Kaara found herself in a dark, and gentle place. The essence of absence and the comforting numbness of the void enveloped her. Her mind was foggy, and moving was like floating through space. She could not gather her bearings.
Something was seeping into her mind, subtle and intoxicating.
There was no up, down, left, right, near, or far. She was falling and flying at the same time, going in every direction at once, and yet nowhere at all. She looked at her hand and tried to count her fingers, only to find she could not. Her hands blurred and smudged like oil paint when she looked at them. They were pure white, contrasting the absolute darkness around her. She waved her hand in front of herself, almost mesmerized by how it shifted and trailed.
When she finally looked up, she saw someone curled up in front of her. The sound of crying filled the void. Its form shivered and shook, it was cold, skin covered in scars and fresh wounds.
She'd had this dream before. And everytime she experienced it the details got sharper.
It's bony rib cage expanded and shuttered with each shallow breath it took. Every shaky breath in was a whimper, and every breath out a cry for help. Unlike Kaara's unstable form, the person in front of her was vivid and detailed.
It was as if it belonged here.
This place of absence was its home. It was mumbling to itself, its shoulders heaving as it wept. Kaara moved forward to comfort it even though she instinctively knew what would happen next.
With each step, however, Kaara's body moved backward. She stopped in place and tried to call out to it only to have her words snuffed out. She shouted as loud as she could, but not a single sound resonated.
Gone… all gone… Again
The words reverberated inside her mind and echoed around her. The wind was sucked from her lungs. Thick ebony tar consumed her and pulled her down as words pierced through her mind.
Failed, hollow, vessels. All gone. Forgotten.
Her lungs were burning. She kicked, and struggled, each movement driving her deeper into the blackened world beneath.
Mountains of failed husks, not fit for God.
The tar rose and covered her face. Her lungs screamed in pain as she tried not to breathe.
I don't want to forget… please… don't make me forget.
A new voice resonated in a low baritone, which sent painful chills down Kaara's spine. It laughed,
At last, I've found you.
Kaara gasped, the tar filling her lungs. It slid down her throat, filling her stomach. Was this what it was like to drown?
She jolted awake to a thunderous BOOM! nearly coughing up a lung.
She looked around, were they being attacked?
The tent flashed, followed by another loud BOOM!
It was just a thunderstorm.
Kaara went back under the covers, only half awake, It's okay, it was just a nightmare.
She pulled her legs to her chest; they were ice cold. I didn't have the covers on. It's fine now, I'm safe now.
She looked around and noticed her mother had already left their tent. When she heard someone moving outside, she pulled the furs over herself and pretended to be asleep. She heard a clap of fabric as they hugged together.
"How is Kaara?"
"She's gone to sleep. What's happened?"
There was a pause, "We didn't lose anyone, but those with major injuries are on their way to Yvian as we speak."
"How many?"
"Nine."
"Should we call for assistance from the noble houses?"
"You know better than I do that they'll take any excuse they can get to take our independence as a tribe. We can't rely on their power lest we become indebted to them."
"You're right, but what are we going to do? With Kaara's curse-"
"Hush!"
Kaara felt her stomach jolt. Her father had keen hearing. So powerful that he was listening for her heartbeat to see if she was sleeping. She used her magic to slow her blood flow.
Curse? What curse? Kaara had never heard she was cursed before.
"As strong as we are it attracts more of those monsters to us just the same," her mother said.
"Better they come to us than a defenseless village where they can gorge themselves and grow their numbers."
"But if we fight ourselves into exhaustion we will simply collapse. Then what?"
"I'll die before that happens," Her father said firmly.
"That's what I'm afraid of, Septis!"
"We've been over this already, Tika. What else would you have me do? If the others know, then how long before some rogue comes along into our tent and finds Kaara? And if we leave her in a city then that city is as good as doomed as well."
"I know. I do."
"The best we can do is protect her while we search for a way to break it. We've saved countless lives thanks to her lure. Plus we've found Loktiir's codexes haven't we? Have we managed to decipher them?"
"Nothing we've deciphered has been useful so far, and we don't even know if it ever will."
"It's our best hope in a long time. Now please, let's discuss this later."
"You're right, you're probably tired. Sleep well tonight."
"I'm sorry, I know I promised-"
"You needn't apologize to me, my love, I already understand. But Kaara was waiting for you all night. She didn't even eat the Malaki stew Tiksu made."
"It's that bad huh? Fine, I suppose I deserve it."
"You don't carry this burden alone. Get some rest and worry about it tomorrow morning."
"Thank you."
Kaara heard them hug tightly to one another before her father entered the tent. Kaara was choking back tears, and she couldn't hold her heartbeat much longer.
Her father's hand laid across her shoulder, "Kaara?"
Now was her chance. She pretended to jolt awake.
"Are you alright?"
"Papa!" Kaara wrapped her arms around his neck, and buried her face in his shoulder.
Her father combed his hand through her hair, "It's alright, you're okay. What's wrong?"
"I w-was s-so scared."
"About what?"
Kaara could sense his nervousness. Even if he was a shrewd xio, Kaara knew what he wanted to hear, "B-Bad dream."
Her father relaxed, "So that's what it was. I heard you didn't eat. You were worried sick for me huh? But it's alright, it was just a nightmare. I'm here."
Kaara hugged him. Her father could hear the tune of her heart, and always knew if she was lying. She'd stopped lying to him a long time ago, but she'd occasionally allow him to believe a different truth instead.
She looked up to the xio, seeing how tired he was. His shoulders were sloped, and his usual energetic steely gray eyes were dimmed and dulled like an old blade. She stayed there in silence with him for a moment.
"Come, let's go back to sleep shall we? I'll be right by you, okay?"
"Okay."
Kaara once again pretended to sleep, waiting for her dad to fall asleep. How long had she been cursed? She lured Malaki?
She could understand her father's mindset. Among the xiozians, the Tibur Clan's founding purpose was monster hunting. Anyone could join the clan so long as they passed their sacred ritual. Entire kingdoms had risen and fallen to Malaki. The world itself had been put under threat numerous times by Malaki who had gorged themselves on the souls and power of their victims.
But it was the Tibur who devoured them. They were the ones who cleansed their corruption and hunted them wherever they rose up. There was no clan, group, or army more well suited to killing Malaki.
But the people in her tribe who died fighting them. Was she responsible for their deaths? Would they blame her in the afterlife if they knew? Should Kaara blame herself for something she had no say in?
Kaara promised she'd hang upside down by her tail for a long long time while she pondered this. And that thought alone was as comforting as it was silly.
When she could hear her father snoring she knew she was good to go. She wiggled out from under his arm and exited the tent.
This morning was a lot like the last one. The sun wasn't up yet and the dirt beneath her bare feet was still cold and damp. It was silent as a painting and far more vivid. The entire world seemed to be sleeping except for her.
She sprawled out atop a stone in the center of the camp. Should she tell her friends? Should she hide it?
Just like her dad, Arik could hear when she was lying. And Rorik knew her so well even if she didn't lie she couldn't keep it a secret for long.
Maybe she should avoid them?
But that would make them even more suspicious.
Maybe if she told them it wouldn't be so bad.
But Arik's parents had been killed by Malaki when they were young. What if Arik hated her for that?
Rorik could keep a secret. Maybe she could tell him at some point. But only if he asked, and only if he promised to keep it a secret.
The smell of stew hit her nose.
"Couldn't sleep?" Tiksu said, offering her a bowl.