You don't have to constantly argue about how you want to be treated, if they don't show their love, then it's time for you to move on.
(Quote from me)
How beautiful Venice is. I am delighted with this city.
When I lived in Milan I had an almost slave job, I didn't have much time to travel if not to my house...
Four days go by and I spend more with Amanda than with Pietro, her uncle spent the two days busy, as did Pietro. But his grandmother is kind and his family is huge.
We had time together, we played chess, he is a terrible loser, I called my family and together we did face time to show the baby's first ultrasound, I felt so much more like a mother when I looked at those little pictures.
But even these moments were small, on the last day he had to do a photo session, which lasted forever, ''Rich people are so busy like that'' I think.
I miss my family, my grandmother's food, even Apolo, my aunt's gossip, but even for texting she didn't stop doing that.
Hours later:
It is evening, and today was an important game for Pietro and he won.
I am waiting at home, I made a macaroni and feel like a chef, put some perfume on me, and I see my cell phone ringing on the bed.
I unlock the cell phone and it was a message from Pietro.
[Pietro: Belle, focus meeting at Dieguito's house, I need to go, ask for a lot of passes, I promise to be early!]
I clamp my mouth shut, and feel like a fool, why was I even there? Would this be my life from now on? No Pietro and I would have to talk, but I feel my cell phone vibrate and I pick it up, it was a message from Amanda.
She explains in the message that her friend from Vogue was having her bachelor party, and she invited me. I don't know if I would normally say no, but Amanda insists that it would be good for public relations.
I look around that huge room, and I feel lonely. I roll my eyes and think "My options are to be alone in this huge house, since the employees have been dismissed, or to go to a place where I can't drink, and where the focus is on this.
But, I think about my dream of having my models, in a vogue fashion show, I even cheer up, put on some black sneakers and adjust my clothes, I go downstairs leaving a message for Pietro.
Amanda picks me up and the vogue editor is drunker than anything, I can't talk to her. Amanda is kind and offers me Coke, but I don't drink it. I'm afraid I'll get sick, I love Coke so much.
Looking at everyone there happily, I look down from the cabin, and raise my eyes in amazement, my hands grip the banister tightly.
I squeeze my eyes shut and my body shakes.
I see Pietro and a girl dancing, she is brunette, looks Asian. He puts his hands on her waist, and their bodies are so close that I feel my blood boil. I pull Amanda up by her blouse and lean her toward the glass.
I notice that all of his friends are there, I realize there was no meeting at Diego's house, and I feel my heart break into a thousand pieces.
She widens her eyes. - Oh my God. - She comes closer and looks at me, taking my shoulders, "I didn't know, I didn't, I swear I didn't know!
I smell alcohol coming out of her mouth, and I feel sick, that certainly wasn't the place for a pregnant woman, I excuse myself and walk out of there, I feel stupid and stupid.
Why lie about where I was going? What to say for half time, he couldn't have gone to anyone's house, hell! I feel my jaw trembling, and I go downstairs over the lights of the club leaving the box we were in.
It was all very confusing, asking Amanda's chauffeur to drive me home, but as I get into the car and close the car door, Pietro slams on the glass.
My eyes pierce his, I swear if I had my way I would pierce him through those windows. I take a deep breath and roll the window down, I don't want to make a scene.
He asks me to get out of the car, I get out of the car slowly and cross my arms over my chest.
- So, this is Dieguito's house. - I point my index finger in front of the club.
I sway, he stands in front of me in silence and his expression is like he doesn't know what he's going to say. He asks me to calm down, making my blood boil even more.
- Look, I came here because everyone came here. - He takes my face, and I take my hands away from him.
- And I asked you to come that time, and you wanted to stay home, I just came for a walk, I swear!
- Pietro, I'm not a party girl. - I cross my arms and spread my arms - ear-popping music, drunken smiles, nothing to do with me. - I put my hands together and lower my eyebrows. - My ideal Saturday night would be at home nestled on the couch, watching a romantic comedy or any other movie, with someone. - I bow my head and shake it, and finally say what needs to be said.
He takes my embrace gently. - So let's get to know each other, you know that this look we share, they don't say anything. But give hope that nothingness becomes everything. Stay, forgive me please. - He raises his eyebrows.
He's not making any sense, he's so nervous. It makes me nervous.
- What? But I did, and you lied to me. - I let go of his hands, I feel cold water dripping on me, it was starting to rain, he pulls me into the car.
I get in the car, and watch him get in, but I'm tired, my legs hurt, and I just want to go home.
- Pietro can't do it, you know I ignored all the signs. Ignored and look at us, you lie to me! I think maybe we saw things that didn't exist between us. - I lower my eyes trying to hold back the tears. - Let's have a baby, let's just focus on that. - I cover my face with my hands, I'm shaking.
- Forgive me, I don't know what came over me, it was just my old life speaking louder, but please help me to be better. - Pietro puts his hands on his temples, while looking at me with a face like a lost dog.
It makes me angry, his voice was making me angry, so many emotions and I get even angrier.
- What? No! It is not your "old life" - I say firmly, making the sign of quotation marks with my hands. - It never stopped being your life. And no, I can't help you to be better, you have to be better for yourself! I can't do that.
You know, I hated the "saving grace" novels, that frustrated me, when the good guy in the story only focuses his life on the girl, everything he does is undermined when she arrives, that's ridiculous! I think, a woman is not a psychologist, much less a rehabilitation clinic to "help him get better".
Where was the Pietro I spent that night at the party? The one at the chess game, a big drunken idiot, was standing in front of me and everything about him made me angry.
I hold my stomach. - I'm going back to my house today, and give me some time to myself, please! - Tears well up in my eyes, and my jaw is trembling, I'm having a crying fit.
Yes! and all I wanted was the warm cake from my grandmother, and the warm, nurturing hug from her, what have I done?
Pietro gets out of the car and faces the rain, the car starts to move and I am finally going home, everything about this car makes me claustrophobic, I grab my neck and undo one button of my dress.
Pietro gets out of the car and faces the rain, the car starts to move and finally I'm going home, everything about this car makes me claustrophobic, I grab my neck and undo one button of the dress.
I finally arrive at his mansion and don't care about anything else, just pack my bags and get out of there.
Amanda calls me, but I ignore her. Damn! The bags are too heavy, and in this huge house there is no one, I lie down on the bed and cry even more.
But I remember Amanda's chauffeur waiting for me outside, I go to call him in haste, and ask him nicely to pick up the heavy bags.
He comes and picks up my bags. Taking me quickly to the airport.
I have never been happy to fly economy class in my entire life, I was going home! Finally, home!
•.˚⚘ ⋆.*.ゞ
Still that night:
Pietro looked at her car disappearing in the rain and wrapped his arms around himself, he got nervous thinking he was not funny sometimes, he realized what a foolish thing he had done.
Before going to the club he thought "Maybe she would think I was dull, especially if I stuck it to her.
But nothing could justify the fact that he lied.
He sat on the sidewalk and didn't run after her to give her time to think, and in the blink of an eye for his own sake, he was alone again. His heart heavy with regret, he sighed feeling the cold Venice air enter his lungs.