Yesenia
"Father is dead."
"Mhm."
"Mother is dead."
"Mhm."
"Everyone is dead."
...
"Mhm."
I slowly look away from Hanafin and bury my face into my knees. The rain, battered the canvas surrounding the carriage, drowning out almost all sound. The road was bumpy, very bumpy, and it kinda hurt.
"THREE COMING UP FROM OUR BACK! WE CAN'T LET THEM GET THE LAST OF MALLEFARD'S LEGACY! STALL THEM FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN!" Rudeus screams from up front.
Through the rain I could hear the distinct pings of metal clashing on metal, soon fading away into the distance, leaving both allies and enemies behind. We weren't going to come back for them either. I knew cause it's happened seven times already.
"Damn it! I'm going to get you home, I'm going to get you home, I'm going to get you home!" Rudeus feverishly says to himself. "Move faster you damn animals!" Rudeus yells at the horses.
I shrivel back into my little world. Why... Why, why is this happening to me. My whole body shudders from the shock, the first tears finally form in my eyes, until finally, great sobs rack my body, all the meanwhile Hanafin stares at me soullessly from the corner of his eye.
The wagon jolts again as it flies over another rock. A tree branch tears through the canvas, unleashing a cascade of water into the carriage.
I open my eyes. The sun was shining through the sky. Although at the same time, rainclouds dotted the sky to the west, creating a strange landscape that was simultaneously sunny and wet. I reach out and clutch a medallion close to my chest, a remnant of the past, then let go and stuff it into my breast pocket.
I curve the sides of my mouth to try to form a faint smile before returning back stone-faced.
Move. Get out of bed. The day has already started. I need to return to my studies…
…
Move. Get out of bed. The day has already started. I need to return to my studies…
I repeat this mantra to myself over and over again until my feet finally begin to stir.
I fit myself into a loose dress and walk down to the dining room where Hanafin and Grandy were together eating breakfast.
"You're quite late today." Grandy says as he watches me enter the room. He was a sort of foster parent to us, trying his best to fill the void that opened up from two years ago.
"My apologies, I overslept. It will not happen again." I say curtly in response.
"Remember, discipline, you'll need lots of it in the future, that includes getting out of bed in time."
I nod my head once again and sit down, stabbing my fork into the side of a sausage, cutting into it, one slice at a time. It was a simple sausage, egg, and biscuit breakfast, with a little bit of jam to go along with the biscuit.
Hanafin looks at me from the corner of his eye as I do this before settling down and finishing the rest of his breakfast.
I was usually up at 7:00 for breakfast, this lasted around 30 minutes until Hanafin and I separate to train our Anku. In Hanafin's case, he was training his to combat skills while I was trying to improve my control of Sananku. Not that we were particularly talented, it was simply our duty to master these skills.
I focus on the rat in front of me, holding my palms out, focusing my Anku into the rat's body, it was sedated of course, I was deemed too delicate to be around an injured animal, even as small as a rat.
"Remember, burns are all in the skin, keep the moisture at healthy levels, shed off the dead skin carefully, no need to worry about filtering the blood or checking the bone. Focus now, it'll only get harder once we get to real people." My instructor says.
I nod my head once and continue working on the rat, eventually fading away the burn to a patch of hairless skin. Which was possible to grow back; however, I wasn't nearly at that level yet.
After training, 9:30 comes, now was the time we reconvene for intense study, trade and economics, social structure and hierarchy, foreign relations, public relations, everything that a leader of a country would need to know.
"A foreign emissary offers to lend twenty hundred thousand kilograms of fabrics and textiles over the next ten years in exchange for allowing untaxed passageway through the Fane river for 6 months. What do you do?" Our tutor asked.
"I would reject it, and then haggle for more goods or more information on what the intent behind the offer is, the first offer is always a trap." Hanafin says.
"Respectable answer, how about you Yesenia?"
I hesitate for a couple of seconds, "… yea same answer."
"Try to say something different, even if you truly believe that's the ideal solution, considering other options is still important."
"Well, there could be so many other factors that go into play, untaxed passageway for only 6 months over an absurd amount of goods? It would cost them even more money in the long term. Considering these factors, I don't think they would be trying to trick us. They must be desperate for something."
"All that could be true, but I've told you this over and over again, why does that matter?"
"I know, it doesn't matter. I know I need to put the needs of Lyster first always. It's simply a second perspective as you asked me to."
The instructor then looks at me for a couple of seconds. "Very good, you answered that perfectly."
It was now 12:00pm, lessons end and we take thirty minutes to eat lunch.
"How are you feeling today?" Hanafin asks.
"As I always have." I respond plainly.
"As I always have… That's a horrible answer you know. How am I supposed to know how you've been feeling?"
"I guess I'm… just existing then. I really don't know how I'm feeling either."
"I know how I'm feeling though." Hanafin grins, his demeanor very different from usual. "I'm feeling very happy right now, see?" He points to his mouth. "Smilin."
I weakly grin at his springy attitude. "Well, guess I'm feeling a little bit better now thanks to you."
"That's great, I hope you learn how to smile again too."
12:30pm or the most tedious part of the day. The two of us sit alone, on a balcony, Hanafin and I simply watch old men and women argue for hours on end. The leaders in this time of war, a council that we would join shortly once we turned old enough.
The two of us furiously scribble into our notebooks as we try to keep up with the conversation, later submitting the notes to our tutor for review.
"You ever stop and think what they're accomplishing by arguing every day?" Hanafin asks.
I crack a jaded smile at him. Of course, it was something I thought about every single day but never brought up in conversation. "No, what do you mean by that?" I keep a calm demeanor.
"I mean, we're in a war right? Democracy is fine and all but these decisions are coming out way too slowly, we need a singular leader."
Which we did have back before that fateful day. Until my father that king had been assassinated, which would have been fine as power would have been transferred one rung down the ladder, to the oldest son, but he was dead too, and the next rung, and the next rung, and the next rung… Until all was left was a hastily cobbled together collection of nobles from around the country, too deep within the hierarchy system for anyone to really know what's going on.
I close my eyes and try to stop myself from falling into a dark spiral of thoughts.
"Yesenia? Are you still there? Are you still awake?" Hanafin looks at me worriedly.
"Yes… Sorry about that. I just… I don't know." I recoil back as Hanafin unexpectedly taps my cheeks and pushes the sides of my mouth up.
"Hey, hey, just smile." He says as he shapes my mouth into a grin. "Trust me, you'll get out of that hole someday, and I can help! We've both gone through the same thing, so all I need you to do right now is smile." He then cautiously lets go of my face.
I keep the position on my mouth, smiling, although it was mostly just to appease him. What he was saying was much easier said than done. Although I still did appreciate his growth in the last couple of weeks.
"It's alright, I don't want you to worry, just give me a couple more weeks and I'll be there."
Hanafin looks at me for a couple of seconds. "Alright! I trust you." The both of us then jolt back to attention as one of the nobles slams the table in rage. The argument heat up, quickly making it into a much more interesting show.
6:30pm, the most important part of the day. Hanafin and I shift through stacks of papers. They were minor but… I stamp my approval on one of the stacks of paper. What we did here would have real impacts on people's lives. The decision to give out a loan to shingle the roof of one of the government owned buildings or decide if it was a waste of money. The decision to set up a new park or library or something else on an unoccupied space.
Basically, it was just busywork, we were given no power over the war or more important decisions. It was to simply prepare us to join the council once we were sixteen.
I lean back on my chair in thought as the next paper comes in. A party, held in the north side of the city, somewhat like a festival where anybody could come and go, held two months from now if approved. A complete waste of money in every single way. I stare blissfully outside a window, the sun dropping below the horizon. A party huh… All your friends and family, your loved ones… Who do I have left other than Hanafin?
We're limited contact to the nobles cause we were young. We would be very easily influenced and taken advantage of. Grandy was the only one let near us because he was the oldest and most trusted.
I just… Don't have any friends… Or even anyone I could talk to. I couldn't go outside either, my existence in this city was supposed to be kept a secret. I look over to the door.
…
Then I stamp my approval for funding the party…
"But it can only be held later than 8:00pm, as to not disturb the workflow of the city." I write down in a small corner of the document.
An aged man opens the door. "If you are finished, allow me to take the papers." He says.
"I got through my stack, how about you sister?" Hanafin leans back in his chair and asks.
"Mmh, I'm done too." I say, deep in thought.
"Well, then if you may Crux."
Three weeks later.
I wake up.
Breakfast.
Sananku training.
Tutoring.
Lunch.
Council observing.
Dinner.
Then…
"An unusually low amount of requests today. Should be able to get through this in two or so hours." Hanafin murmurs as he shuffles through the stack of papers.
I don't pay him any attention, I simply flip through the documents, stamping arbitrarily without giving it more than a couple seconds of thought. I was very lucky that we got so little work today.
"You got a place to be?" My brother glances at my work.
I smile mischievously. "Can you keep a secret?"
Hanafin frowns. "You know I have to stop you right? You know the consequences… And I agree with them."
"You say all of that, but you'll let me go anyways wouldn't you?" I ask.
"…Yea, I trust you enough, how are you going to sneak out of here though?"
I look back down at my paper, signing off on a document detailing a mysterious package that was to be delivered to an abandoned apartment somewhere in the 5th district.
"By abusing a little bit of my influence."
After rushing through my work, I give my papers to Crux and am escorted back to my room by the maids, as we approach the room I single out one of the maids to come in with me. She was quite short, even for a girl, making her around my height, me being a growing thirteen year old.
"Let's make this quick." I say as I begin taking off my dress.
"Did you send the money?" The maid asks.
"Just signed off on it, your family should receive it shortly." I grin as we begin exchanging our clothes.
"And…" The maid hesitates. "Can you tell me if you're the real Yesenia or the decoy? I know it's supposed to be a secret but… I'm worried that I might be making a huge mistake."
"Don't worry, I'm the fake one, if anything happens to me, they'll simply find a replacement. Also…" I point to a loose wooden plank inside the closet. "If you hear anyone knocking on the door, hide under there so you won't get into trouble, and if you do get into trouble, I promise I'll do everything in my power to bail you out." As we finish swapping our clothes, I begin applying makeup, marking tiny shades on my face, trying my best to imitate the wrinkles that come with age. Finally, stuffing some pads into my chest and hips. I look at myself in the mirror.
"Well should look convincing enough from a distance." I murmur to myself.
"Good luck to you. I'll be back in around five hours." I say to the maid before exiting the door.
The other maids quickly rush to crowd around me, covering my face from curious onlookers.
Without saying anything they begin moving away, taking me along with them.
Well, hope our secretary doesn't ask too many questions about those requests.
The issue with my plan was that all the maids lived and slept in the castle, trips to their families and loved ones were only allowed by request under careful supervision from the guards. This was because of their close proximity with the interior of the castle; they were a major concern for information leakage.
So, the maid before me made a request to attend the festival… and I bribed another guard. Not bad for a thirteen year old eh?
I confidently stride to the front gate, confident in my disguise and planning. The sun rapidly setting, throwing shadows all over the area.
"Hello, my name is Jine Rackle, I believe I made a request not too long ago for the festival up north today." I deepen my voice, trying my best to get rid of that kid squeak as I hold out a badge.
"You're a little shorty aren't you?" The guard chuckles, then stops as soon as he sees my displeased expression. "Uh, hold on let me check." The guard begins flipping through some papers. "Alright, I got you down here." He then turns around to yell. "We got another request for the festival! Who wants to go?"
"I'll-" The guard I bribed tries to immediately take the opportunity but is interrupted.
"Guess I'm in the mood for a break." An aged voice said before stepping out under the gate.
My shoulders falter the instant I see who the man was, staring right at me was one of the nobles, Crux.