The balcony offered a wonderful panorama of the outskirts of the city . The majesty of God was represented by the symmetry of trees of each side of the street . On a clear day,the leaves shimmered under the glare of the sun and the observant eye could discern as many colors and shades as the imagination would allow. Her hazel orbs beheld the scene.
Truly,the scene evoked a keen appreciation of Scott's poem,patriotism for even as she gazed on it,her heart burned within her.
She walked back to the dining room and sat there waiting for Hameed to show up
"Good morning,sorry I am a bit late"He hurriedly made his into the dining room more evidently,folding the long sleeve of his shirt to his elbow.
"Good mo..."her word made an abrupt stop at the base of her throat when Hameed leaned his body towards her ,his soft lips dabbed themselves gently on her forehead kissing it sensually. 'Just like I predicted it ,she didn't show any emotion but I knew I took her by surprise.Asma do you really think I will stop making moves on you,do you think giving me cold shoulders gonnah stop my advances of bringing out what you clocked inside your heart. You chose to be with me so know that you're stuck with me forever.' Hameed's thoughts as he found his seat opposite hers.
Yesterday night Hameed determined his heart to start using his moves,giving her space or accepting whatever she wanted was never an option ,if he wanted her to open up her heart to him and released the emotions she buckled.
"So what do we have for today"He voiced out looking at table that contained toasted bread,scrambled eggs,juice and then slices of fruits.
"What your eyes can view"she muttered slowly serving the scrambled eggs with the bread to his plate. Intertwining his hands,he placed his chin on top ,his face held a thoughtful look.
"View?my eyes only view you Asma"she dully looked at him and went back to her food.
Feigning a confused look he asked again
"So,are you implying that you're are my breakfast, Huh?"keeping her fork to the side she replied back
"You surely have a bad sight"
"No,I tend to see only what I intended to see"a grin placed itself on Hameed's lips.
She parted her lips to reply when his ringtone cut her off. 'Maama' Hameed voicelessly mumbled as he quickly picked up the call.
"SalamuAlaikum Maama, how are you doing?" Hameed greeted his mom as he placed his phone to his ear.
"Waalaikum salam Hameed I am doing good alhamdulilah, how's everything and Asma" her voice came
"Everything is good alhamdulilah and Asma ,she doing good too" he said out which gained Asma's attention as she had him uttered her name.
"Masha Allah"
"I wasn't able to send Maryam with the preserved food as we're quite busy these days" she added apologetically.
"No,Maama you don't need to worry, Asma is a great chef herself so she got you covered" Hameed replied looking up to Asma with a wink which she blankly looked at him and brushed his moves away.
"You made her cook Hameed! How unreasonable of you!" Aisha fumed her voice blaring through the phone speaker.
"No Maama, I didn't ask her to do it,she did it herself" he reasoned defending himself
"Okay, but still I am going to send Maryam
over with the food. She should have more rest before she gets back to school"she finally calmed down as her voice sounded surreal.
"Alright Maama ,we will be expecting her".
He replied back taking forkful of the scrambled eggs to his mouth.
"I don't know what's taking this girl so long,she's been in room her for two hours now getting ready" his mother ranted,Hameed lightly chuckled
"You know Maryam more than anyone Maama, she's just trying to find the perfect clothes to wear" Aisha lightly scoffed
"Like always you back her up , anyway I gotta go my regards to Asma,Allah Hafiz"
"Insha Allah, Allah Hafiz"Hameed laid his phone to his side as the call ended.
"Maama sent her regards" He stood up and packed the dishes away to the dishwasher.
"Thank you"Asma replied from her seat.
Hameed walked out to the living room and picked up his car keys,he stuffed them into his pants pocket then walked back to the kitchen where he found Asma the way he left her.
"I am going out and I won't be back early, and as Maama said Maryam is going to be here anytime okay?" he said making his way to her and gingerly kissed her forehead.
"Wait a moment please" she stood up and hurriedly made her way to their bedroom limping slightly on the way,the sprain had started to heal as it was not that severe ,not a moment she came back with a credit card and a note.
"Could you please buy me the series of these books on your way back" she said passing him the credit card and the note. Hameed silently looked at her stretched hand that held the card together with the note. He only took the note leaving out the credit card to her hand which earned him a pointed look.
"Don't worry I'll buy them for you"His emerald green orbs scrutinized the list of books then stuffed it into his pocket.
"Take the card,I don't want to owe you"she pursed it further.
"No you won't, Asma marriage is synonymous to compromise and sacrifice,sometimes you need to sacrifice something for your spouse, not all the time I get all I wanted or you get all you wanted sometimes I have to leave it for your sake and you do the same,also marriage is about appreciation,you cook for me I appreciate,pray for you then sometimes reward you with a gift.
So consider this as a gift"
"And my money is your money.Unless you want to owe yourself"
With that he kissed her forehead again and walked out.
She dazedly stood there her card slumped in her hand 'What was that Mr.Hameed,why are you so adamant about trying to change me,I just need my emotions back not something else,not something else!!'her mind silently re-emphasized .
'Then how do you know it was something else that he's trying to bring back not your emotions' something asked her from the back of her mind.
"I don't know,I really don't know, he's cornering me with each of his actions "this time around she voiced out her thoughts openly.
She gathered the used plates and cups to the dish washer and cleared the kitchen island .
She went to the living room to at least watch a movie before Maryam arrived ,she was half into the mythological movie when she heard the door bell. Asma paused the movie then limply walked to the main door and opened it. Maryam beamed face popped in with several bags by her side.
"SalamuAlaikum sister in law!!,how I missed you" Maryam belatedly hugged Asma
"Waalaikum salam"Asma replied as she pulled out from the hug. Maryam made her way into the hall way and closed the door behind.
'What's up with those bags?'Asma thought as she helped her with some of the bags,judging by the questioning look on Asma's face . Maryam then said
"Oh this"she looked down to her hands
I stooped by the shopping mall on my way to here,so I brought some little gift for you"
Little?Asma thought again looking at the jumbo size bags on her side
"Okay sister in law"Maryam dragged her into the living and sat her down she started ravaging inside the shopping bags where she brought out two matching blue colored abaya
"I bought us matching outfits" she glanced up to Asma who was looking at the blue abayas Asma was never a girl who wore vibrant colors she's always a fan of black and gray dark colors to be precise,so as she intensely looked at the blue abaya and for seconds the color her intrigued her.
"Don't bother ,We don't have to wear it at the same time,but I will really love it if one day we wear the same outfit"Maryam said her hands that held the clothes slumped down
"you see sister in law,though Hameed was really a good supporter and the best brother ever,but I was really and desperately in need of a sister to share my girly stuffs with" the dull look on Maryam immediately disappeared and transferred to her usual bubbly self
"And finally Allah S.W.T answered my prayers,He blessed me with you and a beautiful one at that". She playfully winked.
Asma accepted the gift with gratitude and Maryam helped her arrange the preserved food containers inside the fridge.
They sat there chatting about her school how hectic it was as she's at her first year.Asma was a year older than Maryam.They also talked about her friends and cousins whom she promised to introduce Asma to them.They continued chatting over cups of milk and the cookies Maryam brought. Though Maryam was mainly the one talking.
"Oh lord sister in law you're surely a good listener, let me be your best friend okay?"
"I already have one" Maryam grimaced when she heard she then said,
"Add one then,pretty please let's be three best friends"
Fateema and Maryam They'll have a great chemistry,both chatty Asma thought as she answered with okay.
"Lemme tell you a secret sister in law,I have someone that I love and I want to marry,but from what I can guess he only views me as a sister nothing more " Her face contorted into a sad facade because of her unrequited love.
"Who is the person that you want to marry"Asma only picked the word 'Marry' as the word 'Love' doesn't make that much sense to her.
"Ohh it is Mubeen Hameed's best friend" Maryam blushed deep red as she said his name, Asma dully looked at her and pointed out
"Your cheeks are red,you're not running a fever right?" Maryam hurriedly answered shaking her hands sheepishly.
"No I am okay!"
"About that,should I talk to Hameed about it" Asma offered.
"I will like that but let's make it another time insha Allah,I want to come clear with my feelings first" Maryam said with serious and determined face.
They continued to chat about different matters though Asma was not that conservative Maryam enjoyed chatting with her. Maryam now stood outside the door ready to bide Asma goodbye.
"Thank you so much for today,next time we are going out for sisters bonding shopping insha Allah" Asma nodded her head and Maryam squeezed her into a hug.
"Bye sister in law" with that Maryam walked away from the main door to her car. Asma closed the door behind when she saw Maryam's car leaving the parking lot.
She went to the living room and packed the shopping bags Maryam brought. She took them to the walk in wardrobe and neatly arranged the clothes into her closet. When she brought the light blue abaya,her slender fingers gently traced the silky fabric.
For some unknown reasons the color really fascinated her. She put it back in the closet and walked to the balcony admiring the twilight that was about to set in.
"SalamuAlaikum" Hameed walked into the into the balcony with a paper bag and small flower vase . He decided to come back early not wanting to leave her alone.
"Waalaikum salam"she turned around to look at Hameed's face.He sat at one of the chairs in the balcony and heaved a tired sigh.
She also found a seat and sat,her eyes trained to the small flower vase of lavender. Hameed observed that her gaze lingered on the small vase.
"Lavenders?" He asked
"Yes" she nodded her head 'so she's into flowers and lavenders particularly' he thought.
"Why?"he asked again
"Scent of lavenders, Abundance is the sharp smell of lavender on a beautiful spring morning."
"What's your favorite flower?" Asma asked him, Hameed stared at Asma and said
"Sunflowers symbolize unwavering faith and unconditional love, so I prepare sunflower".
""Always look at the brighter side of life, just like the sunflower, which looks upon the sun, not the dark clouds."
"How about hobbies?,do you have one" she didn't answered right away and Hameed added
"Something you do at your leisure time,like me, I go to gym or read books".
"I garden or read books also" she answered when she got a hint about hobbies.
"I brought the books" when he heard the word book he immediately passed her the bag and walked back into their room.
Asma followed him checking what's Inside the bags
"I didn't write these kinds of books" she said and also found her seat and the edge of the bed.
"Well,I changed it, try them they're not bad" He replied with a little shrug and his orbs trailed from her face to the sets of romantic books she was holding.
"I didn't ask for this either" she raised a pink covered note book,her dull eyes looking from the pink glittered book to his emerald green eyes.
"That's a diary" he nonchalantly answered, Hameed was trying not to give her a way that she could refuse them.
"And what was it for"she asked again. He released a sigh and then said.
"It is a book where you write your thoughts out,or a memory,a moment and also a secret that you hold dear to you"
"My mind is vast and sufficient ,it can accumulate all that it could ever think" that was her reply and she shoved the books back into the paper bag.
"Thank you for this" she rose to her feet and started to walk away.
"Poor choice of words!!" his surreal voice echoed around the room and her steps halted but she didn't turn back.
"You're too naive if you do believe life is all about what's in your mind or about what it can accumulate ".
"What a diction! Mr.Hameed, I believe you got my words wrong". His words got her and she sat back to where she sat earlier.
"There's nothing wrong with my words Asma ,your thinking made it so". Asma didn't want to back down and her next statement was
"My thoughts can not be seen,can not be felt. so they can only be heard when I choose to voice them out"
"And why can't you voice them out,ehum? Why do keep them to you?"
"Because I own myself Mr. Hameed" she didn't know why but she's feeling that she's definitely the one that will lose at the end. And what she felt was right as his next statement rendered her speechless.
"Sense of belonging is behind,your emotions are ahead,and they are many paths to tread through the shadows to the edge of the night,until the stars are all alight". Hameed was right 'Where there's life there's hope'. She might be alive without breath,cold as dead,never lively,ever finding but in the end it's only a passing thing this shadow,this ride ,even the darkness must pass.
"Asma you owned yourself but you don't own your emotions. It's when darkness creeps in that stars alight, so like your emotions I trigger them and you let them out."