my dagger into her neck, as she let out one last quick yelp. Still hasn't gotten easier. Now with the doe dead, I put my knife away, lifted her over my shoulder, and stood up. Observing my surroundings, I realized I didn't keep track of where I was running.
"Fuck."
I closed my eyes and listened. I listened intently to everything I could: a few crickets beginning their song, the evening calls of various birds, and then, finally, the river. I traveled straight to it. After some time, I reached the river. It took me a short while to figure out what point of the river I began at. Once I did, it was easy to find my way home.
Once I entered the clearing, I saw Abraxas lying down in his nest. Just when I hoped I could be quiet enough to not interrupt his rest, he slowly turned his head toward me. "Ah, Ladon. It took you a little longer than normal."
"Had to chase it."
"I see. Someday, we need to get you a better bow."
"I doubt there's anyone near here. Even if there was, I doubt they'd have one to sell, not that I have any money."
"You would be surprised by what the world can give, young Ladon."
"Yeah yeah."
I brought the deer to the side of my cabin and skinned her, then hung her skin on my outer wall for later. Then I started carving out her meats: the neck, loin, ternderloin, ribs, legs, rump, and shoulders. I brought what was left of the deer to Abraxas to finish off. I never really enjoyed deer organs.
"Thank you for the snack, young Ladon. You know, you would make quite the butcher if you wanted to."
"I guess. Doubt they'd trust meat from a demidragon."
"That is true."
I walked back to my meat and cooked what I needed to eat, then used the smoldering fire to smoke a bunch of jerky. I put everything else in my small meat cellar below my cabin, then grabbed my dinner and walked outside to Abraxas. I looked up at the sky to see it was now night; the stars and moons shining amongst the clouds of color.
As I approached Abraxas, he spoke. "Are you sure you do not what to just eat and go to bed?"
"Not sure I want to sleep."
"I understand. What would you like to talk about, young Ladon?"
Now sitting down with my food, I said, "If it's alright with you, I'd like to hear about the original Ladon. It seems to me you two were close friends."
"Oh we were, young Ladon. He was my greatest friend. When we were young, probably in our mid-two-hundreds, we talked a lot. Shared our favorite foods to eat, stories, places to visit, and treasures. He was always a fighter through and through, and I was busy so we did not hang out very often. But throughout the centuries, our friendship remained. He was a very powerful dragon. Much bigger than myself. He had one-hundred heads."
I choked on my food from that last part. "One hundred?!"
"Oh yes, young Ladon."
"Did each of his heads have a different personality?"
"No. His mind was more of a collective of them all. Each of his heads knew everything every other head knew and sensed. They all followed one will."
"Wow. I didn't think that was possible."
"Somehow, it is. It was one of his features that made him so powerful. It's quite difficult to sneak up to someone who can see in one-hundred different directions at the same time. On top of that, each of his heads breathed fire in a different way and color. Many were a regular breath of fire, just in different colors. Many blew exploding fireballs. Many spat a liquid flame that could burn or melt anything it touched. Some couldn't exhale fire on their own, but could inhale fire just to send it back out. Beyond his heads, his body could produce fire under his scales, allowing him to cover his entire body in flames. On the battlefield, he was nigh unstoppable."
"And he's inside me?"
"Yes he is, young Ladon. It is quite a legacy, I know."
"And I can barely even use fire."
"Yes, and he had over nine centuries to master it. You, young Ladon, have only just begun tampering with fire. Do not beat yourself up over it."
"I see…" Sitting in silence for a few moments, I thought of what to say next. "H-how did he die?"
Abraxas's eyes slightly closed as his face sunk. "He led the dragons against the cull. I tried to convince him not to fight. I knew it was not going to end well. I knew he was strong, but there was no way for him to beat an army of dragons. In the final battle, just outside one of the last cities, he, alongside many other dragonkind, humans, and demidragons, fought them off with their lives. The humans and demidragons fought the armies of monsters and wyverns while the dragons fought each other. I do not know how he died for certain, or who killed him, but I do know he never returned from that battlefield. Seeing your soul proved to me he was dead. The culling dragons suffered such great loss during that battle that they retreated and considered their cull finished since they practically had the entire continent anyway. It was one of few losses they suffered. They were never able to get that city to this day . . . I think.
Trying to sound a little cheery, I said, "he must've put up quite the fight, huh?"
"I'm sure many went down before him. I just hope he did not suffer and was given an honorable death."
I almost couldn't believe what I heard about the original Ladon. He sounded like the greatest dragon there ever was. Thinking about him made me feel like I needed to live up to his impossible legacy. I mean, his soul's in mine. I was even named after him too. I wonder how other dragons would react to my name. I looked up at the sky to see the moon was almost reaching the midpoint of its journey. Realizing how late it was, I walked closer to Abraxas.
"Goodnight, Abraxas," I said while patting his massive nose.
"Goodnight, young Ladon. Try to get a good rest."
While walking away to my cabin, I waved my hand. "I will."