Chapter 260: Odd Memories (Part 2)
Shera Rigen's perspective
I don't know what to say about this exactly. I mean, it's about the headache that I got recently, the outcome has "opened" my mind a lot.
When I close my eyes and imagine those new memories, the things from them are so realistic to me. In there, I find myself to be a mother, having a little daughter named Eris. Moreover, John is my husband in those memories, how wonderful it is.
After going through more memories in my head, I got to know that they were memories of mine in the previous timeline. Somehow, after that terrible headache, those memories came to me. Now I've fathomed my husband's experiences in the past with me, from the good things to the bad things.
I had seen my daughter's death scene. That was very terrible to me, I had to kill myself to save my husband.
It's good when we are now having another future to restart everything. When I have a child with John, surely we will be a happy family.
"Mama... are you sleeping?". - All of sudden, a child's voice called me
"Mama...". "Mama mama mama, I must help Mama". - Then I heard footsteps going away from me
Now strangely feel a bit tired, I feel like I'm sitting somewhere. Feeling the oddness around me, I open my eyes and then... oh, seems like I've returned here again.
Somehow I've just got in those memories, although I'm not really sleeping. Now I wonder how long would this dream last, I hope it won't be long.
By the way, I will enjoy this dream until it ends.
Right now, I can see myself sitting on a couch. Some kind of green silk is placed on my thighs, and... seems like I was sewing some costumes.
Ohh... some thoughts have just come across me. These rolls of cloth are used to sew my husband's clothes for the incoming winter, hmmmm. Maybe I should put these things aside. Do it right away, I put those things inside a nearby blue rectangular box.
After doing the thing, I get off my couch, then start walking around. This house is made of stone, and this is Knight Rivia's house - from her ancestors to her time. According to these memories, John and I got to this place after the explosion during the summoning ceremony.
After getting there, we accidentally met up with Knight Rivia. She worked as a border Knight, guarding the wide southern border of the Demon Kingdom. This place usually has monsters showing up around, so she had to patrol and kill all of them.
Unfortunately, Rivia died for protecting me. My husband took her place and her house became ours after that tragic incident. This's a nice house.
I want to look around this house for more. Now I wonder where is my daughter, Eris should be here. Maybe she was the girl who called me earlier, my daughter found me sleeping.
She should be in the kitchen. Hmmm... maybe I should stay here till my daughter returns, I think so. I want to enjoy watching the bedroom of my husband and me... I love it.
It's sad when John isn't here with us now. He is now outside, patrolling around and killing monsters roaming around this stone house. Although feeling lonely, I understand my husband's issues when he has hard times staying with others.
He also has to hunt for food and kill monsters to protect our house too. I understand what he has to go through. However, I hope John would be back soon. I want to see all three members of the family appear in one dream.
Whenever this dream has my husband, my daughter is sleeping already. When there's my daughter, John isn't here with her and me. Sigh... so sad to experience that kind of thing.
"Mama mama...". - Surprisingly, my daughter came into the bedroom by passing through the curtain
"Mama, are you tired...?". - My little daughter is so cute. "Here's your water, Mama". - She handed me the water cup, I nodded to thank my daughter and took it
"Drinks... drinks... drinks...". "Thank you very much, Eris". - I returned the cup to my little daughter. "I'm sorry for focusing on my work, Eris... now mom will play with you". - I slowly headpatted my daughter, feeling ecstatic through doing that
"Hehe, mom... giggles". - My daughter's giggle when she gets patted is so cute!
Eris later runs outside of the bedroom to return the cup to the kitchen. Seeing my little daughter running to the kitchen, my mind starts fantasizing about many things. Hmmm... my daughter at this age is so cute and pretty like this... I wonder how would she be when she grows up.
She will be sure more pretty and cuter than her mother, that's what I think. However, now I wonder if I have a child like Eris in this timeline. Hmmm... that will be interesting, hehe. Especially when she grows up fully.
When my daughter finally finds her love interest, I will surely do everything in my reach to help her. Unlike me, now I feel so bad when my mother died so soon, she couldn't teach me any methods to have her love.
But unlike her, I will surely teach my daughter well with what I know. But maybe I should clear this kind of thought in my mind away.
Eris finally died in this timeline, my "first" daughter never had a chance to have her love. It's sad to know.
Thinking for too long, I stop it then realize that my daughter hasn't returned. Feeling a bit nervous, I come outside then head to the living room. Hmmm... little Eris can be seen tiptoeing. She looks out of the window with an excited expression, sure to be a lot.
"What do you need now, my dear daughter...?". - I came to her sneakily, then patted her head gently. "Mama will play with you, lemme teach you how to use a knife... for cooking... easy things first". - Yeah, that's how I will teach my daughter... doing house chores is also a way of playing
"Mama...". - Eris turned around, hugging me softly. "Can't Papa stay here with us even just for a day?". - My daughter looked up, feeling lonely when her father wasn't with her when she needs him. "I want to see Papa talking with me, I want to go outside with him...". - Done saying, my little daughter lowered her face, feeling so sad
"I know what you're feeling, Eris... come here". - I crouched down, then hugged little Eris. "You must understand your dad's issues, Eris... he loves you as I do, but he has problems with the outside things, so can't be with us".
"I will stay up late to wait for Papa home". "If Papa has problems, why doesn't he say to us...?". - It's quite complicated to answer it to you, my daughter
"Well...". - I stared at my little daughter, holding her shoulders, about to explain. "Your dad's scared that he will cause trouble to you, Eris... he wants you to be happy, not sad, you know?". "His... I mean his time when he was a child, he struggled to have friends, he didn't know how to express his emotions properly to people to understand".
"What is a "friend", Mama?". - Uhhh... no wonder when my daughter asked me that
"I'll explain it to you on another occasion". - Living in this forested place with the three of us, it's obvious for my daughter to not know what's friend
"I see Papa has so much trouble, Mama". "I want to help him, I want to make me feel happy too".
"Yeah... we'll sure do it someday, okay?". - Then I gently cuddled my daughter
When I am cuddling my daughter's face, I hear something. But I don't notice it much, my child's cuteness makes me want to lead her somewhere full of fun. Hmmm... eh? Why does Eris keep looking somewhere behind me for no reason?
"Papa is home". - Eh?
I look back, and see the house's front door is wide opened oddly. So I had just heard the door open previously. However, I just wonder who had come in. My daughter said my husband was the one who came in here but... I'm not so sure.
If that is John, he will surely close the door carefully.
I hear the ransack sounds in the bedroom. Just in case, maybe I should grab a knife.
"Oh...". - A figure came out of the bedroom and passed the curtain, it turned out to be my husband. "Oh, sorry when I didn't say anything, Shera". - John apologized, then opened up the cover and checked on his leather handbag slowly
"Papa...". - Eris came before John, calling him
"Hey, Eris...". - He just replied to our daughter, his eyes and his hands later just focused on his handbag
"You forgot something, John?".
"Yeah... or not really...". - John closed the cover of the handbag, then walked to the front door. "I returned to bring more water bags, now I need more for the slay".
"No, Papa... please stay here". - My daughter came to my husband, holding his sleeves forcefully. "Please stay here, play with me and Mama...". - She pulled her father away from the door
"Eris, I've got a job to do, don't disturb me". - My husband didn't do anything to stop my daughter, he just tiredly glanced at me. "Sigh... Shera, monsters are still out there, just tell our daughter to let me go out to patrol, please...".
"No no no! Papa, I won't let you go, Papa...!". - Stopped pulling John, my daughter grabbed his right leg and pressed her face on it. "Sobs... sobs... sobs... Papa, please". - She grabbed his leg tighter, sobbing at it
"Wait, you can't do that...". - John was surprised when I closed the door. "How can we be safe if no one goes out to clear those monsters...?".
"John, please...". - I approached my husband, then slowly hugged him. "Saying that but... I've seen you going out just to lie on the ground and set up campfires several times". "Sometimes you just stayed there, waiting for night comes to go home... you didn't go far to slay or hunt". - Hearing what I said, my husband flinched a little, as if he knew he was wrong at some point
"I know you have things you can't say, John...". - Then I hugged my husband tighter. "But you know...? I will be here to cure your pain... please have rest today".
John sighs after hearing what I said to him. He looks down to see his cute daughter. However, he doesn't pat our daughter although he always wants it so bad. John just stands there, and waits.
"Eris, Papa's decided to be at home all day today". - I announced it to my daughter, then headed to the kitchen
"Papa!!!". - Eris was so happy, she tiptoed and tried to hug her dad by doing that
John just clumsily holds his little daughter, then raises her to his chest. Eris immediately hugs her dad in happiness, the hug is full of love, softness and cuteness of a daughter. Maybe I don't need to do anything else. I will just observe the way this relationship progress gets progressed through time.
"Papa Papa, follow me...!". - Eris immediately held John's hand, then led him to the bedroom. "You see this, Papa? Mama was making for you new clothes". "I want to sew something good for you too, Papa... will you let me...?". - Maybe I should ask John to stay in the house for a few days to please our daughter
Right now, I'm just standing in the kitchen only for fun. Maybe I should make some good dishes. A light meal, perhaps... for a family of three, I'm so happy to do this.
"Papa... are you thirsty?". - Eris led John to the living room, then stopped walking. "Mama, are you cooking something?". - Feeling curious, my daughter led her daughter to my position
"Yeah, I intend to...". - I looked back to reply to my daughter. "Hey, John...". - I wrapped my husband's hand, tilting my head to him gently
"Since this is a very rare time the three of us can stay together... let's eat together". - I got my husband and my little daughter closer to me. "After that, we will be playing together". "Sounds good?". - Then I headpatted my daughter gently
"Okay, mama". - Our little daughter slowly pulled John's sleeves gently. "Papa, please talk more... you're so quiet".
To please Eris, my husband smiles at her. However, his smile isn't so pretty, since his face always looks so serious. But at least, John has done the best as he can. I get closer to my husband, hugging him.
"Please have one more day with our daughter, John...". - I whispered to him, saying out gently. "Look how cute and happy Eris is... don't you think it's more happy to have you?".
"Monsters are outside...".
"You don't know when I'll be behind you, John". "I've seen it, sometimes you just waited for night to go down just to go home though you didn't do anything much that day, please stop it...". "When you think there's nothing to be in the forest... please go home". "Your home always opens for you, your family and happiness are here with you".
"Hmmm...". - I actually want to kiss my husband, but our daughter is here so I will do that later. "Come on, sit...". - We came to the dining table, then I put my daughter and my husband on their seats
I later approach the kitchen, then start making a light meal for the family. Sometimes while making the desserts, hearing the happy voices of my daughter talking to her dad is enough to please me. Hmmm... I will soon join both of them too. I must hurry.
"Shera, you okay?". - All of sudden, my husband called me. "Hey...". - I heard him tap my shoulder. "Shera, hey...". - Eh...?
Now the scenery around me has changed. I feel a little bit sleepy to be honest... oh no. I'm sitting on a round wooden chair from what I can tell. Before me is no one but just my husband. He's checking on me, huh...? What I was doing earlier is so embarrassing.
"Yawn...". - I yawned right in front of my husband when he was crouching before me. "I'm sorry...". - I slowly hugged John, feeling his warmth
This time is the morning in the village already. We went outside to walk around the village to know more about the place and its people. Accidentally, we went to this lumber store. My husband came in to help the elven carpenters to chop some logs, I sat here to wait for him.
And somehow I ended up dozing off! It's quite annoying.
Fortunately, no one was around here when I was sleeping, good. Otherwise, people would've laughed at me because of my actions.
But at least, my husband's returned to me. I can't believe that I would get out of my dream that suddenly, sigh...
"By the way... where's Reimi?". - John looked around, wondering about my servant
"She wanted to look around the village's school... she may be in there...". - Not so good, I can't stop speaking with my husband in this sleepy voice. "Yawn... ehhh... yawn...". - Maybe I should yawn at my husband more when he has a need for it
"And you let her go?".
"Nod... nod...". - Right now you're not so good, I want to spend my time with you to make you happy, John
"We must find her".
"No...". - I grabbed his sleeves, shaking my head. "She hardly has time to be free, please let her be just in today... please".
"Alright alright...". - John tiredly replied to me, then he patted my head. "I'll find her in school later, now go home". - No, just focus on me, John, just your wife to be in the center of your mind and soul!
"But Yura isn't home...".
"Yeah, she's working on the field...". - My husband later carried me in his hands. "Well, but her house's never locked, so does every other house in this place, all we need is just open the door". - Maybe I should ask my husband to join me in the bed when we're home, so sleepy!
Both of us shortly leave the lumber store, my husband carries me home. I close my eyes due to my sleepiness. However, I sometimes open my eyes to look at the scenery around us. The village is now a bit cold, not many people are outside but at home.
From what we learned from Yura, this time is 1177, and right in the Winter season. Or to be more exact, this time is the Second Winter (December) in the year 1177.
We vanished from this world for just days. Now when we return, three years have passed so fast like a wind... my homeland, my brother - King Hoster. I wonder how is my homeland - Warsaw right now, and is my big brother doing well or not.
"Do you love to eat something, Shera?". - All of sudden, my husband asked me a strange question when he was carrying me home
"Eh...?".
"Those carpenters gave me some money when I helped 'em, here". - He later put in my palm a... plank of wood?
No, I shouldn't judge this small plank too quickly just by looking without analyzing the thing. If I look closely, I can see this small rectangular wooden plank is some kind of coin, a currency. The details printed on the wooden surface are quite simple, only have numbers... an Elfe coin?
"Elfe?". - I asked my husband
"It's the elven's currency".
"It's quite simple made...". - My hand slowly covered the entire coin. "No emblem of the Royal... no symbol of the Kingdom either... it's odd". - The elven's currency is so simple, just like the way they live in the forest, no civilization at all. "They're not scared...? I mean... their money can be faked...".
"With the elves, money is just something normal". "They don't need it to luxury or eye-catching, having a type of currency with the use is to trade is enough for 'em". - John walked slowly while explaining to me. "I don't know how the elves treat humans, but Sarah...".
"Nothing, Sa-". - John stopped saying her name by then. "That subordinate told me a story she heard from Yura". "If an elf with no money but has rocks or dirt, or anything he has in hands through picking up". "Then, he can trade with others by using them, with a particular price when those things are converted to their currency".
"Sorry, can you walk right now, Shera?". - Okay, I know my husband's just got sad once again
"Nod...". - Hearing that from me, John put me down
I hold my husband's hand and start walking together, we'll return to Yura's home soon. Hmmmm... I think I must do something to make John happy, I don't want to see him grumbling his face.
"It's the past now, John... please, we have to move on". - It will be a long progress to help my husband out of this
My mother died when I was still so young. Not much impression in that childhood, I did not even remember all details when my mom died. However, the recent dream about this case stunned me badly, I just don't want to remember it anymore.
My father's death is something different. That was very bad, very sorrowful to say. However, the culprit who killed my parents had finally died now. I think my father is now in heaven with my mom, so they've died peacefully.
My husband needs time to get over this pain. Now I must be with him to encourage him, must do all the best for John.
After thinking, both of us keep on walking on the road slowly and calmly. John suddenly stops walking, he stares at something on the left side. Being curious, I follow his look and realize that... my husband is gazing at an Elven guardsman.
"What are you doing, John?". - I asked my husband
"Nothing... maybe we can't ask him anything". - John replied to me then started walking again
"Let's go home, Shera... I'll buy you some food later".
Then, my husband surprisingly carries me in his hands, he starts walking home since then. Somehow, my husband doesn't seem to be sad anymore, he's calm. Maybe I should do something, maybe John is just pretending to be okay. I hug John tightly, then fall into his chest.
"Hey...". "John, if you're really sad right now... please tell me, I'll listen to your problems".
"Nod...". - My husband just nodded, then gently walked home with me in his hands
The road to go home isn't far. So after a few minutes, we finally reach home and are now standing before the door. Yura is now not at home, the prophet is working in the field with farmers. She will be home when it's noon, I think.
"Alright...". - John put me down on the floor, then opened the door to get inside
Both of us get inside the house, and feel so comfortable when we are now at home. I feel a bit sleepy, so immediately lie on a wooden couch before me.
"I'm sorry, yesterday I troubled you a lot...". - No no no, John. You did nothing wrong last night please don't say that, I love you, John!
"I feel happy when I can help you... you did nothing wrong".
Suddenly, my husband lifts me up and carries me to Yura's parents' bedroom. He puts me on the bed gently and silently. I feel so sleepy right now, it would be nice if my husband stays here with me.
"Rest here, I'll go to the field to tell Yura that you're home".
"Stay here, John...". - I grabbed my husband, not letting him go but wanting him to stay
"Okay okay...". - I'm glad when my husband always humors me, but I think he should think about taking care of himself more
"You're here is enough...".
Both of us later keep silent, John enjoys my hug, I enjoy it when my husband is with me.
"Hey, Shera...".
"Nod...?". - John wants to say something to me?
"This's a rare time we are free and comfortable together so...". "Can we talk about our future...? Even just a little bit, a few minutes?".
"Yes, of course...". - I'll go to sleep later, must spend my time with my husband first
"How do you think about this place...? It's good, isn't it?". - Ah, I remember that my husband intended to live in this village with me till the end of our lives
"Yeah, the place is peaceful... a perfect home for both of us". "However... its people here and the living way here, maybe I will have to get used to it for a while...".
"I hope you won't hate it here, actually".
"Shakes head, shakes head". "I won't... to be with you is enough, John...". - I hugged my husband tighter, even pulled him down to the bed, hehe. "When we have our first child, I would like to name her Eris...". - I closed my legs to hold my husband's back, not letting him go
"Yeah, sure we will...". - Keep playing with my hair, John!
"I...". - My husband stopped a little bit. "Well... you know we can't live in luxurious here, we'll start again from zero".
"That's so...?". - I was born as a Princess, I was born to live in luxurious life
Oh, I feel bad when my husband is misunderstanding me or something. His look tells me that he thinks I'm a woman who wants a rich husband who can feed the family through his richness. Yeah, the beginning will be hard, but I will get used to it very soon. We can live poor, but have to do our best to build for our children the best living environment.
"Don't worry about it, John...". "Hey... the beginning is difficult, but I'll surely get through it". "Hey, please don't misunderstand me, John...". - Seeing my husband not respond to me, I hugged him tighter than ever. "Kiss...!". - Then I kissed him sweetly. "John, I'm sorry if I hurt you". "I'll follow you... John... both of us will get through hard time to build good time for us, and our children too".
"Ah, sorry...". - Finally, my husband had responded. "Earlier I was... thinking about the way we will live here in the future". "I'll find a proper job here... sorry when I misunderstood you, Shera". - Then, John got off me then started looking outside of the window
"I'll find a job here soon, and... nevermind". - I know you sometimes have things you can't say out, John
"Having a job first is enough, John... money we can earn more in the future". - I wrapped his hand, holding it
"Hey, Shera...". - John turned back to see me. "About our child, I wanna talk about it too... just want to confess...". - He crouched down, slowly gazed at me
"You know... I'm not good at raising a child...". - My husband lowered his face, disappointed in himself. "Sometimes I can't control my emotions... I just don't want our kid to see me frequently because". "If a day I get mad and... I don't want it to happen, our child will suffer from hearing what I say and what I do". "But I won't hide away from our child like the way I used to do with our daughter anymore, Shera". "Now I just want to spend more time with you and our child... but I don't know how to...". - He started grumbling his face, feeling difficult to speak up to me
"I understand, I understand... come here, I'll help you". - Again, I hugged my husband to cure his childhood issues. "I'll do my best to cure your issues... so please do your best to give our children a nice childhood". "Aww... come here, why do I from your wife to your mom? Get here...". - Maybe I should be his mom sometimes, I will spend more time with my husband to heal his childhood wounds
"Sir Rigen, Mrs. Rigen, you two are in there?!". - Ah, who just had called us?!
I was startled to hear that woman's voice. Someone is inside the house, I guess so. John doesn't seem to be shocked, he just approaches the room's door. He opens half of the door then says something to the other side.
"That's Yura, she's home". - John told me while walking back to me. "She wants to cook some with the potatoes the farmers gifted her". - Later he sat on an empty bedside, staying silent
"May I go outside for a bit, Shera? I still have things to do and you're sleepy right now".
"Well...". - Honestly, I can't be selfish forever... having my husband to stay here with me for this long is enough
"Okay... I'll wait till you're home, John". "Kiss...". - Then I kissed my husband sweetly
"I'll go home fast, Shera". - John later got out of the room
Now only me staying in this small bedroom. I look at the roof then blink steadily, repeating the actions while thinking about my husband. Now my eyes are tired, I'm going to sleep. Just wondering if I can re-dream about my old timeline family or not.
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
"Urgh...?". - All of sudden, my eyes opened and I felt the weather to be a bit cool
From my view, I see it's quite dark right now. I'm sitting on a wide red cloth placed on the grass, below me are full of jars, baskets and boxes. Hmmmm... it looks like a picnic to me. Now I realize that a huge shadow of something is covering me.
"Hey, Eris! Come down quick! It's not good to be up there!". - John's yell suddenly woke me up from my sleepiness
I look on the right side, where the source came out. Then I see my husband, who is now raising a basket above with a nervous face, he's scared. Wait wait, I've returned to the dream of my old timeline's experiences. I wonder where is my daughter Eris...
Oh, I found her. My daughter is on the tree which is covering our picnic area, she may have climbed on it to pick fruits. Some fallen fruits can be seen all over the ground where my husband is standing.
"Shera, do something!!!". - All of sudden, he yelled at me
My ears were almost deafened after hearing my husband's yell. I get up, approaching John while looking at my little daughter. At this small age, I'm proud when my kid can do something nice. Especially when it comes to this part.
By the way. Although I was born in a Royal family, sometimes I also learned from Reimi some interesting things. Climbing the tree is a skill that I learned from her. Now I passed it down to my daughter, aww, so good!
"Papa, I will be okay...". - Eris sat on a tree line, she talked to us from above. "And Papa... Mama did nothing wrong, please be happy".
"I'll be happy when you get down here, Eris!". - John, please don't yell, our daughter is now practicing a skill of life. "C'mon, don't be up there anymore, go down...". - John dropped the basket, then raised his hands above, hoping Eris to go down
"John, I know you're worried, but this's just a lesson I want to teac-".
"You just only teach bullshit things!". - He scolded me without lowering his voice. "That's our daughter! What if something bad happens to her!". "She's too small to learn about this shit!". - He pointed at me, scolding
"Please, John, we rarely have time to be together like th-".
"Picnic is picnic! But our daughter is our daughter!!!". "She's still small, what if she falls and has problems?!!!".
"I'm just teaching our daughter some lessons of life, she needs practices t-".
"Shut the fuck off, you don't know any shit!!!". "What a stupid, you're the worst mother ever I h-".
"You should watch yourself and how you be with our kid, John!". - I endured a bit, then started reasoning the right things to ask my husband to understand. "You're scared of everything, how can our daughter grow if she isn't taught to do anything ! She can't be a baby forever!". "Life is long to her, but we have to teach basic things to our kid! She needs to have "basics" before stepping into her life!". "That's just what I teach her, John! Please listen!".
"But what if she falls?! She's still up there!!!". "Children are weak, our daughter may be injured or worse!". "I've told you not to teach her to cook but you kept doing similar things like this!". "It's very dangerous! Can't teach her things that can harm her! Like this one!".
"Papa, Mama! I'm here now! Please d-".
"Please listen, John! Our child can only grow when she experiences!". "Look at you, you don't raise, don't talk or do anything to care for our daughter!". "Please spend more time with us, I love you so please let me be the place for you to confess things you can't talk about!". "Our daughter is down here now, so p-".
"Shut the fuck up!!!". "Slap!". - A blow of slap hit my face before I could react
"Huh?! Dare to say loud to the one who feeds you, who feeds this entire family!". - All of sudden, my husband grabbed my collar. "Hah?! You like that?! You like that?! Die! Fucking bitch! Die!!!!". - He forcefully choked me, I felt hard to breath
"Papa!!!!!!!! Please stop!!!".
"Urrrghhh...". - John dropped me to the ground, I felt a bit hurt but now I could breath
"Fuck!!!". - John ran away, he covered his head and ran straight till the darkness absorbed him
"Papa!!!". - Eris was quite shocked when her father ran away, she was both worried about me and him
"Mama... what's wrong with Papa?". - My little daughter aided to lift me up. "Let's follow Papa, Mama! Here!". - Both of us started running, finding John
We run in the shadow till we reach a tree. There, a figure can be seen standing, expressing unpleasant emotions by walking around the tree repeatedly, non-stop. That's my husband, his emotions are now full of rage and sadness. I must do something to heal him.
"John... hey, please come b-". - We approached John, and he immediately cowered to the tree, silently. "I'm sorry, ummmm... I was loud to you earlier, please come back". - Tried to reach my husband, but he cowered like a child
"I'm not alright, stay away". - John shook my hand away, he went cold. "Eris should stay away too...". "Urrrghhh... sobs... sobs... sobs... sobs... sobs... fucking shit... fuck...". - Then he turned around, sobbing while holding his head, not letting us see him crying
When I don't know what to do to calm down my husband, our daughter comes to him silently. Eris grabs his leg, hugging it as if she's holding a pillow, our kid then sobs. Thinking about making up with my husband, I approach him from behind then hug him gently.
"Papa... please don't be sad". "If let me cry instead, Papa...".
"John, I'm sorry for what happened earlier". - I slowly made him feel my warmth. "I'm sorry... I should've been calmer earlier, I was quite loud to you earlier". "Please, John... if we don't teach our child anything, she won't know what to do when she grows up...". "Let's say it's my fault, I'm sorry for everything, John... please come back".
My husband doesn't reply, he stops sobbing but doesn't react to us. We stand under the tree for a while, maybe five minutes have passed now. John slowly turns around to look at us. The first thing is, he holds my hand then pats our daughter's head gently.
"Papa...". - Eris seemed to be happy or something. "Please, I don't understand much yet, but... can't we just sit there and enjoy our time together?". - She pointed to the picnic area, asking John to lead the three of us back there
John starts moving back to our picnic area. He doesn't say anything but holds our hands tightly, but I feel it's so gentle. My husband glances at me sometimes when we are going, but he doesn't speak.
"Papa, Mama... I love you both, you're the best...". - Eris enjoyed walking with us, she started walking faster to the destination. "I love it when the three of us can have time together... please don't be loud, Papa... Mama". "Let's go, let's go, over here, hehe!".
"I'm sorry for what happened earlier, John...". - I got closer to John, then wrapped his waist then kept going
"I love you... I won't let Eris do it again when we go picnic... unless you allow me to". "But... please don't close the door, our daughter always needs to get through things, we can't lock her forever".
"Nod...". - My husband only replied by nodding to me
My husband just silently pulls me closer to him. The three of us walk peacefully, going back to our picnic area to enjoy.
To be honest, I know my husband is annoying and troubling sometimes. But I love him, I know he has problems since he was affected from his childhood. I'll surely stay with John to cure his pain. Although this is just a dream, I really love to spend more of my time to be with my husband right now.
"John...". - Walking with John, I called him. "Ummm... hey". - Silently, I moved closer to kiss him when our daughter was in front of us
"Hey, you're sleeping, Mrs. Rigen?". - Sigh... Yura's voice just had disturbed my sleep. "Your husband's just gone out to buy something, but I see that he's finding Reimi". - Huh?!!!