CHAPTER 1: A BOUJEE ASS INTRODUCTION
"This ain't no ordinary story and it surely isn't picture perfect, but unlike most of y'all wh*res it ain't a fake life. Now I know unlike my Boujee ass friends from high school, I didn't really do that good in life and that's a fact though. But also unlike them, I ain't living a fake life like my main b*tches pretending to be happy and sh*t"
"Now don't get it twisted though, Me and these wh*res been rock solid from day one, well, we say day one but we know day one been only me and my Momma, and some b*tch-ass nurses delivering an ugly baby, Me. My girls came to join my life during high school, and we never looked back since, it hasn't been a brilliant school though, I'm sure you can judge from my English that I learned in the Hood. Hood gone teach you many things, including juggling men, stealing, or as we call it affirmatively repositioning and at times, hood teaches you that snitches get stiches, but hood gone teach you English too. Not as fancy as Delila Katanga's but Chile, lets get the story going."
"First and foremost, let me introduce you to my girls. We different in so many ways, some more visible than others, Like finances and Expensive mansions, but we tight and more similar on the inside. Let's begin off with Valerie Simons, now this b*tch is pretty, she always has that glow, and her hair long, I mean I always thought that maybe it's the money that makes her skin glow, because she is a CEO of one of the biggest Banks in Namibia, and the smartest amongst us all, well was the smartest, now she is in love and street dumb, she is Book smart though, and you better put some respect on her name. One thing for sure that I can attest to, as not only have I seen it, but I've actually lived it, this b*tch is rich and beautiful, as if that is not enough to make all Windhoek ladies Jealous, she married to a Business man, Steve. N*gga runs one of the biggest logistics companies in Namibia, Talk about god's favourite child"
"Then there was Anna Johannes, usually the quietest and well behaved of My girls, and one of the most hard working too. She is a registered nurse but due to the demanding nature of the house duties, and her believing that as a wife one must actually serve their man, she quit her work and is happy to be a housewife, well I don't really know if she is happy or not, I tell you this b*tches is plastic, lord knows that can never be me. She is married to a committed and successful man, or so it seems and he is hot too, I'll give her that, and I think that's why she sensible amongst all of my girls. I'm sure it got something to do with the D*ck. When you get good D*ck, you become sensible"
"Then we move on to my B*tch right here, Paulina Iipumbu, this Girl is a fighter, that's one thing for sure, she gone push everything she wants till she gets it, unless it's a man, lol, she terrible at that. Now remember when I said that I was the only one who didn't do good in school? I know you do, well, I lied, uhm… not really but I mean, even after Paulina graduated with her bachelor's degree in English, this b*tch still came to be a failed author, well, not fail fail as in Kids from Ella Du Plessis, okay, maybe fail is just too strong a word, lets just say she didn't do that great in life. She fooling everyone that her life in writing is going great but I know this b*tch be miserable and broke. Wondering how I know? I see her shopping next to my work place, Yes I have a job, you thought what? I'm a fighter too, ain't no way I was gone sit at home and wait for the man to provide, I'm not Anna. Back to Paulina y'all, Paulina shops at a thrift store, and will try to sleep with every man that comes along as long as he promises to fund her next book, I call her a wh*re with a dream, not to her face though, so this is between you and I. And who studies English anyways? What did she expect?"
"And then there was me Emma Ashikoto, hold up, I know you're thinking I made it in life Probably with the Mercedes and sh*t and having glowing skin but that ain't me, it couldn't be me even if I wanted to. But keep that Mercedes in mind, its an important part of my story. I'm the b*tch at the back of your mind, wearing a checkered shirt coming out of the bus, yes, my husband's bus, I know we ain't married, but we happy to live like that, who needs marriage when all e'm wh*res in my squad be married and miserable? plus what will I get from marriage which I'm not getting already? I'm getting good D*ck and one thing about good D*ck, it makes you cray also. So this is my work, I'm a cashier at a shop in Wernhil, don't feel betrayed now, I dint tell you I had a good Job, you assumed yourself. Let's rewind a bit back to the beginning of my day"