Quite often we are watching the news and seeing tragic accidents happening or hearing from a relative that a family member has died. Have you ever thought to yourself, why do bad things happen to good people?
Well this is my story.
It all started with me. It was 2014, mum took me to the doctors every week, she was getting worried. She knew something was wrong. The doctor didn't know what I had, then after 2 weeks, he diagnosed me with flu symptoms. Every 5 days my brother Dylan would come home from school, he was in grade 10 and I was in grade 9. When he finally got home walking from school, he'd walk into the computer room where I was and he would say to me, "Ashton stop faking a sickie, I know your faking, you got to go back to school. " Then I'd reply, "Dylan I'm not faking, my belly really hurts and also my legs hurt when I run and Dylan I know I need to go to school but I can't just sit there in pain, it will be hard to concentrate." "Bull, your faking a sickie." That's all he would say in an unkind way. But he was wrong and the doctor was also wrong as well, I had something way worse than just flu symptoms.
A few days later I started to get bruises on my legs. For that one second, a terrible thought crossed my mind. I looked up at mum and said, "Do I have cancer?" I could see the worried look spread upon her face. Then she started yammering on about how there was no way I could have cancer. So the next day we went to go see my doctor, Dr Aung. We asked him about it, then mum asked if I could get a blood test. He agreed.
That day after seeing the doctor, we went to go get a blood test done. About 2 hours later Dr Aung rang mum up and told her to grab me and take me to the Townsville hospital straight away. As we were in the Children emergency room waiting, a doctor came in and explained some stuff that I can't remember and that's when she told us ' I had Leukaemia. After the doctor told us, mum started crying, dad was in shock and I, was numb and speechless.
That night we stayed at the Townsville Hospital. They took us to a room to sleep in before we went to Brisbane the next day. They took us to the children's ward.
The next day the flying doctors flew us to Brisbane. We asked how long we'd be there for. The nurses said we'd probably be there for 2 or 6 weeks. The nurses were very wrong about that. We were there for 1 year. The day that I was diagnosed, it was the 20th of August, 8 days after my 14th birthday. I guess you could say it was the worst birthday present anyone could ever get.
It's been 2 years and a half and I'm finally finished chemo treatment. Throughout the journey, I've been through some scary stuff, things a typical teenager shouldn't have to experience. There has been three occasions when I nearly faced death. The first time i had a fungal infection in my lungs.
The second was when I got the fungal infection in my lungs for the second time but it was a lot worse then the first. My fungal infection spread to my liver and spleen also and one night a nurse had to flush my portacath to clean it, little did she know, my infection went to my portacath and when the nurse flushed it, the infection went straight to my heart and caused it to slow down dangerously. The doctors and nurses rushed around me while I was out of it but my eyes were flickering, says my mum. The doctor had to fill a big ass needle with noradrenaline to speed up my heart, to save me. I didn't know this happened at all until my mother told me a year after I finished chemotherapy. That experience traumatised her a-lot. She nearly lost her daughter.
I remember thinking before it happened that I had to live and survive this for my brother. He was all I thought about whenever I took a turn for the worse. I'm very close with my brother and yes we may fight but it's always been him and I against the world.
The third time, I remember distinctly. One night I was in a lot of pain and I had a blood test that day. During that night after dinner, a doctor from the Ayr Hospital rang up and told mum to take me to the hospital straight away. When we were at the hospital and the doctor told me that my potassium levels were very low and if I didn't get a blood test that day, I would've been at home and my heart would've stopped while I slept that night. So that night while waiting for the helicopter to arrive, they were giving me some potassium liquid for me to drink to help build up my potassium levels. I got to tell you something, it tasted horrible, and it was absolutely disgusting. I'd rather eat the hottest chilli in the world than drink that again.
Through the journey I met some really wonderfully strong people, who all had different types of cancer. While mum and I were down in Brisbane, I finally got to meet my great Aunty Rhonda and Uncle Barry and my mum's cousins as well. I miss them a lot. I'm still in contact with the lady I met in Brisbane, she also has leukaemia. Her name is Tracey and she is a very kind lady, who lives in Mt Isa. While I was down there I met a girl named Sarah and her mum Kath. Sarah had the same type of leukaemia as me, we both have Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia, ALL.
During my cancer journey, I have matured a lot and even though some good things came out of having leukaemia, obviously some bad things came out of it as well. I missed out on school, I couldn't go to my student ball either because I was in Townsville getting chemo. I missed 2 years and half of my teenage life and I can never get that back. And going through that, makes me appreciate life more.
August the month that I got diagnosed in. That year in November, I was in remission by then. Remission means that I'm cured, but to be sure all the cancer cells were gone we still had to keep going on with the chemo.
There have been so many times I had to get a naselgastric tube because I couldn't put on weight. The nasal gastric tube, they use it to help you gain weight. Now when they give it to you, what I actually mean is that they actually put it in you. When they put it in you, the end of the tube goes up your nose, down your throat and into your stomach. How it works, is that at night you hook it up to a machine that pumps food into your stomach while you're sleeping.
A month down the track, since I've been diagnosed a friend came and visited me. Her name is Jewel. But half of the time she was there, I was in hospital. She stayed there with me some nights. One night when mum and Jewel where at the hospital with me, I got up to go to the bathroom. After I finished on the toilet, I looked in the mirror and started crying, I finally cried. That was my first cry, since I've been diagnosed. It took a while but I finally did. As tears where streaming down my face, I started going on about how I miss my long blonde hair, how I can't run anymore because I lost all the muscles in my legs and saying how I miss everyone back home. I cried so much in that bathroom, I thought I might literally drown in my own tears.
I really want to forget about this part of my life. This is the worst journey anyone could go through. But you see, I can't forget about this journey, this journey shaped my life. You know when you're a teenager and you go through something like this, you actually mature faster than normal. This journey made me wake up to myself, besides you have no choice in the matter. Through this journey I've experienced some pretty terrible stuff, no one should ever experience. When I was in hospital a few times, I heard from nurses that a kid died yesterday or that day. It's absolutely horrifying hearing that kind of news. Last month, February the 17th a lady I met at the units mum and I use to stay at, her names also Kath. Anyway that day, she died. She died of a fungal infection, she also had the same leukaemia as me. I cried when I found out. I feel terrible for her husband Mark, he must be in so much pain right now. You see what I mean, leukaemia is a horrible disease to go through.
Down the track, I lost one of the most precious things in my life, my friends. I was in Brisbane for so long, my friends and I, grown apart. Where ok now but, we aren't as close as we used to be. I miss them a lot.
Before I finish, there is one thing new child/teen cancer patients need to know when they start chemotherapy. It may take awhile for you to realise how much it affected you. But the one thing that affected me the most when I was in hospital sitting in the outpatients getting chemo, was the screaming of infants and children. To this day I still hear their screams. I cry when I think about it. Imagine sitting there with poison running through your veins feeling so weak and nauseas and all you can hear is, "Noooo! Nooo mummy nooo. It hurts! STOPPPP! Please Stop! Mummy tell them to stop!"
It broke my heart. The infants screaming their little hearts out, was just as worse. They were scared and hurt and I don't blame them. Two inch needles being prodded into them, nasal gastric tubes being forced up their noses and down their throats and then have poison run through your veins giving you nasty side effects. Like nausea 24/7, headaches that feel like your brain is about to explode, constipation, tons of blood come out your nose, mouth ulcers, pain all over your body, feeling physically and mentally drained and then your bones would weaken because of the poison. I had all these side effects and it sucked, big time!
And yes I was scared I'm not afraid to admit that, because I had to go through exactly what they had too but worse because of my age. I was in so much pain all the time but then there were times were it was so bad all I wanted to do was die to be rid of it. I nearly did. But I'm glad I didn't. I didn't want my family to go through a loss like that. It would've crumbled them, and I couldn't let that happen.
All through that, I kicked cancers butt. My family, I love you and thank you for all you have done for me while I was gone.