Chereads / The Saint Likes Me, But I’m Screwed… [Rewrite] / Chapter 19 - Chapter Nineteen: Soft Like Feathers

Chapter 19 - Chapter Nineteen: Soft Like Feathers

 At the beach, where the rush of waves hit the shore. A girl sat quietly, hugging her knees, unbothered by all the damp sand. The sunrise twinkled in the waves as the horizon shimmered golden. Mirroring that was the girl's hair, dancing in the wind as they sparkled in the like-warm morning rays.

 But instead of catching the breathtaking view, the girl buried her face in her knees, hugging them. Her eyes felt dry, itchy yet damped, sticky, and uncomfortable.

 "This sucks… hic…" she voiced hoarsely under her breath. 

 It was still early morning, yet a girl was sobbing alone. Her heart was a mess; it was all uncomfortable, and each beat was like being stabbed with a knife. Her lungs were still heavy, but crying helped as she was finally able to feel herself breathing.

 "I probably look like a mess right now…" she murmured.

 The girl finally raised her gaze, seeing the beautiful view she missed while crying her heart out. Thoughts swirled in her mind as she watched the sun going up.

"He likes me… romantically—but also likes someone else? That's so unfair…!" she exclaimed under her breath. "Is it Luna?" she wondered.

 An image of Luna flashed in her mind. A petite girl with silver and black hair showed up. Not only was Luna a princess, but she was also one of the prettiest people Miu had seen—of course… it made sense he'd fall for her,… she convinced herself.

 "…"

 As she silently watched waves hitting the shores, tears ran down her cheeks again. A faint sob escaped as she wiped off the tears, but more kept coming.

 "This sucks…" she reiterated, resting her chin on her knees while puffing her cheeks. "It suuuucks~" she groaned.

 Not caring about her appearance anymore, she lay on the sand, watching clouds slowly move throughout the sky, she covered her face with her arm—cringing.

 "—Thanks for telling me…! Aaah~ Mouuu-iiiii! I'm such an idiot! What do you mean, "Thanks for telling me," all bravely only to run away crying?! Stupid stupid stupid! You should've asked him who the other person was or if they were an item! Aaah! Dummy! Why didn't you ask why he liked you?! Why not talk it out?! It's gonna be soo awkward now—I wanna diiiie! Please just kill meeee!"

 Miu lay there, unsure where all her emotions were since everything was swirling around chaotically. She was conflicted about many things. The main one was that he liked her romantically—yet rejected her.

 "Why…?"

 After all the self-reprimand, all that came out was a small whimper asking why. Why was she rejected? Why did he like someone else? Why couldn't it have been her? Why? Why? Why?

 "Am I not pretty enough? Was I overconfident since everyone told me how pretty I was? Is it my personality? Or am I not smart enough for him? Am I too clumsy? Why…? Am I just not his type? Ah… is it my white hair and red eyes…?"

 Her voice hitched as her body began to shake. Unpleasant pain arose again from her stomach, reaching her chest and throat—coursing through her whole body in a sharp pain with each heartbeat.

 "Even though… even though I've liked you for so long—why couldn't it have been me?"

 Miu lay there, not noticing any discomfort caused by the sand. Her flowy, soft white hair had become a total mess. With glistening eyes filled with tears, she clasped her hands, clenching her chest tightly. Her parted lips let out a small groan as words were too heavy to come out.

 ..

 Back in high school, in her second year, Miu and Noel went on a tour hosted by the prestigious university nearby. But Miu had somehow gotten lost and couldn't find them—but as she was getting anxious, three sleazy-looking boys approached her. They surrounded but said something about helping her out, but she couldn't recall their exact words since it didn't seem like they had good intentions—

 "What are you bunch doing?"

 That day was the first time she met him. Alum coldly looked at the sleazy guys—the one who'd grabbed her wrist let go as he walked toward him, surrounding him. Miu called out, telling them to stop—but her voice was too meek for them to hear or listen to.

 The guy's friends tried to stop him, but it was too late as he'd thrown out a punch—only for it to be caught. Alum wore an indifferent expression while the guy was screaming as Alum was about to twist his arm. The others couldn't just let Alum hurt their friend, so they were all about to attack until he uttered chilling words.

 "Go for it—I'll break your bones twice over."

 Even Miu, as a bystander, shuddered at his words—they all knew Alum was serious. He walked passed them and grabbed Miu's wrist, dragging her along as she was too stunned to react.

"—Hey, wait!" one of them called out, but Alum didn't stop nor look back.

 Miu quietly followed him until he eventually let go, taking a seat by the ocean. Beside the bench was a sign but also a map of the campus, showing the current location.

 "Th-thank you…" Miu voiced sheepishly, but Alum didn't turn her way once.

 "…"

 Miu found herself pouting, her eyebrows furrowing. She huffed and moved closer to him, sitting beside him. "Thank you," she echoed her sentiment.

 "…"

 Alum wouldn't yield, ignoring her as if she wasn't there. Getting annoyed, Miu leaned closer to him. She cupped her hands and brought them closer to his ear. "Thank you," she said sweetly.

 Instantly, Alum backed away, his eyes slightly widened, his lips a little parted as if he was going to say something but didn't.

 Miu covered her mouth, blushing with a devilishly sweet grin, "Njy~hi~hi," she giggled while covering her mouth. But instantly, the realization of her boldness struck, and she jolted to her feet.

 "I-I'll be going now," she stammered as she turned around, practically running while looking at the ground.

 Alum watched her leave, scratching his cheek. "What a strange girl…" he chuckled. Then, his face returned to indifference.

  ..

 Time passed. Miu found herself in front of the university as a student, excited about starting the student life she'd seen in movies and TV series. She was not alone; her childhood friend Noel was also going to attend, which was reassuring.

 At the time, Alum was at the far back of her mind, she did want to get to know him a little, maybe befriend him despite not being good with men. And yet…

 "Uh… Miu, you should totally stay away from that guy," her friends said.

 She couldn't understand why they'd badmouth him, telling her how he was bad news, dull, and that if she wanted a bad boy, there were more fun ones rather than dangerous ones like Alum.

 Miu's heart ached to hear the things about him. She knew how nice he was, but was it only from her perspective? She'd be a fool for blindly listening but equally so for not heeding their warnings. However…

 "I know you guys worry for me, but… I don't like hearing my friends badmouth others… Even if you don't think he's a good person. But it's also true he helped me once…"

 Her 'friends' were surprised. Even though they didn't know her well, they sort of understood what kind of person she was—drama followed as they thought she was too much of a goodie two shoes, telling them what to do or what not to do even though she just shared what made her uncomfortable.

 They thought they could exclude her and bully her a little, but little did they know she had experience and could handle it—besides, she was far too likable and deceptively strong despite her meek exterior. They also realized that she was popular not only because of her pretty face but also her personality and open-mindedness. It eventually stopped because picking on her was 'no fun.' And due to all the drama, she couldn't find the time to approach Alum.

 But one day, on the weekend, she came across a quiet person sitting on a bench, facing the ocean on her trips to the store close to her apartment. She thought he was probably looking at the birds playing in the waters.

 At first, she didn't think much of it, but she grew curious as she saw him more and more. Then, when she didn't have frozen groceries on her list, she thought she could approach this stranger as practice—maybe she could learn a thing or two.

 He ignored me whenever I tried talking to him. It was helpless with Noel's help, too… Is it perhaps it's my approach? Awaa… I'm not too good when it comes to talking to complete strangers, but… if I can talk to a complete stranger, then perhaps I'll manage to talk to Alum? Alright! I should try to start a conversation and have it going! She thought.

 But… when she finally approached the guy who'd been staring out the ocean for months, she realized—it was Alum. She hadn't realized it was him because of the hood, but now that she was sitting next to him, she couldn't muster up the courage she had when she decided to approach.

 "N-nice weather we have here…" she tried to start with something mundane.

 "…"

 Ignored… sigh… I don't get it… why doesn't he want to talk to me? Am I not appealing enough? I don't think I have a bad personality and I can talk about a lot about many topics too…

 With those thoughts in mind, she mindlessly began to feed the birds, digging her hand into a small bag of birdseed she picked up at the store.

 "…Where did you get the feed?"

 "…?"

 Suddenly, Alum spoke to her. He glanced at her, not with cold eyes, but rather the curious kinds. At that moment, Miu finally realized he didn't ignore her consciously; he was looking straight at her where when she tried talking to him, he looked passed her as if she wasn't there.

 Wait… that time he helped me. He didn't look at me either—at least until I whispered into his ear—wait! If he remembers, then he must think I'm the weird girl from back then! Ugh… I don't want that…!

 Internally, Miu was groaning and holding her head. She wanted to disappear just thinking about what she did.

 "Oh…um… at the store over there." She stammered a little but managed to tell him with a smile.

 "I see, thank you—"

 "Wait!"

 Alum was about to get up, presumably to buy a bag of birdseed, but Miu stopped him by pinching his sleeve, looking at him with determined eyes; she didn't want him to get away now. But it was also because the birds shouldn't be overfed.

 "We shouldn't overfeed the birds," she pulled him down. "Here," she added, handing him her bag while averting her eyes.

 "How much?" Alum asked, tilting his head as he opened the Swish app.

 "Really…?" Miu frowned. "It's fine. I'll be feeding them, too. I-I'm just letting you join me," she huffed.

 "Thanks."

 At that moment, even with cars in the background and buzzing people around them. It was like the two were isolated from the world. The bench was between two trees. It formed the perfect frame. The two of them, the bench, and the ocean with birds splashing the water as they were fed.

 "Oh! That one's such a glutton!" Miu giggled.

 "It's the biggest," Alum remarked. "Oh? That one stole from the smallest one," he added.

 "Poor thing…" Miu said, throwing some more seeds its way.

 "…"

 At that moment, Alum glanced at her. Miu was just a girl he passed by at the university and the strange girl from back then. Even at this moment, he found her strange—was it perhaps due to her being Noel's childhood friend?

 When it was time to say goodbye, Miu stood there, her face completely flushed red.

 "See you around, Miu…"

 His words echoed inside her head—so he does know who I am! She exclaimed inwardly, covering her face while crouching down.

 Afterward, when heading back home, she met Noel on the way. He was going to hang out with Alum at a pet café—the direction Alum headed toward when they split up. Only then did she realize why he was there—he was killing time waiting for Noel—he also wasn't home whenever she saw the stranger sitting by the ocean.

  ..

 In the days after the encounter with Alum, Miu finally managed to talk to him more often. It was initially awkward when she joined him and Noel—it was either Noel and Alum talking or Miu and Noel—the worst case was Noel teasing them.

 But she eventually grew pretty comfortable around him. It was also evident that Alum had grown more accustomed to her as well. Slowly, their other friends would join, even if Alum didn't talk to them much; they sort of learned he was just not very talkative and was mostly in his own world, even if it came across as unfriendly.

 "—Huh? Alum, you're still up?" Miu asked.

 Alum briefly glanced at her and noticed that she wore cute white feather-printed pajamas. He couldn't help but chuckle since everyone was in t-shirts and shorts.

 "Hey… did you just scoff at my outfit!? Huh?! Did you?!" she huffed, raising her shoulders while crossing her arms.

 "A little. You're the only one in pajamas on this camping trip."

 "Urk… not you too! Noel told me the same… No wonder Julia, Lova, and Lena cracked up when they saw me… but hey, you didn't answer my question," Miu pouted.

 "Is that so? I thought it was obvious," Alum leaned slightly to the side with a question mark above his head.

 "Well… yeah, but it's something we say…" she grumbled as she approached.

 "I was messing with you."

 "…"

 "So, the answer is: I'm watching the fire. That's all."

 "…Can I join?" Miu asked, hesitating a little.

 "Can you?"

 Mou… this guy… she thought.

 A faint smile tugged her lips, and she sat beside him on the log. "Mmmh you can barely see the stars even out here…" she said, looking at the clear night sky.

 "Mm, the night sky is bright this time around," Alum replied.

 "Hey~ you're looking at me, not the stars!" she giggled. "Seriously… Is my fit really that amusing?" she pouted.

 "Somewhat," he bluntly replied, gazing up at the sky.

 "Hmph!" Miu crossed her arms.

 The flames continued to crackle throughout the night, making it not too cold for her, who'd fallen asleep on his shoulder. Alum couldn't help but sigh.

 "She's going to fuss when she wakes up…" he murmured, covering her with his jacket. And it was as he thought. When Miu woke up, she fussed.

 "—Sorry, your shoulder must be stiff… ah, I'll give you a shoulder massage. Oh, You lend me your jacket too… are you cold?"

 "It's fine…" he sighed inwardly.

  .. 

 "—Hey, does this look good?" she asked, showing off a white dress she was trying on when they all went shopping.

 "Mm, it suits you," Alum would reply.

 "Yup!" Kevin gave her a thumbs up.

 "Kevin… I don't think she was asking you," Kurt said.

 "Exactly…" Lena sighed.

 And the previous summer…

 "Alum c'mon! The water is nice, and everyone's—"

 "They're acting like kids," he shrugged.

 But despite those words, he let Miu drag him into the water. Noel joined in, starting a war as everyone splashed water on everyone.

 But… then, one day…

 "Oh, yeah, Miu. How is it going with Alum?" Julia asked.

 "Hmm? What do you mean?" Miu replied, slightly confused.

 "Huh?" her other friends also seemed confused, but not by Julia's inquiry, but by Miu's apparent obliviousness.

 "No, like… aren't you two a thing?" 

 "…" Miu's lips parted, her eyes shaky, and her face reddened. "I-it's not like that! We're just friends! Geez!" she protested. 

 Since that day, Miu couldn't be calm around Alum anymore—she found herself more jittery than usual, but she tried to play it cool. She recalled her face being a little hot around him, and perhaps her heart hammered a little—but when Julia mentioned them being an item, she figured it out—she'd fallen for him.

  ….

 ..

 As Miu lay on the damp sand, she couldn't help but giggle a little. Despite some of her awkward moments, she couldn't help but reach a hand toward the sky. Her heart was pounding just thinking about it.

—CRACK…

 As Miu was about to get up, she noticed a small crack in the air—the gap became larger until it fractured, just like shattering glass. Her heart jumped as she backed away, but she couldn't take her eyes off it.

 But more shockingly, a young man exited the fractured space, levitating slightly above the sand. The shards clung to him until he fully exited—only then did they snap back into place as if nothing occurred.

 Upon closer inspection, the man had soft white hair. It danced in the breeze. He noticed her stare and turned—his eyes shook as if he was genuinely surprised to see someone there.

 His gem-like blue eyes, which burned bright, softened slowly. The air around him was steaming; his black cloak was scorched with missing parts, and his dark silver armguard was brittle, crumbling apart. As pieces of his shoulder guard fell off and landed on the sand, it sizzled as the surrounding sand became molten.

 "…!?"

 Miu's mind went completely blank. Her heart quickened, thumping heavily as her breath hitched and her breathing ran out of control. He noticed her sorry state. Oddly enough, his tone was normal and very human.

 "Heartbroken?" he inquired.

 Then, his armor crystallized instantly. As the crystals shattered, he was a new, fresh attire—a coat, a simple shirt, and pants.

 Still, Miu couldn't respond, frozen in place as she processed what just happened. But he didn't wait for her response. He sat down on the sand, propping one leg up, resting the arm casually on the knee. Leaning forward, he braced his elbow on the other leg, resting his chin on his palm.

 Eventually, Miu snapped back of it. She was a mess and tried to fix herself, thinking she'd been rude to him since he was presumably someone of high status at the base. She combed her hair with her fingers and adjusted her clothes, but she couldn't remove all the sand.

 The young man briefly glanced toward her, and before she could react, she was enveloped in light. It was warm and gentle. All the dust that stuck to her fell off—even all the sticky mess from her tears vanished, making her feel refreshed.

 "Cleansing magic…?" her soft voice escaped as she turned toward him. "T-thank you…" she managed to utter.

 The man didn't even turn her way as he watched the waves and the rising sun. "Think of it as an apology for startling you," he said.

 "Oh... okay…"

 The mood was awkward, and Miu didn't know whether to leave or not—I mean… I was here first… she thought.

 Miu was stubborn, and since the man didn't seem to mean her any harm, she sat down again, hugging her knees. 

 "…"

 "I… I am… heartbroken," she confessed.

 She didn't know why. But she felt compelled to reply to his initial question whether she was heartbroken or not—she wondered, was it really that easy to tell? 

 Still, who is he? Is he one of the sages? I mean… from what Luna has been teaching us, sages are the most powerful mages in the empire…

 "—Pathetic."

 Miu stiffened at his words, her eyes shaking as tears began to resurface. It was as if someone had twisted the knife that already stabbed her.

 "Y-yes… it is…" she whimpered lightly, tightening the embrace as she curled up even more.

 "Indeed," he replied, not even looking her way.

 "…"

 "It truly is pathetic."

 In that instance, Miu clenched her fists, getting slightly annoyed. It bubbled within her. She gritted her teeth as she looked at him angrily—but it all subdued instantly.

 "I get it… I know already… please… stop…" she sobbed as she began crying again.

 Miu was already spent—she didn't have the energy anymore. Not to even get angry for herself. But the white-haired man was harsh— 

 "Why didn't you say that from the start?" he asked coolly.

 "…" silently, Miu retreated, burying her face in her knees.

 "It's pathetic—never let anyone trample you, even if it's true. Do people have no dignity nowadays—"

 "Don't call me that…" Miu raised her voice ever so slightly. "I… I don't let others trample me… okay? I… I'm just deeply hurt."

 "Meaning it's fine to kick you while you're down?" he coldly remarked.

 "…!? Leave me alone! What's your deal!?" Miu exclaimed in frustration, glaring at him with fierce but teary eyes.

 The man briefly glanced at her, then back at the ocean. He shrugged. "There's nothing of the sort. I'm simply here to enjoy the nostalgic view."

 "Then why call me pathetic?! Why are you provoking me?!" Miu stood up, clenching her shaky fists.

 "Why, you ask?" he replied, looking straight into her eyes with his inorganic ones.

 As he did, it then became clear to her. The man didn't have anything that resembled their uniform or that he was from the military. Even her eyes, which had the ability to appraise anything subconsciously, told her nothing about him. But her whole soul could vaguely tell—the person before her eyes was the most dangerous individual she'd encountered since arriving in this world.

 "Who… who are you?" Miu asked, backing away slowly.

 The man didn't break contact as he got up.

 "I'm nobody important. But if you want to know—then… My name is Alester. Some also call me Executioner," he coldly stated. But seeing the fright in her eyes, he chuckled, amused by her reaction. "Fret not, I execute 'monsters,'" he added.

—Gulp

 "I-I see…" Miu managed to utter, wanting to run away and asking why her instincts didn't kick in much earlier.

 He crossed his arms, looking indifferent. "To answer your question. I suppose it is because I, too, am heartbroken. I'm merely selfish for wanting another heartbroken soul to stand back up on their feet after seeing them dwell—"

 "U-um… My heart was just recently broken… I don't think I'm dwelling or anything…" Miu interjected.

 "…" Alester paused.

 "…" Instead of being scared, Miu was now confused. "You're… heartbroken too? Ehe-hehe… it makes the two of us, huh?" a soft giggle escaped her lips.

 "It does… Hey, girl. What's your name?" Alester asked.

 Miu's eyes widen, surprised he'd be interested in a mortal's name. Miu smiled softly; tears still lingered in the corner of her eyes. Still, she introduced herself while not being able to hold back her laughter—what a strange guy… appearing from thin air, criticizing me out of the blue while trying to cheer me up in his twisted way? Then he's confused since he thought I was dwelling, but in reality, my heart was just broken! Seriously? What a jerk!

 "Njy~hihi~hihi~ The name's Miu! Miu Nanase!" she said, grinning.

 

A/N

I know, their backstory right after the rejection? Yes.