Lately I have been correcting some old chapters. There are no plot changes there I simply added necessary things and removed or fixed things that didn't fit me. But it does not change the plot in any way, so there is no need to read them from scratch, however, where there are major changes to the chapter with a note ( Modifications) .
I also decided to rewrite the previous chapter because it was terrible in my eyes, however, lately I have little time, but nevertheless there will be a rewrite of that chapter.
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Blake pov.
' What should I say ?'
I think looking at Yang whose eyes are red and puffy as she obviously trying not to cry.
Blake : " Don't worry about it so much"
I say while looking at Yang face, which she tries to keep without crying.
Yang : " How can I not care about something like that?"
Yang says as a single tear flows from her eyes.
Blake :" Believe me Lappdumb is strange, but if she likes you then no matter how you hurt her she won't leave you."
' I speak from experience if Lappland gets attached she then will not let you go .'
Yang : " Thanks Blake but I threw up on her, it doesn't affect whether she likes me or not, it affects how she perceives me."
Says Yang as she bure her face in the blanket while letting out a hopeless sigh.
' I could ignore it and leave Yang alone with her thoughts '
' Yang will probably be too embarrassed to show herself in front of Lappland again. This way...'
' Why this is so annoying. Helping her is the end between me and Lappy.'
'I decided right?'
Thinking about it I look at Yang who has known Lappland for two days and is already crying for mistakes as if Lappland has been her love for years.
Blake : " Even if Lappland doesn't like you why are you crying so hard for her? "
Yang : " I am not crying".
Yang says while her face is hidden in the bed sheets which makes her voice muffled.
Yang is really serious about what she feels. It's hard to tell how many feelings someone has for someone until something happens. Just like Lappland suffered for me for years and now Yang who really takes it seriously however, she still screwed it up in a big way .
Blake : "What would happen if Lappland wasn't interested in you".
I ask looking at Yang.
Yang : " Then I would do everything to get her interested in me".
Blake : "Like some kind of pervert ?"
Yang : "No, I wouldn't have crossed some boundaries, I would have just been with her trying to bring us closer ".
Blake : " What if..."
Yang : "If she's uninterested I'll try to befriend her, even though I'll probably need a few days to cool off first. However, even as her friend, I would not stop trying to get her as a girlfriend. But what has happened yesterday must have been disgusting in her eyes and I will be lucky if we become friends."
Hearing her I know that she cannot fake these feelings. Yesterday I couldn't be sure that she wasn't lying about her feelings however now it's her tears that are her evidence for which I have no arguments unless Yang is such a good actress .
Blake : " I will help you with Lappy".
I say looking at Yang who has pulled her head out of the blanket to look at me in surprise.
Blake : "You thought that after what I told you yesterday, I would help you ? "
I ask, however, looking at Yang's face I can see that she thought so.
Blake : " No, Yesterday I only let you to try win Lappland heart ".
Saying this I look at Yang when a gentle smile appears on her face.
Yang :" Thanks Blake however, what happened yesterday cannot be fixed, it was a total destruction of my person in her eye."
Hearing this, I know that it's now my business to help her get through that unfortunate first meeting.
Blake : " When I first met Lappland my parents introduced her to me as my playmate. You know I was one of those quiet kids who didn't seek friendships , I had other activities at the time ".
' In fact from a very young age exactly from the moment I learned to write I participated in the peaceful protests that my parents created, I was so absorbed by it that I didn't see the point in looking for friends .
Blake :" Wanting to make Lappland my friends , I told her a joke which, as I think about it now, was terrible. However, she laughed at it. But at the time her laughter frightened me which made me run away from her, but to her it apparently seemed like I was playing with her.
Blake : "When she was chasing me at the time I accidentally hit her. Lappland was very weak as she was directly after treatment, and that hit made her lose consciousness. I panicked and ran away from the yard leaving her that day in the rain ."
I say recalling that first unfortunate encounter of ours.
Blake :" After that I avoided her nevertheless Lappland followed me like a shadow. She wanted to play with me, but seeing that I was engrossed in something else she began to imitate me. "
Blake :" Over time I opened up to Lappland It was through her that I met my other friends. She gave me more than anyone could give me even though at our first meeting I left her alone . "
I say as I remember her sacrifices and the time she gave me. I remember teaching her how to draw banners so we could go to protests together.
Hearing my story Yang despite the sadness in her eyes looks at me with a grateful smile.
Yang : " You were small then, we are adults, and this situation is so embarrassing. You know I just worry how Lappland will look at me now ".
Ynag says with a sigh.
Blake : " Lappland is not simple even I don't understand her sometimes. She sometimes has outbursts of completely different emotions from anger to joy to nervous breakdowns so I can't tell you myself what she thinks about the situation . "
Hearing my words about Lappland's emotional vacillations, Yang looks at me but she does not interrupt me.
Blake : "However, I saw what happened that day, and while a normal person wouldn't have come out of that car alive, probably even our childhood friend Hazel would have come out with a black eye after such a situation."
Blake :" But you? Lappland didn't do anything to you , or rather she wiped the vomit off herself using your hair but I believe it's not so bad as what might have happened . "
I say when Yang looks at me with her eyes wide open as she grabs her golden hair with horror on her face . Yang looked thoughtful as she sighed and a wide smile returned to her face .
Yang :" Thank you Blake, sometimes I can really do stupid things, like this drinking beyond my capacity, I deserve to have my hair used as a towel "
Yang says when the cheerful and energetic character returns to her.
Blake : " Don't worry about it because I can see that you care about Lappland however let me warn you ".
I say when my face becomes completely serious.
Blake :" Lappland experienced a lot of bad things, I myself don't know what because my parents didn't tell me anything despite the fact that they knew something. Whatever happened to her left her with scars in her mind and body so deep that they have not healed so far. "
I pause for a moment and look at Yang. What I tell her now is everything I know myself and something Lappland never tells anyone.
Yang :" That's where her "emotional instability " comes from and why she is so brutal ."
Asks Yang looking at me apparently, she saw it for herself.
Blake :" Yes, and it's bad with her so don't ever ask Lappland about what happened to her, don't ask about her parents and other such things related to her early childhood."
Blake :" Because if Lappland loses her brakes she can become very dangerous. But don't be afraid of Lappland be afraid of what she hides inside ."
Looking at Yang some old memory comes to my mind. Bodies of SDC people scattered on the floor, bitten, scratche and in all of this I only ten years old looking at the awakening of something terrible .
' It was the first time I saw such violence, the first time I saw so much blood in one place, and the first time I saw Lappland crying .'
' In my eyes Lappland was strong and always defended me from others. She was amazing and this amazing person cried in front of me for the first time'
That day I discovered a part of who I love. Her sambelanc did not exist to kill grimm, Lappland sambelanc exist to kill people this showed me the true disposition of Lappland which has always been blood, tears and unequal struggle .
'What everyone sees is my Lappdumb, what I see is Lappland hidden from the eyes of others.'
Yang : "Blake are you there ? "
I am pulled out of my thoughts by Yang who waves her hand in front of my face. Looking at her I see that I must have drifted away.
Blake : " I drifted off?"
Yang : "Yes for about two minutes, are you okay? "
Asks Yang however I don't answer her question and continue what I said.
Blake :" What I'm asking you is simple, don't fuck it up. I'm not saying treat her like an egg just be there for her when she needs it, be understanding and be prepared because once you cross the line there is no way out without hurting one of you."
I say looking at Yang and I'm not going to lecture her because I fucked it up myself. What I'm afraid of now is that she will screw it up too.
Yang :" Don't worry I will take care of your friend after all I am Yang Xiao Long. "
Says Yang with a smirk showing her biceps and it's all as if she's uttering some kind of oath . Hearing her I smile knowing the determination on her face.
Blake : "I hope so because if you hurt Lappland I will find you".
I say completely seriously to Yang who stopped smiling.
'Now Lappland has a chance to find the happiness she deserves'.
Finishing my thoughts my attention is drawn to Yang's outfit which has been uncovered again .
' You can't call her a girl she is already a woman'.
'Lappland's clothes are mostly too small for me but for her.'
Blake : " Would you like to change?"
I ask because looking at her I feel warmth on my face so I'm probably blushing again.
Yang :" Yes please"
Yang says as she covers herself with the blanket again apparently she is embarrassed too by this situation. I don't prolong and I get up to bring her clothes but before I go too far Yang asks .
Yang : " By the way where is Lappland? ".
Hearing her question I turn to her and say.
Blake : " She went to the doctor "