My eyes slowly peel open as I hear the soft sound of pans banging together in the kitchen. I glance over to see Aiden no longer sitting in front of the couch and the sun has long since started setting in the sky. I must have slept for a long time. I feel rested. The weakness from earlier is gone, but the feeling that something is missing is ever present in my chest. I still haven't heard a word from him, so I try to reach out to him again through our bond. I can still faintly feel him, but he doesn't respond.
I swing my feet off the couch and carefully stand up as I look towards the kitchen where the noise is coming from. There are multiple voices in the kitchen and since Brandon and Aiden are the only ones who stay in the house, I have no idea who is here. As I head towards the kitchen, the talking slows to a stop. I inhale the scents and determine it's Mary, Brandon, and Aiden in the kitchen, but I have no idea why they would stop talking when I come towards the room… unless they are talking about me for some reason. I eye them suspiciously as I step into the room before shrugging it off.
"What's going on? Aiden, I told you to wake up when they got back, not let me sleep," I scold him as I slide into the seat beside him at the island. The two of us are facing Mary and Brandon - who can't seem to keep their hands off each other. I smile softly because I get it. When Mason gets back, I highly doubt I'll let him out of my sight for a while. His dad and Jason can take care of the pack for a few days because as soon as he walks through those doors, he's all mine. No exceptions.
"I told him not to wake you up," Mary says in Aiden's defense. She smiles slightly at me with knowing eyes. "I know what it's like to be pregnant and you're tired all the time. Plus, the two of us need to get as much sleep as we can while we can. Once these babies get here, we're going to be on the move all the time." I laugh in agreement and glance over at Brandon. He's got one hand on Mary's belly and the other wrapped firmly around her waist. Mary's eyes move up to her mate's as she leans further into his hold before whispering, "I love you," with a smile. I smile at their softness towards each other, but I can't help but avert my eyes down to my hands against the counter.
My wolf whimpers as she tries to reach out to Mason's wolf again, but same as me, she's getting nothing in return. My worry for him is still there, but the doctor is right… if something were really wrong with him, I would know about it. The pain that I felt earlier is completely gone - which I'm grateful for - and the exhaustion is gone. The pain had to be from him getting hit or something during the battle. If the pain is gone now, and I can still feel him through the bond, then it can't be that serious.
"I was just going to make something small to eat," Mary's voice pulls me back out of my head. "These two said they weren't hungry, but I could make you something too if you'd like." I glance over at the two boys in surprise. These two will eat me out of this damn kitchen on any given day.
"You two aren't hungry? Since when are you two ever not hungry?" I ask with my hands on my hips playfully. Their laughter fills the room and for the first time since Mason left, I don't feel quite so empty. I shake my head and look back at Mary's smiling face. "I am hungry actually. I can help you out. I have a craving for chicken," I mumble as I move around the kitchen towards the fridge.
I look around the fridge and find a new package of chicken breasts. I grab the package and toss them to Brandon as I grab the eggs. "I'm going to fry these up, can you make some mashed potatoes or something like that?" She nods her head and busies herself by ordering Aiden to grab the potatoes out of the pantry. He grumbles something under his breath but does what she says anyway. I hear the water turn on as Mary starts washing the potatoes as I prepare the flour and eggs to batter the kitchen.
"We're going to go play some games in the game room down the hall, do you two need anything in here?" Brandon asks as he walks over to Mary. I glance over my shoulder to see her shake her head as she leans up to kiss the underside of his jaw softly. He looks at her unsure for a second before Aiden pulls him out of the kitchen without another word. Mary watches his retreating form until he's out of sight and takes a deep breath. I watch her closely to see her resting her hands against the edge of the sink as water runs over the potatoes.
"He's not going to let me do anything now," she whispers as she looks over at me. "I love that man to death and I am beyond grateful for Alpha Mason getting me back home, but he's got to give me some space to breathe," she sighs with a shake of her head. I know she's keeping the water on to drown out our voices if we speak softly enough. She moves closer to me as I batter the chicken and set it in the hot pan. "Can I tell you something?" she asks, worry filling her face. My stomach knots for a second as I look at her. She said she was fine earlier, that those fuckers didn't do anything to her, but maybe she just didn't want to admit it out loud to anyone yet.
"You can tell me anything, Mary. If there is ever anything you need to talk about you can always come to me."
She nods and I watch her eyes dart towards the doorway the boys walked out of earlier before speaking again, "I'm still scared. I know that Alpha Mason is taking care of everything, but I just can't shake the feeling that I'm going to wake back up in the room and this would have all been a dream. I feel like I'm going to wake up back in that cell. I just…" she shakes her head slightly as a pained expression crosses her face. It looks like she's reliving something. "I just can't be away from Brandon again."
I move to wrap my arms around her, noticing how she tenses up at the contact at first. I loosen my hold but don't let go. She's safe here, and she needs to know that no one is going to hurt her. She relaxes slightly in my arms and holds onto me.
"You're safe and you're home now. You don't have to worry about that place ever again because you are right where you belong," I speak softly in her ear as I gently rub my hand up and down her back comfortingly. She nods against my shoulder as I feel her tears hit my shoulder. "Mary, you don't have to answer this, but did they really just hit you? They didn't… hurt you… in any other way?"
I listen to her quick intake of breath as she pulls away and stares down at her hands. "No, at first they were tying me up and torturing me. They were trying to get information about the pack and Dylan and you. When that didn't work, they tried to… violate me to get answers." Her lip wobbles as the memories flood her mind. Pain for her fills my chest as I simply rest a hand against her arm in comfort. "They didn't, thankfully, but when they never succeeded they just beat on me some more. When they found out I was pregnant, it all stopped. Well, except for a couple of days ago when that guy hit me, but Dylan punished him for it. I don't know why but I can only imagine that Dylan thought that if me and the baby remained unharmed, it would be easier to threaten that he would hurt me in order to get you back. I don't think he would have hurt me though. He's an evil man, I have no doubt about that at all. I saw that in his eyes but there was a way that he looked at my stomach… almost like he was longing for a child of his own."
I think back to when my mother and Robert told me about Dylan's mate dying when they were young. I don't know much about what happened except she died before they could have any pups. My mom always said that was when she could see the change in Dylan. He acted cold towards everyone and became the monster he is today. I guess his longing to have a family and his mate back made him sympathetic towards Mary's situation, thank God.
"He never had a chance to have his own children with his mate. My mom told me she died when they were young. I don't even remember why I was asking, but I remember her saying that's when he started to become who he is now," I tell her as she turns to the potatoes in the sink. I move to the chicken and flip it over so it'll finish cooking. "I'm really sorry you had to go through all of that, Mary," I speak up after several seconds of silence. "It's all my fault. You've been through enough in your life, you shouldn't have had to worry about being kidnapped, while you're pregnant too. I'm just really sorry." She waves off my apology as she peels potatoes.
We settle into a comfortable silence for a good ten minutes, the two of us just working when she finally speaks up, "I forgot to tell you, we found out we're having a little boy today. The doctor said I should be able to deliver him in a couple of weeks, maybe sooner." I smile at her happily, glad to be on a much lighter topic. The fact that she can still smile and look toward the future after what she's been through is a miracle. This is what we need. Good news so we don't dwell on everything else that's happening around us. "I was going to ask you if it's okay that we turn one of the guest rooms into a nursery for him? That is if you're okay with us still staying here with the baby. I know with you being pregnant it could be too much," she rambles as she focuses on the potatoes. I can't even imagine being here alone right now. Even after Mason comes back home, not having Brandon and Mary here would feel… wrong.
"I know Brandon will do everything he can to keep us safe, but I just want to be surrounded right now, you know? Plus, I think it'll be good for him to see me interacting with other people instead of locking myself away like I tend to do when things happen. And I know the Alpha wants Brandon close to you to keep you guarded when he's not around."
"Mary," I interrupt with a chuckle. "I want you both to stay here. Of course, you can turn one of the guest bedrooms into a nursery. You can stay as long as you need to. I like having the two of you here, soon to be the three of you." She smiles at me and nods her head as we settle back into cooking. "Have you picked a name yet? Before Mason and the guys left, we decided on Everleigh."
"That's beautiful. Did you pick it?"
"Mason, actually," I laugh softly. "He said it and it just sounded perfect. I fell in love with it as soon as it came out of his mouth. I can't imagine calling my daughter anything else." I smile as I rub my hand over my belly. "Now, what did you pick?"
"We decided to name him James," she whispers as she stops and turns to me. "James Mason."
Mason?
Did they really decide to name their first-born son after my mate?
Tears well up in my eyes and I turn away. Mason will love to hear this.
"That's really sweet of you two. Mason will love to hear that when he gets home." I nod my head and close my eyes. I need my mate home now. I need his strong arms around me. The gaping hole in my chest feels like it's growing with each breath.
"Alaina, why are you crying?" Mary's voice breaks through my thoughts as she gently rests her hand against my arm. I look over at her and sigh as I wipe away my tears. "I know you miss him, but he's going to come home. It'll be okay," she whispers as she runs a hand up my back.
"I'm so scared that I'm never going to see him again. I have this… this whole in my chest and I've felt it since I had that sudden pain earlier. I felt so weak, and the pain was like every cell in my body was being pulled apart." Tears slide down my cheeks as I let my head hang as I lean against the counter. I know this has to do with my hormones running rampant on top of my fears which is making me even more emotional. "I just don't know what to do with myself, you know? What if something happens and he doesn't come home? I can't live without him, and then I think of Everliegh growing up without her father and it just kills me."
I can't stop the sob as I lean further into the counter for support. I feel Mary's arms wrap around me as her belly presses into my side, but I can't bring myself to even lean into her comforting touch. My wolf whimpers as I reach deep inside for her. She's been almost nonexistent since I woke up earlier. Worry fills me even more with her behavior.
Brandon and Aiden come rushing into the kitchen with panicked looks on their faces. Mary and I both look over at the door but I can't stop the tears from rolling down my face. Brandon rushes over to Mary and I finally realize she's crying too. Guilt fills my gut as I realize I made her cry. She just got back and I'm making her cry. Aiden walks over to me and gently wraps an arm around my shoulders as he leads me out of the kitchen. As we pass by the stove, he switches the stove off and moves the chicken off the hot burner. My appetite is gone, but maybe Mary can finish up the food if she's still hungry.
I sit back down on the couch as he moves to the floor at my feet. We sit in silence just staring off into space. I glance over at him and notice his eyes are distant.
"Aiden?"
"Yeah?" he asks, giving me his full attention. I take a deep breath as I consider not having this conversation with him. I watched him shut down earlier, and I don't want him to feel uncomfortable.
"When your brother died," I start slowly as he tenses up, "how did you deal with it?" He keeps his eyes on me but I can see as the emotion slips over her features. His hazel eyes fill with confusion and sadness as he thinks about my question, no doubt unsure where I'm going with this. "I know I'm supposed to keep positive and all that shit and just keep reminding myself that Mason's coming home. But Aiden, I have to prepare myself in case he doesn't."
"Alaina, this isn't a healthy conversation for us to be having. I know you're worried, I get it believe me, but the Alpha is completely capable of handling himself. He's strong and he has some of our best fighters there with him. He's going to make it home to you and that little girl. You just need to focus on that. Your worrying yourself is going to cause so much stress and that's good for no one."
I look down in shame. All this time I've been worrying about my mate, not thinking of the side effects it could have on Everleigh. Aiden's right. Mason is coming home. Everything is going to be fine. I repeat the words over and over again in my head as I will myself to believe them. The hole in my chest seems to expand slightly but I push it back. Everything is going to be fine.
"The food is ready," Brandon says as he stands just inside the doorway. I jerk my head around to look at him. I hadn't even heard him walk into the room. I hadn't even realized how long Aiden and I had been sitting in silence either. Aiden gets up and heads back into the kitchen without even a glance back at me. I sit there as more guilt fills me. I shouldn't have brought up his brother's death again. I had no right. I feel Brandon's warm hand wrap around my shoulder and squeeze gently. "Come eat, Alaina. You may not be hungry, but I'm sure that little girl is."
I nod my head as he moves around the couch to help me up. I smile my thanks and watch his back as he turns to head towards the kitchen. I stand there for a few seconds longer and take a few deep breaths. As I'm about to walk into the kitchen, I hear the soft voices filter from the three of them.
"Just keep telling her that. We need her to be as calm as possible right now. Mason's surely on his way back now with the rest of our pack. It'll all be fine," Brandon whispers. I stop walking and try my best to fight back my pain.
Because the problem with all of this is I can't tell who he's trying to convince more.
Aiden and me.
Or himself.