Being born royalty wasn't all good sometimes. Especially when you were the eldest. And a princess, at that. I once thought I could be anyone I wanted to be.
But that changed when I grew older, when I learned that every action I took had an effect on the kingdom, no matter how small. It's like I was the one who held the pebble, and it was up to me whether I'd make a big ripple or nothing at all.
Every step I had to take was calculated. Every decision must be within my favor. It was like I was walking on a path littered with broken glass, and I had to tread lightly so I won't prick myself.
The expectations weighted on the shoulders of a princess was no laughing matter. But I loved living that life. I loved entertaining the envoys from other kingdoms. I loved performing in front of the courtiers and emissaries and officials.
I loved making our subjects happy, the light they could look at whenever there was a storm. I worked hard to excel in the arts—dancing, singing, embroidery, playing different kinds of instruments and many more.
In the middle of it all, I had felt like I lost myself. Trying to please everyone, trying to act according to their own versions of me. But it mattered less, I convinced myself, so long as I was of use to everyone. So long as I could be their light.
If I were to be married off, then I would lose my purpose. Running away would be the only option for my parents to realize how much they'd stand to lose if I was gone.
It was selfish, I know, and leaving my sisters to fill my place for the meantime wasn't really something I wanted to do. But then again, I had no choice.
I was pulled back to the present when I heard Ashton's voice.
"Did you enjoy the food?" he asked, a wide smile on his freckled face.
I lowered my gaze to the empty plate. We had steamed meat paired with egg soup, and I could say the meal wasn't half bad. Or perhaps I was just very hungry. I also noticed that this was a generous breakfast for mercenaries like them.
How rich was their patron for them to be able to enjoy a hefty breakfast and also get to live in this building that was almost as big as a manor?
"Of course, it was delicious," I replied. Then I turned to Lira who had just finished eating as well. "How was it for you, Lira?"
She shrugged. "It wasn't bad."
I turned again to Ashton. "She means to say that she really appreciates the food."
He snorted. "You're welcome! Lirajane's a funny one, isn't she?"
Lira glared at him. Ashton startled. I shifted on my seat, blocking her from his view. It wouldn't do any good if Lira were to pick a fight right now. My friend never liked having anyone other than me and Galen act so friendly around her.
I smiled at Ashton, and the surprise in his brown eyes faded. "By the way, what's the captain's name?"
"Ah," he scratched his cheek, "we call him Rasvien when there's no other people present. He usually prefers it that way, says being called captain is tacky."
The mercenaries had gone already gone out to do their jobs, the dining hall mostly empty and quiet now that there was only the three of us here. And with that, I could ask any Ashton question I wanted to ask.
"Rasvien, huh?" I considered the feel of the syllables on my tongue. It didn't even sound close to the Crown Prince's name. "How did he get to form the Ravens?"
"Oh, good question." Ashton set his elbow on the tabletop. "A few years ago, the Ravens only comprised of three members. Rasvien, Eury and me. It was up until recently that we grew to a number of twelve, and that's specifically for this mission we're doing in Evernight. The captain sends us to the forest by pairs, just so someone can have our backs, and vise versa."
Eury was the one who left together with Rasvien, so I guess that they were partners.
"You're here alone," I stated, "where's your partner?"
Ashton's hand flew to his nape. "Rylena left for another mission from the captain, but she'll return in a month. Either way, this topic is getting boring. I need to tell you this though, don't mind the captain too much."
"What do you mean?"
He chuckled, a hint of apology in his almond pupils. "I saw how he played around with you. He's like that at times, when something—or someone, manages to catch his interest. Rasvien is a kind person, he never means any harm."
I lifted a brow. "Did I truly catch his interest?"
Ashton touched his chin. "I think so. It's the first time in a while I haven't seen him looking so bored and emotionless. You know what? I hadn't seen him smile in years either. I mean, like a genuine smile. Not after—"
He paused abruptly, as if he'd realized that he was about to tell me something I wasn't supposed to know.
His smile was back in an instant. "No uhm, what I want to say is, don't start hating Rasvien for that! He's a warm person... like a bear."
I chuckled. "I agree with the bear comparison, but I've yet to find out if he's truly a warm one."
Ashton grinned. "Want me to help you with that?"
Suddenly, the plates and mugs clattered on the table as Lira rose to her feet. I thought she was annoyed again, but I saw that her eyes had gone wide.
Panic began to fall over her face, but she still managed to scurry toward the window opposite us.
"Lira! What's wrong?" I asked, moving to follow her.
Ashton, with no idea what was happening, fell into place next to me as we headed for the window.
"They're here," Lira mumbled, her voice shaking. "They've found us."
And the walls crumbled as I watched the rows of royal guards standing outside, bearing the crest of Orion.
"Huh? That's odd. Why are these bastards here?" Ashton grumbled, bewildered. "Last I remembered, we haven't been making any trouble for them in quite a while."
"No, I—" I stepped backward, beginning to tremble. "They're here for me."
Ashton faced me, confused. "What? Why would they..."
And then, his eyeballs nearly fell off when he finally realized the truth. "Y-you... you're a princess, aren't you?"