With the week of prep time officially over; my new normal began. Mom had left late that Friday afternoon, and I had spent the rest of the day in my apartment. Well the rest of my weekend actually. My loner syndrome definitely settled over me in a hurry. All the shopping with mom had paid off. My medium sized 2 bedroom apartment was left very cozy, chic, and even had a little modern uptown girl flair. Thanks to mom AKA my personal fashion designer I had an attractive living room suit that was well played off of the kitchen/dining area. The two spaces meshed without blending to the point that it was cheesy. My bedroom was in a plum and silver. Thankfully we had already lost plenty steam when it came to the spare room which only sported the air mattress mom had used during her stay. Dad had called and warned he had better not get another alert about his credit card usage. So mom and I had the need for a visit to the nail salon and promised we'd be done.
Walking past "mom's room" I could still faintly smell a hint of the jasmine perfume she loved.
Honestly, I couldn't decide if I wanted to keep that door open or shut. I felt leaving it open would feel weird, but shutting it would have me paranoid. SMH....OH Gawd! This was only an issue because this had been the community my parents had picked. Seven minutes from school and gated. They didn't even care about paying an extra $350 a month for the extra bedroom. When my parents spoke with the apartment manager she said they were out of one bedroom rentals. Dad had said that perhaps I'd find a roommate, and mom thought it could be kept for when they visited. They did not like the idea of the co-ed dorms, and they were paying so I didn't get much say so at all.
Next thing I knew, Monday morning. I had scrambled 3 eggs for breakfast and had some pink lemonade straight from the carton. Hmph. I could see already that living alone wasn't going to be so bad. 30min after breakfast I had my brown contacts in and was wearing a pair of blue jeans, a white crop top and some Air Max. I had no intention of wearing the "outfit" my picked for my first day. It boldly yelled "I'm a spoiled brat and I think its all about me". LOL...if an outfit was capable of saying all that.
First semester wasn't terrible. It took a lot of getting used to; from doing my own laundry, dinner, dishes, and necessity shopping, to having to actually use a scheduling app. I had loved every step that had brought me closer to my dream job, just as much as I hated every assignment that had required teamwork.
My sophomore year was just as uneventful. My summers blurred into fall, then winter break, then spring along with spring break. Then boom! A few more weeks and I was halfway done. My junior year I received an internship with a marketing firm that specialized in transportation and lodging advertising. More than once I was asked when my dad would be in town for a visit. My boss's attempts to gain a contract out of my internship were anything but subtle. When I finally told Dad, sobbing and on the verge of a panic attack, he had asked me to quit.
Normally I would not have been nearly so obliging, but I was more than ready avoid looking in Stephanie from payroll's face again. Her mousy brown hair and matching eyes made me cringe at the thought of her. Stephanie had approached me...no cornered me in the ladies room at work as I had washed my hands. I had planned to eat lunch in the car and video chat with Kinsley. I saw him as a boyfriend even though he hadn't asked to make it official yet. Humming to myself as I checked my hair, I blushed when I caught a glimpse of the hickey down near my collarbone. Last night was unforgettable. Ever since week four of me working, and two weeks after meeting him, Kinny made it his business to stop by at least twice a week. He never stayed, but I understood his early morning shifts and long work days. Besides with me having class his leaving ensured that I got out of bed and into class every day. I had romanticized how happy mom would be to hear of how I had met the love of my life in college, my junior year, just like her and dad's love story.
If it hadn't been for her heels I would not have known someone entered. Too busy daydreaming to be in the present I guess. I looked up in the mirror and said "Hi" to the familiar face as I was about to turn the faucet off and step to the hand dryer.
"Going somewhere? Let me guess, you mutt breed slut....you must be going to get fucked behind the dumpster out back like the trash you are?!?" Stephanie had only paused a moment to make a shocked face with her mouth open mirroring mine. "Huh? What? Meee? Don't play dumb bitch. You. You are so freaking lucky my sister and I don't kick your little whoring ass all over the parking lot! Stay the hell away from her husband you bitch!"
I managed to get out a quivering "What are you..." "Oh no, don't play dumb. I'm sure Kin told you he's married. What? Did you think that because she's pregnant my sister is dumb too? Did you think he was going to leave his wife for you???"
Air. I needed air! Kinsley? Married? Wife! Pregnant?? I instantly felt nauseous and the acidic burn was instant as I vomited in the sink. Hot tears and my breakfast ran a race to escape my body. Just a few hours ago I had heard him as clear as day moaning in my ear how much he loved me. It was just last night I had decided that he needed to meet my parents and move in. Last night OMG! I wanted to swirl down the shallow sink with that last bit of pancake. This had to be a crazy joke. Was this the real reason he could never spend the night? I was such a fool.
Hmph! "You really didn't know?" I shook my head 'No'. We stood there looking at each other for a moment. "How old are you? 20? 21? Listen...I. I am sorry for... the name calling. Kinsley has been a dog since day one. When my sister called me this morning saying she had followed you here...I snapped. Kid, I hope he was just something to occupy your time while your boyfriend isn't available. Trust me he ain't worth you or my sister's tears. I personally want to kill the bastard."
Without uttering another word I had walked straight out of the restroom and went home. For the next two days I had called out sick, and when Dad had threatened to drive up to make sure I was ok; I had said I was feeling badgered about getting him to come in for a sit down. He will never know how much I had appreciated hearing him say I was not obligated to go back and that they were wrong for trying to use an intern for their own gain for added business. It was only a half truth. Things had gotten on the thin line of harassment about getting my father in for a meeting. There had been no need to mention Kinsley, or Stephanie, or the wife and their unborn child at that point. I just needed to suck it up and move forward.
I had been broken out of my shell just to be pushed into a pit of shame that was just beginning.
My senior year had been painfully quiet. Very few and far in between did I leave the safety of the apartment. I never saw the looks of interest I got from guys and I never fed into their attempts to flirt or get to know me. I felt like I was washed up and used goods already. My college experience had already proven to be way more than
Unfortunately, I had followed a pattern put into place by my mom. I had gotten pregnant my junior year. There had been a total of three times Kinny and I had not used protection, but every thing in me was sure it was that last night we had spent together. It had been so intense. From the time he had walked in my door he'd had a look of hunger, and boy did he satisfy it. Kinsley had grabbed me by my throat and kissed me like it was the first in years. His mouth had only left mine so that he could yank down my v-neck tee and bra. He had sucked my nipples and teased them with his tongue until my legs were shaking. I had barely felt his hand leave my tit and slide down my hip. My senses were already in a full on overload. He reached back and grabbed a handful of my ass with his large right hand as his left continued to restrain me by my neck flat against the cool wall. I could feel two fingers applying pressure right at the opening of my vagina. He had cupped the very bottom of me; almost as though I were sitting on his hand. With his arm snaked behind me I could smell his cologne and feel the clenching of his muscles as he simulated fingering me. My thin pajama shorts did nothing but allow the sensuous motion of him pressing upward with two fingers as he tapped a third on my already throbbing bulb. I felt light headed and could barely breathe. "Kinney please...." It had come out as a hushed and coarse whisper, but he had heard it. When he had finally lifted his head from my breast he said simply "You are mine! I want all of you." Looking me right in the eyes I saw that I could see my silhouette in his grey eyes. He was perfection. I had began to think this bright guy, who was so charismatic and charming would never want to take a brown girl home to his family. As I looked into his eyes I felt that resolve melt away. Kinsley had just said that I was his, and I was ready to allow him to take all of me and have his way. Because I was so breathless I could only nod my head in agreement. With a sly smile Kinsley had licked his lips and dropped to his knees. During the swift change of his position my pj shorts had gone down with him. On his knees he had only to lean forward to bury his face into my black panties. I watched through slanted eyes dilated with passion as he turned his face left and right against my mound. Kinsley took three fingers and hooked them onto the seat of my panties and snatched hard. The material had bit into my hip for just a moment and as quickly as I had been about to yelp from pain I was rolling my eyes back in pleasure. So caught up in the moment I couldn't care less that he had just tore my brand new $35 panties. I felt the urgent tasting of Kinny's tongue as he licked and tasted me and decided in that moment he was definitely a pro at it all. Again those two fingers came to assault me. This time with no material to stop them; my legs were spread and my hips were bucking as his strong two fingers finally made their way inside of me. I had never had this feeling before. Every experience with Kinny was new truth be told. I had been a virgin prior to our first night together. Even though I had no one to compare him to I was very sure that Kinny was definitely well endowed. As gently as he had entered me that first time; two days later I was still swollen and tender.
Tonight was very different. I was not being gently caressed and attended to. My man was in need and expected me to fulfill them. With one hand holding my lips open while continued licking away crazily; the other hand was sending two fingers up to what felt like the very core of me. Ohhh yesss...this was not what I was used to. The rhythmic movement of his tongue only switched when he had begun to suckle on my hood. Wildly I began to buck against his hand. He increased the strength of his thrusts again. I thought his goal was draw a climax out of me. I was wrong. He pumped and sucked until I was on the very tip...and stopped. He stood and turned me around so fast I barely got my legs to cooperate. His damp fingers that had just been holding my lips open now reached around to my front and roughly tugged at a nipple. The slick fingers that was just being rammed in and out of me a second ago were now in between us. I felt him rock hard against my ass check...but it was his thumb circling my anus with a strong hint of pressure that seemed to want in. It felt good, but I thought he was lost so I hiked my ass up against him more...trying to give him better access to pussy. I felt a shiver of desire go throw him. As he regrouped he mumbled "Cammy your mine" again and forced two of his fingers inside, but they had remained behind me. He held them still for just a moment. Realizing this was new to me and could be painful...he slowly pulled out and quickly pushed back in. I felt as if fire crackers were exploding inside of me. Equal parts pain, pleasure and surprise were drowning me. I believe it was about 10 thrusts later when I was released. Allowing the wall to stop my fall; I heard the unzip of Kinny's pants and felt the motions of him freeing himself from both pants and briefs.
"Turn around baby. I need you to put this in your mouth." I turned around with a steady throb between my legs. Another first. He had just requested oral. I wasn't against it. The opportunity just never presented itself. I leaned over and bent in half while turning my head to the side. As I opened my mouth to slowly take him in he was looking down and nodding at me. "Go ahead and get on your knees for me baby. Imma need you to wet it real good.
I had imagined it, but the actual deed was so different. His dick was so hard and thick the slightest push from him gagged me. I kept going though. Feeling the need to please him as he had just did me. "Do you like it?" I asked shyly. He was staring down at me with this intense look. " Hun? Do you like it?"
Before he acknowledged my question, he cupped my head between his hands and feed himself deeper into my mouth. "Mmm. Yes, but this is for you right now. You need to get it gooood and wet for you"
Very soon I realized why he wanted to be so wet. Kinny had pulled me up....by my hair practically and bent me over my couch. Roughly he grabbed a handful of my pussy and rubbed my natural wetness up towards my ass. "Stay relaxed. Let me do this. You'll like it ok, baby?" Even with how aroused I was fear filled me. His fingers already felt way too big, and I was a bit sore already. I just knew I was about to be destroyed.
I felt him rubbing himself against my ass. Already moaning. His arousal made me want to try it. He was such an awesome lover....nothing we had ever done was anything less than perfect.
"Let's go to the bed? Maybe I can rela...Ohhh damn!" I had looked up. My living room curtain was still wide open. My apartment faced a small eight car parking lot meant just for our three larger units all the way in the very back of the development. Normally it was just 4 vehicles outside: mine, two for the apartment in the middle, and Mr. Carver's truck. Mr. Carver was also the apartment manager. Tonight with the moonlight damn near being a flash light I could clearly see the lady parked in front of Mr. Carver's apartment, which faces mine. Backed in she literally had a front row seat to me about to be fucked in the ass! She had definitely been watching and when she saw that I spotted her she tried to duck down, but her brown ponytail, forehead and eyes could still be seen.
"Oh shit! Kinny wait somebody can see us outsi...."
"Ha! Looks like we have an audience! Relax baby, lets show her how good I'm going to open you up" With the shock of being eaten out, fingered in my ass, sucking his dick and now to know someone was looking as it all went down....the actual entry wasn't as bad as it could have been. I discovered I liked being watched. Kinny had told me to play with my breasts because that would help me relax. He massaged my hips as he slowly rubbed himself against me. He was on one. At first pushing and not feeling me open enough...Ptth... he had spit down on his dick to add a little more lube. I felt his strong legs widen which forced mine to as well. "Arrhhh!" He moaned. "Aahhh!" I yelled. He was in. I felt his throbbing inside of me. It was so tight I just knew I'd be torn. He kept going though. Tightly gripping my hips and telling me how much he loved me. I was intoxicated with the moment. By the second time he had spit on his dick I was taking it. Letting him thrust into me just how he wanted to. He had said I was his. I had to get used to this. I wanted my man satisfied. I allowed him to keep my hips pinned to the couch's back as he drilled me. His movement while he came was animalistic. He had growled and slammed into me with a force that felt as though we were going to break the couch. It was good, but I was glad it was over. I sneaked a peek up, and saw that that the lady was gone. I wondered who she could have been for just a second. "Lets take a shower. I wanna go again before I leave."
"Don't you want dinner?" I asked, barely getting it out. I had yelled and screamed my voice raspy.
The slap on my ass reminded me he had eaten already. It was three in the morning that last time I saw Kinny as he left. I had sleepily walked him to the door. "Mmmm. Gawd I wish you could stay. How can you drive?!? I feel ready to crash!"
"Me too babe. I need to get home and get some sleep before work. Get some rest"
"You were great as always, hunny. I enjoyed it all. Thank you. We are going to need a redo on Wednesday."
"Good night, babe."
"And we will eat first! haha. Im gonna need more energy!"
"Come on, babe. Its late. I gotta go."
I think that last sentence got my attention. He seemed withdrawn. By the time he gave me my forehead kiss though, I was ok. I told myself I was just being sensitive because I wanted him to stay.
I locked the doors after he left and crawled back into bed. Not in a million years or my wildest dreams would I have ever thought that 6 weeks later I'd be recovering from an abortion. An abortion that I had to go through alone. I had no choice. I hadn't dared tell my parents that their baby girl....the flunky kid that was all they had left had gotten herself pregnant by a man who already had a baby on the way with his wife.
Never in a million years.