As I stepped outside into the southern palace gardens, I was greeted by hazy autumn weather and a cold wind. Immediately I shivered a little because my official uniform wasn't made for colder weather.
Maybe I should have taken the time to put on my winter clothes. But then I might miss the magician here. I couldn't take that risk. I needed answers.
I rubbed my hands for some warmth and stamped against the cold as I looked around. But apart from young birch trees and a few flower beds, which of course had no blossoms at this time of year, I saw nothing.
Did I draw the wrong conclusion? What if the witch wasn't even here?
I noticed self-doubt nagging at me. Maybe I've just gotten way too delusional. Maybe the crow was just an ordinary crow and not a magical being. I had ditched my best friend for a random bird outside. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad because of my desperation.
Suddenly I heard a loud croak that drew my attention to one of the treetops. A crow sat there, eyeing me with interest.
"Are you one of the magician's crows? If not, then this is going to be embarrassing..." I mumbled the last sentence to myself.
Now I was already talking to crows. I guess I was slowly going insane.
"If you belong with the magician...then...could you help me? Can you take me to her? I need to speak to her urgently because-"
"What is there to discuss?"
I cried out in shock when I suddenly heard a feminine voice behind me. It was like the magician had teleported behind me.
"Ah lady... court mage..." I wasn't sure how to address her.
"Isaya. Just call me Isaya" She corrected me.
"Isaya...right..." I remembered her name.
"You were with the prince again last night, weren't you?" She got straight to the point, which surprised me a bit.
I quickly looked around to see if anyone was watching or overhearing. But in this weather nobody was outside.
"Yes... I have also learned that you and the prince both know my true identity." I let her know.
"Is that so?" Isaya asked with a slight smile. However, it looked as if she already knew everything.
"Therefore... I would like to ask you not to tell anyone. Otherwise there could be some …problems..."
"I thought so too. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone anything..." the magician began, musing. I was just about to thank her when she suddenly continued: "...as long as you stick to what I asked you to do. Consider it a give and take. One hand washes the other. I'll keep your secret for me and you help me to undo my mistake."
I stiffened a little. I actually wanted to distance myself a bit from Cain...now that I knew something was actually wrong with him and that he was very unstable. I didn't necessarily want to experience what I had experienced last night a second time. Not with this monster.
But I also knew that I was one of the few who even knew about his condition. And I was probably one of the few - maybe even the only one - who could help him. I also knew that Isaya wasn't negotiable. That's why I went into the deal.
"The prince... is he... cursed? Did you curse him?" I asked in a serious tone.
"Hmm, maybe..." Her answer was vague.
"On whose orders?"
"Unfortunately, I can't tell you that without dying afterwards."
She probably couldn't answer my questions directly. At least not when it could harm a member of the royal family. Otherwise the magical oath would probably kill her.
"It has to be someone from the royal family. Someone you report to. At least if you go by who you swore an unbreakable vow to."
"You're smarter than expected..." She said, indirectly confirming my assumption.
"...even if the king doesn't like his son, I can't imagine that he would just let his only male heir get cursed like that. He wouldn't hurt his own family's reputation …" I thought out loud, "I don't really know the prince's two younger sisters very well, but they seem to keep out of political affairs. Then the only one who remains... is the queen?" I concluded, a shadow crossing my face.
I haven't seen the queen very often. This was mainly because I was more with Cain at the time and Cain notoriously avoided all of his family members.
I only spoke to her once - back in town. However, during our brief conversation, she had made her position and dislike for Prince Cain very clear.
It would be foolish for anyone else to let their cards be seen so openly. But she was the queen. Who were you to question her? Also, Cain didn't have the best reputation in the kingdom anyway. It was certainly not uncommon to say condescendingly things about him. So the queen didn't stand out. Besides, almost nobody knew that Cain was cursed. Most just assumed he was just that way by nature.
The queen's plan was pretty cunning. She didn't even have to hide her true feelings. Maybe she even started those nasty rumors about Cain, just to express her own disgust nonchalantly.
Then the only question left was: Why was she doing all this? She was already the queen. She was in the highest position a woman can achieve in this country. What else did she want? Why did she torment her husband's only son and risk their authority?
"The Queen is carrying a child in her womb. She hopes it will be a male heir..." Isaya suddenly let me know as if she had read my mind.
I held my breath as all the pieces of the puzzle came together in my head to form a complete picture.
"...this child...could challenge Cain in his place as heir to the throne... Is that why the Queen had Cain cursed? To make his father and his empire hate him even more? So that her son can rule? For her blood to flow in the highest line of government?"
Isaya said nothing. However, the look on her face told me that I was absolutely right.
"You're a blood mage, aren't you? Can't you see if the queen's unborn child will be a boy or a girl?"
"I can do that … And her hope will unfortunately come true. There will be another male heir in a few weeks. That's why I'm running out of time. I keep avoiding the queen so she can't ask me. You can't have someone send for me. You have to find me yourself. That was my condition in the contract I entered into. It was a loophole I created so I could avoid the intrigues of the palace … I'm afraid that if she finds out, she wants to get Cain killed."
"That's awful! We have to do some-"
"Listen, Chris. Cain's curse is not a demon possessing him. It's his alter ego. It grows in power when Cain experiences injustice. And lately it's been getting stronger, almost unstoppable. His alter ego is magical in origin and based on a curse that grants him inhuman powers the further he is fed with hatred, jealousy and greediness. But every curse can be broken. That is a magical law. At least that's the theory…"
"How do you break the curse?" I was getting a little impatient.
If there was already a solution to breaking the curse, why didn't she mention it from the start? Why was she so hesitant?
"You can only break the curse with true love." She said with a serious look.
I couldn't help but cringe a little at her response.
"True love? Seriously?"
"You misunderstand me, dear Chris. They chose true love as a protection for the curse because it doesn't exist."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Take a look around, Chris. Have you ever witnessed real true love? Or experienced it? Everywhere there is only doubt, hatred and jealousy. People let others down over little things. They even betray each other. Everyone thinks of themselves first. True love only exists in fairytales and only delusional people believe it is real. Therefore, Cain's curse cannot be broken. It's my fault."
It was the first time I saw the magician so depressed. I felt bad for her.
"And... and yet... you haven't given up your hope entirely." I said more or less confidently. As she looked up at me, I continued, "You asked me to get closer to the Prince because you secretly still had hope that we might fall in love, didn't you? … Cain said you can see inside people's heads. And what you saw in me didn't seem as depraved as you first thought, did it? So you had some hope again. I wish you would hold on to it. It's not over yet. We still have a chance."
I sounded braver than I felt right now. Actually, I didn't want to meet Cain's alter ego anymore. But if it had to be in order to save his existence, then I had to go through it for better or worse.
Maybe that was the meaning of my own existence here in this world. Maybe the fortune teller meant Cain when she said that I would already help the right people.
My life only has a meaning if I give it one myself, doesn't it? And if that wasn't a reason, then I don't know what is.
I made the decision at the same time as I clenched my fists vigorously.
I wouldn't avoid Cain. I would face the problem. I would help him.
"Cain's alter ego has specific boundaries. It could never do anything that Cain couldn't also do. I designed the curse in such a way that Cain might still have some control over it subconsciously. His moral boundaries are the same as for his alter ego."
"Does Cain know when his alternate form has the upper hand?"
"His consciousness is mostly dormant at this time. He doesn't know that he didn't really do any of that. His alter ego plants distorted versions of the events in his mind. That's why he doesn't understand why the others treat him the way they treat him. That they call him a monster and such. And that leads to even more injustice for him. The curse feeds on it."
"That's awful. We have to stop it!" I said in panic. We really didn't have much time left and the task i now had was anything but easy.
"Shh, not so loud. Someone is coming." Isaya whispered to me.
She probably sensed another body with her magic powers in the garden, because I didn't saw anyone here. However, she seemed pretty sure there was someone else who wasn't supposed to be here. Because shortly afterwards she dissolved again in mysterious smoke.
'Do your best Chris.' I heard her say softly at the end.