That would just upset him more. Cause thinking about it was giving him more anxiety. But he couldn't help it. He just couldn't stop thinking about it. And every time he thought about the idea of death, it scared him even more than he already was.
Death was scary. But it was a constant companion he had grown accustomed to. One that he could live with. One that always greeted him whenever he awoke and one that always left him feeling hollow and weak and useless. It was one of the few constants in life.
And he didn' understand what being a warrior did to you. Why were so many men so desperate to die? Because death was the one constant in life? Because they thought death was what kept them alive? Death had never been kind to Shiro or Lance. Or to anyone really. Not anymore anyway. Not when it came to life.
