" Understood."
Amon nodded as he shook her hand. Philomel narrowed her eyes at him, still unconvinced that he truly understands their agreement.
" No matter how much you, beg or cry later to bring him along. I'm not going to let you. I'm going to leave that baby at the closest doorstep and I'll drag your ass through that evil mountain if I have to. "
Philomel explain further, trying to drill the fact into his head but Amon stopped paying attention to her as soon as he shook her hand. Cradling Little One in his hands with a huge grin on his face.
"I'm going to find the perfect foster family, a million times better than the mother who abandoned you. A family that loves you so much, you'll never need or want closure even if you find out you were adopted. Just wait! I'll make sure you'll want for nothing more for the rest of your life."
Amon telepathically told Little One even though he knew that Little One wouldn't even get the message and if he did, the baby wouldn't know what it means. All Amon could count on was his energy, sending as much hope for a bright future to the little bundle of joy in his arms.
Philomel let out an annoyed sigh when she noticed Amon wasn't even paying attention to her.
"He's getting too attached to a baby that he only met last night. Any longer and he might be determined to be a single father then how can he help me through this mission? If he becomes attached to this baby would he be able to go through with killing the Messiah? What if when he looks at the Messiah, he sees only Little One's face and loses resolve?
I'll be dammed if I have to go through that torment again! "
Philomel mentally cursed as she recalls last night by that bridge holding Little One in her arms as she peer over the rails. How hard it was to look at Little One. His cute chubby face and those bright blue eyes that were staring right through her soul. Eyes that were filled with curiosity and wonder. Eyes that didn't understand anything but the love and warmth of another. Eyes that were so trusting just because Philomel holding him so tenderly in her arms.
"He trusts me because I am holding him. He trusts me just because he feels my warmth. He reaches out to me, not caring that I'm a dark elf, not caring about my past or what I'm about to do. He reaches out to me not because I'm the only person here. He's reaching out to me because he wants my love."
Philomel broke at just the thought, her heart screamed at her as her mind tried to ruin the truth with unnecessary logic.
" He only wants your love because he's a dumb baby who trusts anyone who holds him tenderly! He isn't crying because he's just a dumb baby who doesn't even understand what you're trying to do! He's just like a puppy, dumb, cute, and needy for attention! Stop thinking otherwise. He is nothing more than just another animal. Just like that chicken, you cried when you had to kill it but it filled your tummy with yummy fired chicken and you got over it. This would be just the same! You cry a minute after killing it then your whole tribe cheers you as a hero and you'll get over it. Do it! Do it for your tribe!!"
Philomel found herself screaming at herself like, she was a totally different person. But then again, who wouldn't want to be a totally different person when faced with such a task? Had enough of the battle of her heart and her mind, enough of the devil over her shoulder and the angel, enough of everything even herself. Her hands lifted the baby over the rail of the bridge.
" NOOOO!"
Amon screamed. Philomel closes her eyes tightly as a single tear rolls down her cheek and she drops the baby. The second she did so, her eyes snapped open, her hands trembling, wanting to spring forward and grab the baby. Philomel watched in terror as Little One smiled at her. He smiled at her showing all his little gums as his eyes sparkle such a beautiful blue. Philomel stares in shock as her gaping lips tremble in horror. Her mind barely registered Amon's shadow as he leap after the infant.
" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
She screamed so hard and loud that her voice gave up halfway and it ended up as a silent scream. Philomel fell to her knees, tears spilling from her eyes and onto the pavement. Her eyes still staring at the concrete, still able to picture the smiling baby's face as he fell toward his death. A death she caused.
"I did it?"
Her mind questions not wanting to accept reality, not wanting to accept the guilt. Unfortunately, it was hers to keep whether she liked it or not.
" Never again, please don't make me do it again. Please I'm begging you. Please don't make me do it again."
Philomel found her whole body and soul screaming at her as the image of the smiling baby haunted her.
" Mel?"
Philomel finally snaps back to reality and turns to Amon who was staring at her with a worried expression.
" Are you okay? Why are you crying?"
Amon asked gently as he cups her face and wipes away her tear with his thumb.
" Promise me something."
Philomel grab the hand that was holding her cheek. Amon was surprised at the gesture and his hand jolted a bit before relaxing in her hand. Amon was slightly reluctant to promise her anything else, since his last promise, ended up with him, holding the fate of the whole world in his hands, along with the life of a Messiah. A scary choice that Amon had been ignoring as much as he could, not wanting to be left with such a decision. But he knew, Philomel would hold him to his promise, and she was a very determined young lady, who so far got want she set out for.
He didn't have the heart to tell Philomel, that he has been silently wishing, praying that this wild goose chase, would never end. Just so, he would never have to make the decision. Even though, he knew Philomel missed her family a lot and wanted to go home to skin some sort of snake? Amon never really understood that metaphor and at this point in time, he really rather not be dragged into any more of Philomel's affairs. The last metaphor she used terrible beast ended up being a little baby, the child of a goddess. For all, he knows that snake metaphor could be something worst like killing puppies or something. Seriously don't know, what could be worst than killing a baby, and bringing about the end of a world.
" What sort of promise...?"
Amon asks skeptically.
" And you better not be using any kind of metaphors like calling a baby a terrible monster. Be honest with me, don't I deserve to fully understand what I'm getting myself into before promising?"
Amon quickly added, Philomel's hand drops from her cheek to her lap, dragging Amon's hand along with it. She could understand why Amon no longer trust her, even though she saved his life, just last night, but even so, confirming it was still a little bit hurtful.
" Very well, I shall be honest with you."
Philomel said with a solemn tone as she let go of Amon's hand, pulls her father's handkerchief from her pocket, and wiped away her tears. Finding some comfort that she still has something from her parents. Even though it was just a simple handkerchief, woven by her mother from common wool, with simple curving blue lines and inch from the edges, creating a beautiful border, hand embroidered by her father.
At the corner of the handkerchiefs was her father's name "Anubis" embroidered like a beautiful signature at the bottom in her father's favourite sky blue string and double knot. She couldn't help but find herself smiling at that little handkerchief, a quality creation from both her parents, just like the clothes she was wearing now.
" You really missed them, huh?"
Amon questioned when he noticed her staring at her handkerchief and remembered her father was some sort of seamstress or seamster. He could never remember the term but he knew it had something to do with making clothes.
" Knowing that I might never see them again if I fail this mission and the way I left... made my heart truly appreciate and remember how much I love them. Makes my heart yearn even more to see them soon even though I know the odds are against us."
Philomel scoffed at her own words finding her luck so terrible that it became ridiculous and somehow funny to her. She out, of the million, of billion people in the world to have such terrible luck. One of the great joys of being Philomel.
" I understand what you're trying to do and it's very noble of you but please, whatever you do... don't get attached to the child. It would only make your decision for this world and the Messiah, a harder choice to make. "
Amon found himself gasping as Philomel said the D word. Philomel's solemn expression changes into a confused one when she saw how Amon reacted.
" Don't say that word. Don't remind me, I don't wanna remember."
Amon blurted out as he placed Little One on his lap and covered his ear. He truly believes by doing so he could ignore the problem at hand.
" What word? Attached?"
Philomel questioned, now seeming curious about what word could make him react like this. Completely oblivious that he was like this because of her.
" No."
" Messiah?"
" No, no."
" Choice?"
" Getting warmer."
" You can't be serious."
" I am! I am completely serious. Never say that word to me."
" You're afraid of the word decision? Seriously?"
" La la la la la la la I'm not listening. "
Amon childishly sang as he cover his ears. Philomel couldn't help but burst out in laughter at how ridiculous this was.
" *laughing* If you're so afraid of the word then you should leave all the deeeee. "
Philomel dragged the word as she grinned at Amon.
" No! There's no way I'm leaving the decision-making to you!"
Amon stated with an angry expression.
" Oh! You said it! You said the D word!"
Philomel chimed as she pointed a finger at him.
" You're enjoying this, too much."
" Aw, come on! You gotten admit that it was too cute not to tease."
Amon looked at her with a blank face.
" Oh, haha, very funny."
Amon reply with a sarcastic tone but it didn't stop Philomel from giggling at him.
" There are some decisions, I don't wish to make, and there are some, where I wish you would at least consult me, before making instead of hiding the issue and contemplating it by yourself. I may not have been assigned this mission but you have chosen me to assist you with it. So, let me. Let me assist you in any way I can. Just give me the chance to do so."
Amon firmly informed. Philomel grew silent once again being reminded how one-sided this partnership was.
" Very well, will keep you updated as long as you do the same. Any choice we make, we shall make it together."
Philomel gestures for another handshake to seal the deal. Amon without any hesitation shook her hand.
" Seriously thou try not to get too attached to Little One. He wouldn't be safe during this journey."
Philomel warned again with a pointing finger.
" That would be hard but I promise to try not to get too attached."
Amon nodded agreeing with her. Philomel reply with a grin as she stood up, swing her satchel over her shoulder, pick up her veil, and hung it around her neck like a shawl.
" Shall we get going, partner?"
Amon stood up, standing next to her with Little One in his arms.
" After you, partner."
Amon grinned as he offered her his arm, and gestured toward the forest like he was about to escort her into a grand ballroom. Philomel couldn't help but laugh at such a gesture as she wrap her hand around his arm, and allowed him to escort her, into the dark forest with a little spring in her step.
The morning sunlight intense its glow as it slowly shifted into a blazing afternoon sun, highlighting their backs for a moment before the tree shades block the sun from reaching them.
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