Lin
I'm parked in one of the corners of my nemeton in my throw, with Nyx and Erebus in my lap, listening to the sounds of a thunderstorm in the candlelight.
Storms are always a good omen.
Yesterday was uneventful, aside from me watching the wrestling pay per view with my neighbour that I was talking about.
As usual, I have mixed feelings on it.
Even with that, I enjoyed it overall.
It was entertaining.
I was very tired, so I didn't really write as much as I would have liked, but I did write a monologue for one of my side characters that I may perform as a POV once I can get a first draft written.
Yes, I'm considering becoming one of those POV YouTubers. No, I'm not apologetic.
I've always been a fairly good actor, given everything I've been through.
I mean, I had to pretend that my abusers were my parents. And I did get a B in my Drama GCSE, so I would say I'm not too bad.
There is one thing I worry about though, and that's being able to cry on cue.
I'm sure I'll figure that one out.
I'm excited though. It feels like soon, I'll get more customers, and my novel writing seems to be a sooner rather than later deal.
If I'm able to write chapters consistently, I may be able to get a deal with someone for my writing.
I can't wait for it to all come true, so I can pay off my debts and live without having to worry about everything.
Living with C-PTSD is tiring as it is, let alone trying to pretend to be human and having it, as well as attempting to do almost everything that humans do to be independent on your own.
I do have to admit though - I am lucky to be where I am now.
I have luck to thank for a lot of things, including my life.
As I type, I can hear a group of magpies chattering outside the nemeton.
I wonder if they're Celtic or Norse?
The first person who came to my mind, for some reason, was Loki.
Maybe he came to visit, though it's past the closing of the veil, so it's unlikely. If he's here, he's clowning me.
Just as I think this, a small wolf figurine appears on my altar in the nemeton, and I can't help but laugh.
It's clownery, your honour.
It's mockery, Your Grace.
I always felt there was a second line to that joke, but I couldn't quite reach into my memories to find it.
You're welcome.
Don't flatter yourself.
Kidding.
Don't beat yourself up, and I won't flatter myself. There.
*In parentheses, this is unlikely to happen, given that Lin is all too aware of themself.*
Allow that!
No. :)
I think I might need to give context to all of this.
Myself and Loki had been friends since before the Sim existed as we worked together before I srarted designing the Sim.
He's always been like a second brother to me.
The two of us were known for causing havoc, but also for being great artists and team players when put into the right environment.
That's why Mr Shadz chose us, until nopeman decided to kill him.
After that, nopeman and his lot tried to keep us far away from each other.
But we're both troublemakers, and most of our other close friends are as well.
Trying to rein us in will never work.
We're Gods, ever strengthening.
The magpies continue to cackle outside, so I rummage through my offering box for a response. I find a small goat statue.
He'll remember.
As I place it on the offering altar, it asports. Not too long after, a note appears on my altar.
"Not you clowning me"
I giggle.
You're welcome.