Plunged into darkness, Azzario had leaned his head against the back of his armchair and observed the estate's park plunged into night. Only the crackling of the fireplace animated his private office. If he had confined himself to the depths of his private apartments, it was in an attempt to tear himself away from his guilt.
"Azzario?"
His mother's voice spoke in the quiet and darkness and he had to arm himself with his last forms of delicacy so as not to yell at her.
"What's going on mother?"
She turned on the light and he felt her hesitant footsteps approach the chair.
Why are you here ? It's one o'clock in the morning?
Azzario took a sip of his whiskey and rested his head on the back, staring out.
"I can't sleep and I needed to think...
"Azzario darling, talk to me... is it because of this morning?" This illusion I had about a possible marriage?
He turned his head towards her, glaring at her.
I already told you ! There will be no wedding! He snarled as he sat up from the chair, expressing his annoyance in a tone shaking with anger.
"You can't say that Azzario!" You know you won't have much choice soon, Rosella snapped, getting up to start pacing.
You have no right to interact in my life from now on. He hissed between his teeth. I wasted years of my life listening to you and look at me...
"Azzario, do you think I don't feel guilty enough?"
Not enough apparently, he whispered, getting up to face him, you did not feel what I felt!
He slowly advanced towards her, his mouth twisting with disgust and hatred.
"You let me marry Lucianna, you made me believe in love, and I was twenty four, and I believed in it miserably. Do you have any idea what it's like to hear a woman tell you she's expecting a baby and you're getting married, only to have three more weeks in the middle of a family dinner that last t announces that she was finally wrong! That there is no baby!
At that memory, Rosella blanched.
I realized too late, it was only to trap me, he continued darkly. Azzario twirled his glass for a moment, peering into it, and laughed mirthlessly, filled with bitterness.
"Do you want to talk about the future Madame Dantes now?"
"Azzario please...
No, no, it's important to talk about it, because this time I had the intelligence not to listen to you, because when she told me about her pregnancy I almost believed it. , I thank heaven for not being interested in this pregnancy, for not having touched, or even feeling the slightest emotion
He paused and stepped closer to her.
When this child came into the world, such was the surprise to discover that he was not my son! He declared with scathing irony. A typical American little blond, it's almost to make you laugh. He added sarcastically.
"I know how much you suffered from all this Azzario, but the years have passed now.
Azzario stepped aside to stand in the dark.
A curse weighs on me, I will never have children...
Azzario had taken a resigned tone, because he no longer had the slightest desire to believe in a marvelous future.
"There's no Azzario curse, just women who've been sneaky and only aspired to be opulent, you know all women dream of being on your arm.
A bitter laugh escaped him.
It's over, I gave enough, I don't want to hope anymore, I should have listened to father, and focused only on family business, that was my role.
His mother stepped forward, her eyes flashing with anger.
Azzario, you've just passed your thirties, you know that one day you'll need children! A home !
He looked down at his half empty glass, mouth twisted.
Sharon seems to care about you, right? She is fine and...
"Stop it," he threatened in a deep voice, raising his eyes to hers.
She pulled back, aware that she was going too far.
Give him a chance Azzario, you know deep down that I'm right.
Azzario tensed his mouth, without a word, she walked away almost ashamed of having had this conversation with him,
"One last thing," he said, swallowing the rest of his glass and then slamming it down on his desk. The next time you meet a pregnant woman, be careful not to despise her as you did with this young girl, she has nothing to do with our family stories, is that quite clear?
Rosella put her hand over her heart.
I did not mean to be contemptuous, forgive me if that was the case.
Well yes, it was, the poor did not know where to go, and I have a certain share of responsibility too, I'm very angry with myself for having cursed this innocent, he growled against himself while immersing himself in the contemplation of the park plunged into darkness.
They were silent for a moment, before Rosella spoke again.
"Could you invite her to the Yule Ball?" She offered hesitantly, so as not to stir up his anger. Azzario didn't answer, she left her office and left him alone. His mother's idea was not without making him think. He had behaved like a real brute with this young woman. Should he curse this woman because she reminded him of what he hadn't had? And what he would probably never have? By simple bitterness?
Azzario rubbed his guilt ridden face.
Don't let me go now! You understood me ? cried Emma hoarsely to her Christmas tree.
She pointed at him sternly.
Hold on! More than two days ! You have no right to let me down now.
Emma lifted her chin, staring defiantly at him, but her poor Christmas tree was letting her know from its drooping branches that he was about to die.
She sighed sadly before she heard a knock on her door.
Emma sized up the latter with a beating heart.
Her end of the month had been difficult, and she was slightly behind on her rent. She approached the door and wiggled her fingers nervously.
"I'm sorry about the delay on my rent," she said, unlocking her door. I was planning to pay you tomorrow I just...
Emma felt her legs give way when she saw Azzario Dantes on her doorstep, standing to his full height, dressed in a black suit, making him as dark as darkness.