In her heart, Eli wondered what had happened to Yorris. His brain, actions, and heart are out of sync.
"Just friends? No friends have sex with their friends. We are not friends with benefits."
"Yes but..."
Eli's hand rose to silence Yorris's mouth and it worked, Yorris remained silent like he was being smothered by the police at the crime scene so couldn't defend himself. He is proven guilty.
"No need to talk at length about feelings, you act as if my feelings matter."
Eli snorted then took the potato chips and gave them to Yorris. Initially, Yorris was fixated on seeing the chips, not knowing how to respond, but in the end, he opened his mouth to receive a bite of the chips. Yorris' feelings are not clear, what is clear just is work and how to avoid problems. If already faced with a problem, Yorris is for a way out to solve it.
During his inner struggles, Yorris found another alternative, which he immediately conveyed.
"Walk with me first. I can't make promises I can't keep but we are indeed married. Let's live like a normal couple and enjoy it. Your feelings and mine are important but the thing is I feel like I'm playing you because I don't know how I feel myself. My life is just like water go with the flow, maybe it's a kind of numbness because I'm used to having whatever I want."
"Hah."
Eli scratched her head. "Even starting this conversation is weird. We're stuck and this is the way out you're proposing." Eli paused. "But it's okay, let's give it a try and it starts with us opening up to each other. What happened at your meeting without me?"
Eli stared at Yorris, not wanting to miss even a small movement.
***
Yorris had no intention of opening up and he didn't want to do that, but it was a different story when Eli seemed to want to get involved even though Yorris was sure she couldn't help him. Yorris hasn't touched his feelings but rather maybe he could pour out his thoughts as long as Eli was willing to become a 'garbage dump' for him.
According to Yorris, Eli was weak and had no power, Eli would only be a burden that Yorris had to give protection to because of the contents of the marriage agreement. Well in the end Yorris wanted to 'share' a bit.
Before speaking Yorris sighed. "Cindy's family turned out to be the mafia. I was at a loss thinking about how to deal with them. Her daddy wanted to control me."
"Just manipulate," said Eli firmly. The way her eyes see is like that of an experienced woman who often manipulated people as if it wasn't something difficult.
Yorris doubted Eli's words but grinned instead. On second thought their thoughts were the same.
"We are of one mind."
"Then what are you worried about?"
"Safety Mom and those closest to me. Well, I don't have to worry so much."
Yorris smiled faintly, his hand took Eli's potato chips and ate them. Eli observed Yorris' little activity.
"Don't worry too much about something when you can protect." Eli paused. "What do they want you to do?"
Yorris shrugged. "Cindy is coming with us to look for houseplants and wild plants."
"Oh." Eli snorted, Cindy used a sneaky way to get close to Yorris by pressing him.
"I think he still loves you."
"What is loving? Indirectly she declared war, she did not want to admit that she had acted wrongly and apologized."
Yorris's lips pursed as he rolled his eyes lazily. For the second time, he took the chips and Eli was sure Yorris would continue to pick up her potato chips.
Without saying much Eli gave Yorris a packet of chips, which the man accepted innocently like a child, while Eli took several other packets of chips. Eli opened two packets at once so they wouldn't be fighting over the chips.
"Until when will you deny, make it something impossible possible. Think like that."
"For example?"
"Use all kinds of possibilities, you also think from various angles. She must be taken by our bait so that behaving like this."
Yorris's brows knit at the thought of Eli's words, considering several incidents, is not impossible Eli's words were true. Yorris also wants to think broadly about addressing something.
"Okay, I understand, and thank you."
Eli smiled, Yorris thanked her and it sounded like fun. Eli was happy that Yorris was being kind so he became adorable in Eli's eyes. Besides, Yorris is sometimes still pure behind his annoying attitude.
Yorris wasn't particularly cruel.
"Oh, there's something I want you to do. Will you help me?"
"What's that?"
Eli lowered head to channel the increasing stress that had to be overcome immediately so that would not sink into a pool of mud with a heavy stress motive. When felt ready, Eli lifted her head and spoke. "Please read my novel and put it on the bookshelf."
"Eh?"
Yorris's forehead was contorted in confusion, not understanding why Eli suddenly asked him to read her work. After being scolded for 'approaching' her work he was told to read it in the end. That's something unnatural.
"Why?" Yorris was curious, his head tilted in confusion.
"Times are changing and I'm not a famous writer."
Eli again lowered her head deeper to hide her frustrated face and at the same time strengthened her mentality to ask for Yorris's help, whether he would obey or not. Eli quite believed Yorris might will to help her. Eli had never given up though Yorris make fun of her.
"So?"
"Um... That..."
Eli's index fingers pressed against each other. Eli's eyes looked the other way so as not to meet Yorris's eyes and then her mouth began to mutter something Yorris didn't understand. Yorris thought that Eli was cute. Both of them thought separately, Eli was trapped in her world full of grumbling that never came out.
"Say it quickly," Yorris said, getting irritated. Tired of waiting for Eli who didn't speak either.
*****