I waited anxiously at Jace's car, hoping he wouldn't be with Mirae. I had informed Emily that I would get a ride with a friend. If Jace refused to let me go with him, I would understand completely; I didn't really want to be alone with him, and I was fine with walking home.
Jace noticed me, looking annoyed, but he didn't say anything. He just unlocked his car. "Jace, can I talk to you?" I said hastily as he opened his car door. "I need to tell you what's on my mind."
But he ignored me and closed the car. "Could you give me a ride home? Please?" I asked, but he started the car and drove off.
It was useless. I looked up at the sky, the dark grey clouds rolling in, and the wind shifting, becoming colder. I started walking fast, trying to beat the incoming rain.
I put in my earphones and started listening to music as I walked home. It was quite a distance, but nothing I hadn't done before. I could call Emily or Dad, but my soul called for solitude. I felt numb, regretting all my decisions and wondering if I would ever stop making mistakes. I wished I were sensible enough to make the right choice. It started to drizzle, and I began to walk faster, but it was no use. It began to pour.
The rain came down hard and fast, reminiscent of the first time I met Jace. I closed my eyes and stood still, thinking back to that day when I met him, the day I became infatuated by him because he was intriguing enough to capture me wholly so I could escape my problems. I remembered the jacket he lifted over my head; no one had ever done anything like that for me. I let out an icy breath and opened my eyes.
It almost felt as if I were dreaming when I found him standing in front of me. My heart began to beat faster.
I looked up at him, his grey eyes studying me.
He took me by the wrist and led me to his car, opening the door for me. I reluctantly climbed in.
We drove in silence for a few moments until I parted my cold lips to speak. "I was never ready for you; I hurt you because I was in pain, insecure because I didn't love myself. I was in a dark place, and I chose you to be my distraction." He let me speak. He was quiet, and I didn't know what he was thinking.
"I'm really sorry about everything; it's okay if you never speak to me again. But I need to say these things so that I can bury this." My breath low, I swallowed. It was okay if he didn't ever respond. I didn't think either of us deserved one another. We were just too toxic at the end of the day.
He pulled off at my house. I looked over at him; he stared distantly at his dashboard. It was still coming down. I opened the door, but he pulled me back. His damp hair was brushed back, skin echoing paleness with hints of blue, resembling a painting from the Renaissance.
In one swift movement, he reached over to close the door, his cheek lightly brushing mine. He returned to his seat, looking outside the window. "Wait until the rain stops," he commanded, his voice sounding sweet, as I hungered and thirst for his musical voice.
I let out a breath that I hadn't realized I'd been holding in.
Still, he wouldn't look at me. He unbuttoned his wet shirt and threw it in the back, revealing his undertop.
He looked over at me. "Your lips are blue." He looked at the backseat. "I don't have anything," he uttered silently.
"It's okay," my heart pounded.
He watched me for a moment. "I can't forgive you," he admitted. My heart dropped to my stomach.
I swallowed. "I understand," I forced.
"You're not going to inquire why?" he asked, a trace of surprise in his voice.
I shook my head. "No," I looked into his cold grey eyes.
He shrugged. "Good," he looked away, breaking from our gaze.
I frowned. "Is something bothering you?" I asked.
"Yes," he nodded. "You're bothering me," he responded, ice in his expression laced with disdain.
"I'm trying to apologize to you, Jace," I moved closer to him, urging him for forgiveness.
"Don't you see?" He turned his head in my direction.
"I don't know what you are trying to tell me, Jace," I swallowed as he was inches away from me.
He took a deep breath and released it. "The rain stopped," he answered. "You should go." He looked down at me, and I could feel his warm breath brushing me.
I impulsively leaned in to kiss him, not having any self-control as I pulled him closer and closer, wanting him even closer as I pressed my lips against his. He took me in and passionately kissed me as if he was waiting for me to tip the iceberg so he could come crashing down, as we both desperately fought our urges.
But he pulled back. "No," he shook his head. "No, I'm with Mirae." Jace got out of the car and left me humiliated. Why couldn't I just control myself? But I didn't care. I didn't care; I just wanted him. I had never wanted anything this bad.
I got out and followed him. "You kissed me back," I reminded him.
"Yes, I know," Jace shook his head, "do you know how bad this will look in the public's eyes? They'll see me as a cheater, and I'll never get a job again, and then I won't be able to escape my grandfather." Jace blurted.
I stepped back in shock. I nodded. "Your grandfather," I murmmed my heart breaking in the process. "I'm sorry, and I'll leave you alone from now on. But I just want to tell you this—"
He cut me off with a wave of a hand. "You've said enough. If you really want my forgiveness, then just stay away from me." He got in his car and drove off.
I began to sob uncontrollably. I love him so much, and I could have been with him if I wasn't so stupid. I fell to my knees.
"Mirae," a voice called out.
I frowned as I looked at him, coming to my aid, lifting me up from the ground. "Let's get you inside," he urged.
I shook my head. "In Jace's house? No," I uttered, feeling sick to my stomach as I was dealing with the repercussions of my actions.
"No, Jace doesn't live here anymore. He moved out yesterday actually. To a penthouse in the city," Dorian elaborated.
I swallowed. "Oh." I moved over to the damp sidewalk, feeling as if someone just ripped my heart out from my chest. Jace wasn't my neighbor anymore?
I began to cry. "Mirae," he sat beside me. "Don't cry." He patted my back.
"My name is not Mirae; it's Lucy, Lucy Stone. I'm sorry that I lied before but could you stop calling me by that name." I yelled, feeling defeated.
He just stares at me for a while. "Lucy, Lucy Stone, it is then." He teases and I look at him for a while and burst out into laughter.
"Wow." I dry my eyes and stand up. "You're rich, thanks but I'm going to head inside." I jab my finger at my house.
He stands
up, "You live there?" He raises his eyebrows in dismay. "You're the girl next door..."