"Just go down the hill" they yelled.
If it wasn't for my un natural urge to fit in, I wouldn't have even been here in the first place. My boots slowly filled with mud as I slowly made my way down the swampy slope.
"Why are you doing this?" I mumbled to myself. "They don't even like you, but here you are, trying to get a stupid ball that they purposely tossed down here".
I sighed as I looked up at the group of kids one last time. I could hardly make out their faces but that did not stop me from seeing a few smirks and hearing a bunch of laughter.
Was this a prank? Did they even throw the ball down here? My questions were finally answered when one of the girls yelled out to me.
"Hey James!!! My bad!! I have the ball right here!" She said as she let out a loud laughter.
Even though I was far away, I could still see the blue and purple ball in her hand. How could I have been so stupid? I sighed and turned around as I tried to make my way back up the hill, only to have a horrible realization. There was no way back up, I was left to the mercy of these people.
"Hey guys, I can't get back up" I yelled as I tried to grip the ground in-font of me.
"Oh really?" One of the boys said looking down at me. "That's a shame"
"Cut it out!" I yelled back. "Help me get up!"
I heard a few more laughter as they slowly began to walk away. They were planing to leave me here. That had been their plan this whole time and I had fallen for it, I really thought they liked me.
"Guys! Please!" I yelled one last time as the last girl slowly disappeared from my view.
It was getting late and the temperature was dropping quickly. I felt my asthma starting to act up on me, and I hadn't brought my inhaler with me. I didn't want it falling out of my pocket and risk anyone seeing it, but now, I wish I had brought it with me. I began to cough as I tried to gasp for air, but the cold air was making it worse. I digged my fingers into the muddy ground one more time as I slowly began to crawl up the slope. I felt tears escape my eyes as I looked up at the sky. My mom was right, no one wanted me, not her, not my dad, and not even the kids from school. I was a nobody. Finally I pulled myself up onto the ledge of the slope. I had made it back up, on my own, in the dark, and in the middle of a severe asthma attack.
I slowly stood up and began stumbling home. I had made it this far, I can't just give up now. I grabbed my chest as I tried to gasp for more air, it felt like my lungs were about to give out, and sharp a pain began going up my neck. Suddenly I saw my house in the distance, I don't know when I began running towards it, but I was glad to see my legs hadn't given up, before long I had burst through the front door, pushed pass my alcoholic mom standing in the way and headed upstairs to my bedroom. I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff of the medicated air. I slowly felt my lungs start to work again.
If I believed in God, I would have called the complete experience a miracle.
"Hey what the heck?!" My mom shouted as she banged on my now locked bedroom door.
"You disappear for hours and then show up all muddy! What on Gods earth were you doing?!"
"Why don't you go back to drinking and smoking and continue acting like you never had a kid!" I yelled back at her.
"Open this door now!" She screamed, now more agitated than before.
Angrily I stood up from the floor and swung the bedroom door open.
"What?! What do you want?!"
"I want you out of my house!" My mom yelled as she smashed her wine bottle over my head.
I fell back on to the ground while gripping the now open wound on my head. Blood began to ooze through my fingers and drip onto the carpet.
"You're just like you're father! Why don't you just run away like he did?! And never come back here!"
I slowly stood up still holding onto the cut on my head.
"Say something!" My mom said pushing me. "Hit me like your father use to"
I turned my back to her while I slowly began to gather a few things and stuff them into a bag.
"Where're you going James?!" She mocked as she continued to shove me.
"You got no where to go, and no one to take you in!"
I let go of my wound for a moment while I continued to push the items into my bag. I was actually losing a lot of blood.
"Do something!" She yelled as she tugged my hair. "Do something!"
Suddenly I turned around to face her and wrapped my hands around her neck, I slowly began to squeeze. She tried her best to scratch me but I just slammed her into the wall. I was tired, tired of the abuse of the beatings, I was tired of everything. When I saw her losing the battle, I let her go and her body slumped to the floor. She looked up at me with fear in her eyes, the same way she used to look at my dad. I guess I was like my father after all. I grabbed my bag and walked pass her, not even saying another word. She wanted me out, well then, I was going to leave, no amount of shelter justified the level of abuse.
Where was I going? Don't know, how will I survive? Don't know. I'm just going to let fate guide me.