". . . "
Arabella felt like she wilted when Ferdinand just stared at her like she was some kind of weird creature.
'Right. Ferdinand was a coldhearted scum. What did I hope for? I got too used to Icarus who at least listens and does what I say. Icarus is a gentleman. They are completely different.'
She reminded herself, she should stop thinking that what works with Icarus may work with the ruthless Ferdinand as well, or else, she might just end up digging her own grave.
Annoyed as she was, she wanted to keep on grumbling more. Her effort to act all cute and pitiful went to waste even when she did her best to do it despite having to step on the pride of her consciousness as a forty-year-old lady.
And then. . .
Flump. Her back suddenly hit the soft bed. Her head was back on her pillow.
'Huh?'
Arabella suddenly found herself pushed down the bed with her hands pinned on either side of her and Ferdinand hovered on top of her.
'Did Ferdinand get angry? He could have just said no. Why would he be so furious about it?' she blinked rapidly and looked into his eyes.
Ferdinand's green eyes darkened as they bored into hers. He was staring at her like he was ready to kill her. She prepared herself for what comes next.
But. . .
[Just now. She looked way too adorable. How can I hold back if she looks at me like that while wearing so little? Her sleeping dress is way too thin. Her cleavage is peeking and I can see the outline of her nipples. I want to attack her right now. Look at her acting like a little bunny. It makes me want to devour her.]
'HUH?!'
Arabella wanted to hit her head to make sure she wasn't in another nightmare. The thoughts coming from this Ferdinand were simply too outrageous and too unlike the one she knew from her former life.
'Was his personality changed in this lifetime?'
It could be the only explanation for why her husband was thinking so weirdly.
Or, the thoughts she could hear were wrong. It may be the gods playing their tricks on her again.
[No. I should calm down. I am Ferdinand Valeria. I am the epitome of self-control. I can't stoop low to this level.]
Ferdinand went back to sitting beside her.
'Huh? What the hell did he mean by being the epitome of self-control? As far as I recall, he was gloomy, moody, and ruthless. I can perfectly recall he killed a lot of people during the duration of our marriage just because he was in a bad mood. Where in that was self-control? Stoop to this level my ass. You were that low in the first place. Bastard.'
Arabella wanted to glare at him but she didn't dare since he would surely notice with his sharp eyes.
[Yes. That's right. I have to calm down. I have always been able to hide my real emotions. Fuck these bodily urges. I have to act as usual. My newlywed wife might get terrified if I was too rash.]
'Bodily urges?' Arabella frowned and blinked rapidly when she heard his thoughts. She was wide-eyed when she noticed the bulge on the sheets where Ferdinand's crotch was. She quickly looked away before he catches her looking.
'He's aroused? I . . . We didn't even do anything. Why is he acting like some kind of youngster? He is too old to be this energetic.'
Huh? No. He wasn't. Arabella wanted to rub her temples when she recalled this Ferdinand was in his twenties right now. He was at the peak of his libido and sex drive.
And she was still eighteen. She was too used to being forty and simply couldn't get used to the idea she was already reborn and this was a new life. Her second life.
'Right. He was also lustful once.'
In her previous life, Ferdinand also lusted for her body during the night even though he didn't even care about her in the morning.
The way he unbelievably lusted and craved for her at night led her to misunderstand it as something else.
She thought he had feelings for her which was why he craved for her so much. She didn't realize it was just a normal urge he felt from being beside a beautiful lady with a good body.
Only later did she realize she was wrong. But it was too late since by the time, she was already hopelessly in love with him.
Arabella once fell for his hot kisses and warm touch. But she would not allow it to happen again in this lifetime.
"I'll think about it. Who among your maids would you like to be sent here?" Ferdinand suddenly spoke in his normal cold tone.
Arabella perked up at his response. But she slowly sat up so as not to look too expectant.
"Uhm, I'd like to have Aletha with me. She's been my maid since childhood so I can talk about a lot of things with her," Arabella acted all pitiful again since it seemed to be working.
"Alright. I'll tell you my decision in a few days. Is there anything else you would like from Lobelius?"
[I'll pretend to not like the idea but I'll let her maid come here. It would be good if someone among the maids is on her side.]
Arabella hid a smile at that. It was nice to know he had already made a decision. She was eager to see Aletha after so long. The last time she had seen her was twenty-two years ago before she got married in her former life.
She also missed dishes from Lobelius. If Ferdinand had allowed her to go home, she would have loved to see her family too and have a good meal with them.
"If you allow Aletha to come here, I bet she'd know what to bring and have it all packed along with her things," Arabella smiled at the thought.
She simply knew Aletha would bring ingredients for her favorite dishes packed in the magic tool for storing food.
Aletha had always been thoughtful of her.
If Arabella has to live this life again anyway, she should at least have some allies by her side and enjoy some of life's gratuities while things are calm.
[She's smiling. This is the first time I saw her smile since she arrived here. Does she like that Aletha maid so much? I have to get to know her.]
Arabella flinched and turned at Ferdinand.
'What did he mean by getting to know Aletha? He wouldn't hurt her would he?!'
"I see. Go back to sleep for now. I have something to do so I'll be leaving now," Ferdinand got out of bed before she could reply.
[I need to get her maid investigated. If they are so close, I might get to know my wife through her. Moreover, I can't stay in this room anymore. I might just go crazy if I keep inhaling Arabellla's intoxicating sweet scent.]
Arabella glanced down and noticed the bulge in Ferdinand's pants. She had an inkling of what else he had to do aside from getting Aletha investigated.
She didn't know her husband was so sensitive. She formerly thought her wiles worked for other men except for her husband.
But one more thing stuck to her. Since when was Ferdinand ever interested in getting to know more about her? Didn't he marry her just to have an heir due to his ministers' pestering?
With Ferdinand gone from her room, Arabella was finally alone. She sighed in relief and lie back down on the bed.
The silence was refreshing after having to hear people's thoughts all day and having to deal with Ferdinand.
She thought some more about the nightmare she had and concluded she won't be trusting Renee this time.
Whether it was just a nightmare or a memory, Arabella had to be more careful and gather information herself especially since she could hear people's thoughts now.
Arabella slept well when she was alone in bed. Having Ferdinand beside her must have triggered her nightmare.
After all, how could she sleep well beside the man she plotted to kill. She even watched him die in her arms. It was simply so weird to have him beside her even if this was the next life.
His last words before his death still bothered her so much. Especially the bittersweet smile which graced his lips along with the weird look in his eyes as if he was happy to die in her arms.
She put it all behind her mind and focused on what she had to do first. If she was to survive being Ferdinand's wife again, she had to plan how to do so, especially with his violent tendencies when he was angry.
He never physically beat her before but she knew a lot of people in the palace whom he killed when he was angry.
She had to ensure the allies she would gather would be safe from him.
As such, for the next few days, she focused on understanding her ability and practicing how to use it.
She successfully evaded consummating the marriage with Ferdinand by pretending to be asleep every time he goes to her chambers.
From his thoughts, she learned Ferdinand knew she was pretending to be asleep but pretended not to notice. He just lay beside her since he had to keep visiting her chambers to satisfy his ministers that he was doing his duty as an Emperor.
Ferdinand kept having lustful thoughts about her, but Arabella, with her mental consciousness as a forty-year-old woman, just let it pass.
He also kept leaving marks on her neck or arms for the maids to see and conclude they were indeed consummating.
Arabella was rather surprised he had that much patience and didn't tell her to perform her duties as a wife just to satisfy his ministers. She just concluded he must have a bit of a different personality in this lifetime.
And in two weeks' time, Aletha finally arrived in Valeria.