"What happened?" Belfire asked, his voice so soft and quiet, and she looked at him, seeing that warm light in his hazel eyes, nothing like the one in those dark ones she had just left behind.
"Nothing, it doesn't matter," she said, closing her eyes as she searched for the words. "You remember your promise to me? About Iris?"
It was a while before he answered, that crease in his forehead growing deeper, those eyes growing brighter. "Yes."
"Just promise me again… I just want to hear it."
"I won't let him stop looking for her, Phe, but nothing's going to happen to you."
She turned, looking up at the ceiling, a soft smile curling at her lips, a smile that was small, a smile that was sad. "It might," was all she said.
It was a few days later that their alarms didn't ring and those bruises on her wrists were healed so they wouldn't show when she left the house that evening. She didn't want to see him again, she didn't want to be reminded of everything that he'd said and everything he hadn't. And that part of Phoenix that had been lighter that Cassie was the one who came back with bruises and not her, now that part of her was gone and all Phoenix felt was small and stupid. He didn't look up when the car door opened, when they all slid in beside him without saying a word, his fingers flashing across that hologram keyboard, his eyes fixed only on that screen.
Phoenix felt those two sets of eyes that darted between their faces, looking for clues, searching for answers, and then she saw it, that soft smile on Cassie's lips as she turned to stare out of the window. Would he be calling for her more often, was that what that all meant, should Phoenix even care? She wasn't sure, all she knew was that she had to be stronger or she wouldn't be alive when he finally found Iris.
She watched that easiness spring to his face, his eyes shining, his shoulders dropping when the car door opened. How quickly he changed and wore that mask, had he just been wearing one with her this whole time too? Phoenix wasn't sure and she didn't have time to ask before he was gone and the guard held his hand up to keep them in the car and then pointed at Belfire.
"You come this way," he said, and they all froze, Phoenix's eyes flicking between that guard's face and Belfire's.
"Why?" she asked.
"New policy," he said. "Offenders go through a different screening."
She hadn't expected to feel that burning in the pit of her stomach, one so strong it had her gritting her teeth and a scowl springing to her face. All of this was for a name, all of it, none of it made any sense.
"No," she said.
"Phoenix!" Cassie snapped.
"No," she said again.
"It's alright, Phe," he whispered.
"You don't have to-,"
"Just go," he cut in, and then he smiled and nodded to her.
She wanted to stay, she wanted him to stay with them, but he only nodded again and she stepped out of the car. Before she knew it, they were through that large pod and through to the room with those two stone chairs, but they were empty. Cassie went stiff, her eyes darting around the room, and then she looked back at Phoenix and jerked her chin towards one of those chairs, but then they heard a hiss, the both of them standing together with their fists raised and ready, but it was only Willow, poor, broken Willow. She stumbled into the room, her eyes feral and distant, her chin slick with drool. Phoenix almost gasped, her heart aching, her eyes so heavy, but then she saw that flicker of light in Willow's eyes and she went still.
"Phoenix?" Willow asked, and Phoenix couldn't help it, she knew she shouldn't, she knew she was breaking another rule, but she went to her, sinking to the floor with her in her arms and pressing their foreheads together.
"I'm here, Willow."
"The Head-hunters are coming, Phoenix," Willow said, and Phoenix pulled away, wiping Willow's chin and shaking her head.
"They already did, we're in The City," she said, and she saw that flicker again, just a quick burst of light and then it was gone and Willow's eyes went hazy.
"The Head-hunters are coming, Phoenix."
Phoenix gasped, turning to Cassie, her face scrunched up in a wince, but Cassie shook her head and pointed to one of those chairs. There was something in Phoenix's chest, something heavy and sharp that ripped her to pieces and her eyes were stinging, her cheeks so wet and cold, but she didn't want to leave Willow.
"Oh, no…" Willow whispered, wiping Phoenix's tears with her thumb. "It's alright. You're safe, Phoenix, they won't get you. I'm older," she nodded, and then Phoenix felt that slice, her breath hitching in her chest, something warm spilling down her front. "You're safe," she said again, and then she closed her eyes.
Phoenix couldn't breathe, when she tried there was nothing but a strange, wet sound and something like a wheeze, and then she saw that fruit knife in Willow's hand, racing to her own throat, slicing across her skin as Willow tried to kill herself.
"Phoenix!" Cassie pushed Willow away, pressing her hands to Phoenix's throat to where Willow had cut it.
That was what had happened, Willow had cut her throat, Willow was trying to kill Phoenix, trying to save her from The City. Phoenix looked up at Cassie, not knowing what to say, not knowing what to do, only knowing that she didn't want to die.
"It's alright, Phoenix," Cassie whispered, and Phoenix saw her looking around the room for help, but then Cassie went so stiff, her forehead lining in a crease, and she closed her eyes. "I can't go back to the Fights," she said, her voice so soft and quiet. "I can't, you understand?" she asked, her eyes flicking open. "I-. You're taking too much," she whispered. "You're taking too much, Phoenix, I can't lose my title. I-," she started again, but then she let go, her hands covered in blood, that crease in her forehead growing deeper.
Phoenix knew that it was over then, that Willow had done for her what Phoenix had failed to do for Iris, and this was it. She tried to shake her head, she tried to open her mouth and tell Cassie how much there was still left for her to do, but everything was so heavy, so heavy and only growing heavier, and she knew that she was going to die.