"Why do we need a war, Lucas?" I ask him while he's cleaning up my wound.
He forced me to the infirmary. I couldn't refuse because I needed to put antiseptic on my cut anyway. After Lucas and I got back, the cottage was packed by the curious Fighters. Also, I need a moment with him alone to talk about what he's been planning to do, and I need to get as much information as possible from him.
Lucas says nothing until I pull his hand away from my forehead. "Lucas, answer me!"
"Stay still, Ava!" says Lucas when he accidentally scratches my wound. That stings, but I ignore it because I must stay mad.
I stand up from the bed and start to walk towards the door. But before I can reach the handle, Lucas is suddenly behind me, pulling me to a stop.
"Why are you acting like this?"
"Like what?" am I that bad at staying angry with someone?
He pulls me back inside and lifts me to the bed like I weigh nothing. "Can you please stop answering with another question?" he sighs. "You're acting strange!"
"No, I'm not!"
"There are things you shouldn't be asking," Lucas finally says, his intimidating eyes digging into mine. If those green eyes didn't feel too familiar, I would've gauged them out right now. He doesn't stop staring at me like he's searching for a secret, as if he knows I'm hiding something from him.
"You're not being fair to me, Lucas!" I say before averting my gaze down to my lap because his answer is blatantly in my eyes. "I thought I was a part of the Fighters, but you never tell me anything! I thought the training was supposed to prepare us if the Monarch finds out about this camp! But suddenly, now there's going to be a war? What the hell is this, some kind of conspiracy or something?"
"You are one of us, Ava! Why can't you just do it for no specific reason?" he sits back in the chair next to the bed. He buries his face in his hands like he's just trying to ignore my presence. Here we go again; people always push me away when I start asking questions.
"You don't go gathering people, training them as soldiers, and killing the dictators for no specific reason, Lucas! Did World War happen because all parties just felt like having a war then?"
Lucas doesn't budge from his place, and he barely breathes when I start raising my voice.
I roll my eyes at him, finally feeling frustrated too. "Look, I can still go back home now if you don't want me here, okay? It's not like you need an additional weak member of Fighters anyway," I can't even hide the anger in every word I say.
Lucas looks up at me, and his eyes look hurt. Oh, he's capable of feeling something now, isn't he? And I thought he was such a cold fish after all this time for showing no compassion to me during training.
And why is he suddenly offended? Did I say something wrong? Shouldn't it be me who gets hurt? Before I ran away, my own family ignored me. They avoided my questions like they weren't my secrets, and I didn't need Lucas to do the same to me. I feel unworthy, to say the least.
"You can't go back to the city!" Lucas abruptly says in his shaky voice. I know he's considering telling me his plan, even though I already know it from Peter. I still need to listen to it directly from him, and I need him to trust me.
"Why not?"
He doesn't answer me again, and I have enough of his silence for one night. I don't care if Peter will kill anybody he wants just because I can't get Lucas to talk. I am so tired of everyone expecting many things from me, but when I need my share, they always ignore me.
I get off of the bed as I try to avoid him for the second time tonight. I will fight Lucas this time if he tries to stop me. If he thinks I'm incapable of hurting anybody, I will prove him wrong. "Fine, suit yourself! I'm out of here."
I start to walk towards the door, and I can hear Lucas standing up from his chair, "In three weeks, the Fighters will march to the city, and I want you to stay here with Daisy. Do you understand?"
Why does he want me to stay here when everyone is killing the culprits in the city?
When I turn to face him, Lucas stands close behind me.
I'm practically screaming after Lucas mentioned when he'll attack the Monarch. "What's with this stupid war you're preparing for? And I won't ask you again for the fifth time this night, Lucas! Either tell me everything, or I will leave here and return to the city."
Lucas bites the inside of his mouth as if my threat affects the decision he's about to make. Why is it so hard to talk to me? I'm not going to punch him every time he says something.
"We're going to stop the Monarch," he closes his eyes as he lets out the words, and they remain shut when the following words come out of his mouth. "To stop the annihilation."
Lucas knows about the Monarch's plan; of course, that's why he wants to attack them. What else? Why didn't Liam or anybody in the Warriors camp notice it? Unless someone among them is hiding something.
"Why are you waiting for seven years to stop the Monarch? Is there something that I've missed around here?" I say to him, feeling like I've just been played by these two opposite camps?
"We're waiting until the Monarch is weak, and they are now. That's why," says Lucas matter-of-factly.
My breathing becomes heavy, and I clutch the doorknob to keep my balance. My head is still full of unanswered questions, but I can even let them out all at once. This is too overwhelming!
"Promise me you're not going anywhere near the city, Ava!" Lucas reaches for my hand and squeezes it as if he's threatening me.
"Why?"
God, would you please let me rest for at least? I don't know how long, for the rest of my life.
Lucas suddenly pulls me into his arms before wrapping them around my body, "Because I don't want anything to happen to you, Ava! If I know you're on the battlefield with me, I will focus on your safety." His body is strikingly shaky. "And I need my focus to keep the plan going well and the safety of all my Fighters. If you stay here with Daisy, at least I know that you'll be safe."
Oh, shit, this ain't good.
"But I can fight, Lucas!" I mumble from his chest, which I think will explode anytime soon. "That's why you want me to be trained, right?"
Lucas lets my body go and only stares at me for a full second. His eyes show nothing but worry, "I want you to train because I know what you are capable of. I want you to train so that you can protect yourself if I'm not around."
"But why?"
"I know you're strong, Ava. But you're not as strong as me, and if you get hurt, that will weaken me during the battle. I'm not going to be here when the war starts, and I will not be able to make sure that you're okay. I just want you to be able to protect yourself and the rest of the people in this camp. That's why I always push you to train and to go hunting, to keep you strong physically and mentally. Now do you understand why I want you to stay here with Daisy, don't you?"
I nod slowly, knowing that Lucas doesn't mention anything else. I can't believe it. I really can't believe what he just said and how easy this mission Peter gave me. I've got all the answers and don't need one week to find them. It only took me three hours! Why couldn't anyone else before me succeed just like I did?
Because they never got the last information.
Lucas's weakness. They failed because Lucas only had liability once I showed up here. But how could Lucas find out about them spying on him? I hope they didn't bluntly ask him what his weakness was.
"Ava, do you understand why I want you to be safe?" Lucas snaps me back from my thoughts.
"Yes," I say in a weak breathy voice.
***
Back in Daisy's cottage at night, I take out the piece of paper Peter gave me three days ago from my backpack.
I start to write my answers on the back of the paper to remember them when I return to his camp.
I can't fucking draw, Peter! I'm not Picasso. But I can show you the way.
One week from now. No starting point; just go straight to the fucking Monarch and hide there and wait for the ambush.
Total = 376. Fighters = 250 (including me and Lucas).
Ava.
I grimace to see my last answer. Why am I his weakness?