My dreams are crueler than ever, showing me Ethan holding a baby in his arms smiling at me. Crying in my dream, I reach out for them, crying out as loud as I can, " I love you, Ethan! Please, don't go!"
I can't stop my sobbing as my dream continues to plague me and change, only this time, I can feel his arms around me. I can smell him as he clutches me to his chest, soothing me with with kisses on the head.
"It was only a dream, Sam. I'm still here. I'm not going anywhere." He whispers.
I take a deep breath and can smell him.
God, I can smell him and hear his heartbeat.
This is too cruel, why would I hear and smell him so clearly!
I mumble, trying to say what is in my heart, "I'm sorry, I love you. I love you so much."
I feel kisses on my forehead and his hand under my chin lifting my face up.
I blink my eyes open, realizing he's still here with me.
"Ethan? You're here, really here?" I stare at him with wide eyes, before bursting into more tears.
I hate how weepy I am being. I can't help it though, he stayed.
He stayed.
"Of course I'm still here, Sam. I can be upset about the situation, but I still love you. There's no way I was going to just leave you like that. You stayed for me when we first met. It was my turn to stay for you." He caresses my face, kisses my forehead, and holds me tighter.
He's holding me like I would disappear if he loosened his grip on me. And I'm okay with that, because I'm holding him just as tightly, taking in how complete I feel in his arms. How I fit perfectly next to his side. How his scent intoxicates and soothes me at the same time.
I slowly detach my self from his arms and excuse my self to the bathroom. I wash my face and brush my teeth, before going back to my bedroom.
I find Ethan laying back, his shoes, pants and button up on the floor by the foot of the bed. I look at the clock and see that it's only midnight.
Ethan pulls back the covers and motions for me to join him. I do after a shy, awkward smile crosses my face. I curl up next to him, soaking in his presence that no dream could ever replicate.
"I thought that you had left." I mumble against his chest, my hand moving across the soft cotton of his shirt, feeling his solid body underneath it.
"Did you really want me to leave you?" Ethan strokes my hair with the one arm wrapped around me, his free hand coming up to intertwine with the fingers of the one on his body.
"No, I just ... feel really stupid. You did not do anything wrong and I just left without hearing you out. You deserve better than me." I rub my thumb against his, admiring his hand from my spot on his chest.
He takes a deep breath and sighs, making my head bob with his chest. "Yes, I didn't deserve you just walking out and leaving me, but I forgive you."
My breath catches in my chest at that and I freeze.
"I can't hold it against you for doing the only thing you knew how to self preserve. However, I can ask you to talk to me first before you make any serious life changing decisions again, to at least consider what I have to say, first." He rolls his body to the side, facing me and looks into my eyes.
"Samantha, do you still want to be with me?" His eyes have me pinned down, waiting for an answer.
I nod my head yes, unable to find my voice.
"Do you think that you will be up to trying to communicate issues with me, instead of running away from them? Or from me?" He caresses my face, propping himself up to lean over me as I nod, yes, again.
His lips come down, softly brushing mine, as if they were made out of delicate blossoms that he would crush if he didn't hold back. My heart ached just over this simple chaste kiss that he was giving me.
I pressed myself harder against him, wrapping my hands around his head, holding him closer as I deepened our kiss, sending my heart into a drumming frenzy in my rib cage.
I need him. I can't believe how fucking stupid I was to have almost let this go, forever.
Searching for breaths in between our kissing, Ethan's hand glides over my shoulder and sends a shiver over my skin when he caresses the outer mound of my breast.
One of my hands moves down to the hem of his shirt, playing with it in between my thumb and finger, teasing his skin under it.
His breathing quickens as his kiss becomes more possessive, demanding more of my mouth with his tongue. He demanded more with his hand that slid up my shirt, cupping my breast, teasing my nipple with his thumb.
Moaning against his lips, I arch my back, pressing myself into his grasp. He moans in response, pressing his body down in me, letting me feel how aroused he is. That amazing cock of his could put a hole in my leg right now, it's like steel.
A smile breaks through onto my lips, knowing he still wants me just as much as I want him.
I tug his shirt up over his well toned stomach and chest, breaking our kiss to rip it off over his head. He dives back down, but instead of my lips, he's lifting my shirt, going straight for my nipples.
The shock of his hot mouth, then the sharp bite of his teeth as they grazed my sensitive flesh makes me gasp out, "Ethan!"
He raises his head, tugging my shirt the rest of the way off, kissing my lips before dragging his tongue back over my other breast. His hands travel down to my hips as he sat up, tugging at my shorts and underwear as I raised my ass up, to help out.
Ethan sends them flying over his shoulder with a devilish smirk, before taking in my naked body, licking his lips in anticipation.
I know that he's seen me naked, more times than I can count, but the way he drinks my appearance in, still makes me blush and involuntarily, I try to close my legs. He sends shivers all over me as his fingers trail over, making their way down and up my thighs.
"You are so fucking beautiful, Samantha." His husky, confidant words make me tremble and my core tighten. He leans over me, taking his time to press his still clothed, steel pipe for a cock, against me.
I groan, tugging at his boxer briefs, "Why are these still on?"
Inhaling a sharp breath through his teeth, his nose grazes the skin on my neck, his hot breath sending another wave of tremoring pleasure to every inch of me. The nip of his teeth on my skin force a gasp from my throat, his lips whispering against my skin.
"I'm afraid if I take them off right now, I just might take you rougher than I should. I do not wish to ravage you so roughly."
I whimper at the thought, excited and intimidated, "Ravage me, please..." I beg, spreading my legs, reaching for his boxer briefs to pull them down.
He lets me pull his cock free, stroking it in my hand, loving how he moaned and hissed from my touch on his velvety member.
"Yeah, you want me to fuck you like an animal?" He grunts.
"Yes, Hard." I respond, quickening my pace of my hand on him.
"Fast. Rough." I emphasize each word, enjoying how his jaw dropped open like he could not believe I was getting him so close.
He pulls back from my grasp and takes a couple deep breaths as he removes the last bit of clothing on, shoving them off the bed with a foot.
Ethan finds my hands as he spread my legs with a knee. His fingers interlock with mine, holding them firmly, pulling them up from my sides to high above my head.
His lips find mine in a fierce kiss, my heart beating like crazy when I go to move my hands and he refuses to release them from his firm grasp.