"Request for readmission to the guild from Swift"
Just reading the paper's title brings my headache to a full-blown migraine. Swift was an up-and-coming party permanently banned from the guild for falsifying records. They started out adventuring in the capital, but when their growth wasn't as fast as they liked, they moved to this town to gain a reputation. The only places for hunting are the plains with very low-leveled monsters in small numbers and the forest, which has a combination of low-leveled monsters and the occasional high-leveled monster. They couldn't make a living from hunting the monsters on the plains and were too afraid to go deep into the forest, so they made several attempts to level up by lying about what types of monsters they were killing. They tried to intimidate the guild staff into approving their promotion, so I banned them. They even went as far as to ambush me when I left the guild building once, but I let them off easy with some broken bones.
While debating if I should just throw the document away without reading it, I hear a knock at the door.
'Bang, bang, bang.'
"Sir, you can't go in there." The muffled voice of my assistant comes from the other side of the door.
"Watch me!" The door bursts open, and I take a deep breath to collect myself.
"Jezabel!" The blond-haired man storms into the room. I put on a fake smile and address him.
"Baron Armstrong, so good to see you. Unfortunately, I'm not taking any visitors right now."
"Drop it; I don't have time to bullshit with you." I have no problem with his request, so I drop my smile.
"Very well."
"I want Ironhead fired!"
I don't respond. I know it will piss him off more than anything I could say.
"They are a threat to the lives of the students, and I don't want my son getting injured."
"He wasn't even in the expedition."
"Well, he's in the class now."
"If that's the case, then I'm sure you have a signed petition."
"I do." He places the papers on the table in front of me. I pick up the form while staring him in the eyes.
"Hmm, let me look these over." I pretend to read the papers while maintaining eye contact with him. His teeth clench as I flip through the forms without even looking at them. "I'll consider your concerns, but your petition is denied."
I tear the papers apart and crumple them before throwing them in the waste bin.
"You dare treat a Noble this way?"
"I'm sorry, Baron. If you have an issue with my behavior, you can send a formal complaint to the Guild Headquarters." A cruel smile spreads across my face. The Baron knows as well as I do that the Guild Headquarters doesn't want anything to do with this branch.
"I'll remember this." With those words, he quickly leaves.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't stop him." Hugo stands at the door, looking apologetic.
"Don't mind it. He just wants to have Ironhead disbanded so the party he's sponsoring will have more influence in the guild." Hugo walks back out and closes the door behind him. Once I'm sure he's gone, I open the top drawer of my desk. I pull out some herbs to help with my migraine and a bottle of whiskey. The herbs have been ground up in a small pouch. I take a mouthful and wash it down with several gulps of whiskey. The light coming in from the windows makes my head hurt even more, so I draw the blinds closed and light a candle. In the darkness of my office, I shut my eyes, rubbing my temples until the medicine takes effect. After a few minutes, the pounding in my skull subsides, and I get back to the paperwork.
"Get up, sleepyhead! Happy Meowrning!" Natalie opens the curtains in my bedroom, and the blinding light of day pours through the window. I groggily open my eyes and see her smiling face.
"Could you do me a favor and stab me to death?"
"Um, that's not very happy. I know, hugs will help!" Natalie dives into my bed and wraps her arms around me.
"Natalie, get off me."
"Not until mew say my name right."
"Natalie, please."
"Nyope." She tightens her grip as she responds, and she begins purring lightly.
"Fine, Nyatalie," I say with a sigh.
"Nyay!" She jumps out of bed and takes my covers with her.
"Goddammit."
"Let's get up! Time fur the best day ever!" Natalie spins around in circles while humming to herself. I roll out of bed and stretch.
"I made your favorite breakfast!" She drags me to the kitchen before I have time to change out of my kitten pajamas. Natalie buys all my clothes for me, so every pair I own has pictures of cats on them. "Tada!"
A fish-themed breakfast is laid out on the table. The main course is fried fish with several sides to complement it.
"Um, Natalie. I told you I don't really like fish." I turn to her as I'm speaking and realize she isn't listening. Her eyes sparkle with drool leaking out of one side of her mouth.
"Doesn't it look dewicious?"
"I guess." I sigh while sitting at the table and put some of each course on my plate. Natalie is looking at me expectantly. I take a bite of the fried fish, and she moves closer to me while smiling widely.
"So, how's the fewd?"
"It's fine."
'Sniff, sniff.'
I look up and see Natalie's eyes tearing up. She looks like she's about to cry.
"It's fine?" I can feel a pang of guilt rising in my stomach.
"I mean, it's finely cooked. It's really good."
"You mean it?" Her expression brightens a bit, but I can still see tears at the corners of her eyes.
"Of course. It's great." I fake a smile and put a big bite of food in my mouth. She wipes away her tears and smiles brightly.
"Nyay!"
"Why don't you sit down and eat with me?"
'Gasp.'
Natalie places her hands over her mouth.
"I can?"
"Sure, food is better with friends." She sits down and starts eating before I even finish speaking. I slowly eat as I watch her shovel food into her mouth. Once I'm done, I place my plate on the counter and walk to my room to change.
[It tastes like ash in my mouth, but damn, is it filling.]
I swallow the last bite of food in my mouth and put on my guild master uniform. On the way out the door, I see Natalie finishing up the food on the table that could have easily fed four.
'Buuurp.'
She leans back in her chair and pats her distended belly. A satisfied smile grows neatly on her face.
"Goodbye, Natalie."
"Oh, wait! Let me grab your–"
Clack.