Today, another fucking day begins just the same.
No, it's not exactly the same.
For some fucked-up reason, there seems to be a slight change.
"Let's summarize"
To calculate the goddamn force of tension, you need to consider both the positive and negative forces.
Simply put, forces acting upwards and downwards can be derived using the damn formula.
But how the hell do you calculate the diagonal force of tension?
You can fucking divide it into the X and Y axes. Do you get it now, you bunch of morons?"
...I get it.
Just last week, I couldn't grasp any of this general physics bullshit for college.
For some reason, today, it feels like I understand everything as I hear it.
Of course, I've missed a lot and my grasp of basic concepts isn't as solid as it should be...
But somehow, I feel like I'm piecing things together and understanding.
Have I finally lost my fucking mind?
"Shall we solve a problem, you lazy shits? Try solving problem 5.2. I'll give you 5 minutes, assholes."
"Yes-."
With a small response from the students, everyone started solving the problem.
Typically, university lectures are attended by 40 to 50 students in a large lecture hall.
But there are also quite a few classes with small groups of 8 students in smaller rooms.
Especially with the recent decline in academic performance among new students, they've adopted this intensive professor-marking system.
Whether this method is effective or not... it does force you to keep your eyes open, which might be helpful.
'Can I solve this shit?'
My heart raced.
The total sum of forces is calculated based on zero. Sigma F=0.
Left diagonal A1, right diagonal A2, and A3 which supports the object.
The weight is denoted by B, and the direction of B moving downward is Bg, calculated by multiplying by gravity.
All forces can be simply divided into X and Y for calculation.
The xi formula is derived by taking only the X components of A1 and A2's diagonals.
The yi formula is derived by taking only the Y components of A1 and A2's diagonals.
The direction of forces is considered positive if they are upwards in Y or to the right in X.
So then?
Using the triangular equation, you can calculate the total sum of forces.
Xi => A2cosθ2 - A1cosθ1 = 0
Yi => A1sinθ1 - A2sinθ2 - Bg = 0
By substituting the given numbers in the example, you can calculate the total sum of forces.
'What the actual fuck is this?'
I don't even know what's happening to me.
Just days ago, I was like the others, struggling with my head buried in the books.
"Uhm..."
"Sigh..."
As expected in a university where many thugs attend, everyone was struggling.
I was definitely like that until a few days ago.
But suddenly, something in my head changed, and now I understand things smoothly.
'What the fuck is this really?'
Because of Juha Lee, did I overcome my fear of girls? Or did escaping from that fear somehow clear my mind?
...That can't be right. It's been over a week since I got over that fear. There was no change until recently.
Then, maybe because of my first kiss with Juha?
Does kissing make your brain work faster or suddenly smarter? That's bullshit.
I was supposed to die as a virgin nerd, but because I succeeded in kissing, did my brain just open up?
...Nerd thoughts. But thinking about that kiss makes me feel like I'm getting a boner.
Anyway, no matter how much I think about it, I can't figure it out.
What exactly made my brain suddenly clear?
Since yesterday, I definitely feel something has changed. What the hell could it be?
'Poker?'
The thought suddenly crossed my mind.
Poker, which I hadn't even looked at before. Hold'em.
For months, I've been living without much thought, just walking around, eating, and shitting.
But yesterday, I focused on something for the first time in a while.
...Does that make any fucking sense?
Did playing a few rounds of poker really make my brain work faster?
But there's no other explanation.
Thinking about it, have I ever been this focused recently?
I've never really concentrated on online games; they were just a way to kill time.
"Student Joon-hyung Lee? Have you finished, you lazy bastard?"
"Me? Oh, not yet!"
"Hmm."
I lied without realizing it.
If I said, 'Yes, I've finished. You're all idiots' I'd definitely attract unwanted attention.
The professor leaned against the podium with a serious look.
It was as if he was thinking, 'How am I supposed to deal with these idiots...'
The professor pondered for a moment, then stepped out from behind the podium and walked towards us.
"Hmm..."
It seemed like he wanted to see how the students were solving the problem.
I hurriedly pretended to scribble with my pen.
I had already solved it!
"What part don't you understand, you dumbass?"
"This... the triangular equation, I don't get it."
"Really? Do you understand the coordinate system of X and Y forces, you fucking moron?"
"Honestly, not really..."
The professor immediately started focusing on one student, marking him closely.
I bought some time.
Today's class might end up being a free ride.
I was supposed to go shopping with Yoo-in Ha after class anyway...
'Scribble scribble.'
My thoughts drifted back to poker.
Poker... Did playing poker suddenly clear my head?
Or would any activity that requires similar focus have the same effect?
Or maybe it's the underlying sense of urgency that if I didn't perform well, I'd be screwed by Juha?
...I can't figure it out exactly.
Maybe I'm just getting ahead of myself.
"Do you understand now, you piece of shit?"
"Ah... yes... Professor..."
The student's vague response echoed.
The professor, seemingly unsatisfied, started walking again.
I kept scribbling, pretending I hadn't finished yet.
"Hmm..."
The professor stopped beside me.
He bent over as if to look at my solution.
Suddenly, I felt nervous.
What if I got everything wrong?
"Oh, student Joon-hyung Lee?"
"Yes?"
The professor spoke with an excited voice.
"You've solved it correctly? How the fuck did you do it?"
...Uh... I just used my brain.
It felt like he was asking, 'How did you solve this with that dumb head of yours just days ago? This is fucking surprising...'
"I just... felt like I understood today's lecture well."
"Is that so?"
Unintentionally, other students' gazes turned towards me.
With the professor's first praise, it was inevitable.
I felt myself shrink under the attention.
Drawing attention always makes me nervous...
"Very good."
The professor chuckled as he walked towards another student, looking for more correct answers.
But it seemed there were no significant gains.
The professor, who had been laughing, now looked serious again.
"Student Joon-hyung?"
"Yes, yes."
What now? I suddenly felt anxious.
"Could you come up and explain the solution from your perspective? Can you explain it in detail?"
"Me?"
Once again, I drew attention.
"Yes... let's start with the premise... We write down that the total sum of forces, Sigma F, equals zero. Then, as the professor mentioned, we calculate the total forces in the X and Y directions..."
Cold sweat trickled down my back.
How long has it been since I was called to the front of the class?
With 8 pairs of eyes on me, I felt like I was sweating buckets.
"Let's start by calculating A1... Since A1 is directed to the left, X is negative, and Y is positive."
"Good, good. Continue."
"A2 is directed to the right, and by the triangular equation, X is calculated with cosine, and Y with sine."
I repeated my solution while scribbling on the whiteboard.
Oh my god... I feel like I'm going to faint...
"We sum up the forces in the X and Y directions separately.
Finally, we calculate Bg, the downward force, where g is the gravitational acceleration, 9.8 m/s^2."
That's it.
I put down the pen, feeling my chest warm up.
The professor clapped with a broad smile.
"Perfect, student Joon-hyung Lee. Did everyone else understand? That was a clean solution."
Everyone nodded, but not because they understood; it was just a customary nod.
I felt my face flush. It felt weird to be praised for something trivial.
"You're good at this, student Joon-hyung. Looking at your book, you've solved other examples correctly too. I thought you weren't focusing, but I was wrong."
"Ah... yes... haha..."
I felt exposed.
In high school, when I was called up to solve problems correctly, the girl bullies would smirk.
'Hey, Joon-hyung. You're smart, huh?'
'Joon-hyung, must feel good to be praised, right?'
'This guy looks like he's grinning from ear to ear.'
'Do you like it? Do you like it? Huh? Do you like it?'
They'd tap my feet with theirs, giggling, and I'd turn red.
That memory just came back.
"Let's have student Joon-hyung teach his friends here. It's often easier to understand when a friend explains rather than a professor, right?"
"Uh... yes... yes..."
Damn, not just attracting attention, but now I've got a mission.
Please, no, Professor!!! You must have been a nerd once too!!! Stop the friendly fire!!!
"Students, feel free to ask student Joon-hyung anything. We learn faster when we study together. Studying isn't meant to be done alone. And it's a great way to make friends. How beautiful is university life?"
Kill me...
I clasped my hands, shedding tears of frustration.
After standing at the podium for nearly 10 minutes, I barely made it back to my seat.
"Let's take a 10-minute break. Feel free to get some water or take a walk."
"Yes-."
As soon as the professor left, most students rushed out.
Only about 3 or 4 remained.
I shook my shirt slightly, feeling like I could breathe again.
That was close.