If you like music while you read, try "Hello Lovely" by The Likes of Us. It's what I was listening to while writing this, and it's a perfect reflection of Tarkyn's heart for Harth!
*****
~ TARKYN ~
Her fear yanked at his heart, pulled him closer. Tarkyn made a low, pained call in his throat and hugged her tight against his chest. "Are you certain, Harth?" he whispered, his hand curled around to cup the back of her head. "Are you truly certain? I don't want to choose a death sentence for you—"
"But now that you're here, I wouldn't want to live without you anyway," she said, half-laughing, half-fighting tears.
Tarkyn pulled back, everything within him trembling as he searched her eyes. "I don't deserve this from you," he said solemnly. "I haven't earned it. I haven't yet proven myself to you."
"Yes, you have," she said, putting a hand to his chest. "I can feel you. I can feel the good in you—the strength. I can feel your love—Tarkyn, can you imagine how that will feel when we complete the bond?" She was breathless with it—clearly terrified of the consequences, desperate to do it anyway. His heart began to race as he stared at her—the impossible rightness of her. And then he felt her, reaching for his mind, and he opened to her immediately, desperate for her to see the truth in him—to feel the wave of love and certainty that washed through him every time he looked at her.
She spoke in his head and the intimacy of it stole his breath. 'I'm here, Tarkyn. For you. I felt you and had to find you. You're mine. I can't deny it and I don't want to.'
Tarkyn groaned, yearning to show her the shape of his heart. But before he could find the words, a laugh of pure joy broke from her throat.
"I can feel you," she whispered, her eyes closed and a brilliant smile on her face. Tarkyn drank in that smile, contrasted in his mind with the images he held of his own desolation, the way he'd break without her.
And the simple bliss that echoed through him when she was close.
"That's it, Tarkyn," she whispered. "That's exactly it. Whether it's your bond or mine… it's here. Between us. That can't be a mistake… can it?"
"No," he answered immediately, determined. Certain. His conviction was immovable. "You're absolutely right. I feel the same way. We both want the same thing, Harth—to be together and safe, our people safe, our offspring… for all of us to be at peace. That can't be an accident. The Creator brought us together. We have to trust that."
She nodded, but he dropped his chin, frowning. Because which of the bonds they experienced, the effects it would have, they likely couldn't know until they'd already given themselves. And the idea of waiting any longer for that… it made Tarkyn growl.
"What is it?" she asked hesitantly.
Realizing he'd growled in truth and she was worried, he snapped his eyes up to meet hers. "We can't figure this out, Harth. But I don't think we need to. I think… I think we have to grasp what we've been given. And I want to."
Her smile returned and it filled his heart like a cup. He stroked the hair back from her face. "I want to honor you, but… I can't see how… with things as they are," he breathed, searching his mind—the flames and smoke? The tradition of the powerful or soul-bonded Anima is beautiful, but it takes time to organize, and would Elreth even allow it? Not to mention that the fighting involved… he looked at Harth's joy and remembered the tension she'd had, her wariness of the other males. He couldn't put her through that.
He cleared his throat. "We have traditions, ways to mark the bond and… demonstrate it to others. But our ritual, the flames and smoke…" he looked up at her, warily. "I think that wouldn't be good for you right now. And Elreth… I don't think that's an option as things stand."
Harth watched him nervously. "Tarkyn, what—"
With a glance over his shoulder, down the trail to where the Guards were positioned, unseen Tarkyn pushed to his feet, pulling her to stand with him, then ushering her back into the cave—not deep within it, but to the space in shadows, just outside that swathe of moonlight on the ground. The guards could likely still hear them if they chose to, but he wasn't ashamed of what he would say—he only wanted it to be intimate to her.
"Trust me?" he murmured.
Harth nodded without hesitation so, holding his breath, he kept his eyes on hers as he unbuttoned his own shirt that hung to his thighs, then flipped it back, off his shoulders, and let it fall to the stone floor.
Then, slowly, so she had time to resist if she chose, he took hold of the fur wrapped around her shoulders and slid his hands under them, pushing them back and away, letting his fingers slide only to the back of her soft shoulders. Harth blinked, but a second later, let the fur drag from her hands so it slid to the ground, fluttering along her curves as it fell.
Harth's eyes widened, but she didn't speak. Tarkyn blew out a breath, then knelt to gather the waterskin from near the furs, his blade that he praised the Creator Elreth hadn't commanded the guards to take from him, and chose a long, thin taper from the stack of wood alongside the wall of the cave, laying the tip of it over the red-hot coals so that it flared into flame, but leaving the rest in the dirt. Then, holding her gaze again, he positioned her next to the low flames and stood in front of her. Harth's eyes were wide, but her lips smiled. He leaned down to kiss her quickly, a sip at her lips, but his blood turned to flames to overwhelm the cave fire when he did it.
"Harth," he said breathlessly, "I made my vows to you when I recognized the bond, and they were true. They remain true… but I would make them again. Now. Knowing what we know. Feeling what we feel. I don't know what journey the Creator intends for us, but I know I want to take it with you at my side."
"Me too," she said, biting her lip and swallowing tears of happiness.
Tarkyn smiled and stroked her face. "Then hear me, my love." He took her hand and placed it on his chest, flat, right over his heart. "Feel me, Harth. Know that I am true. Because I will vow myself to you for eternity—to the bond, to offspring, to the death. I have waited for you. I don't want to wait any longer."
He heard her breath stop as he knelt, humbling himself, but still holding her hand to his chest. He couldn't let her have even a moment of uncertainty of him.
"When I took the vow to give my life in protection of the Queen, I was true to it. And that will remain. I cannot… I cannot take steps to harm her, or our people. I will defend them and I will not regret it. But you… Harth. You own more than my body. You command more than my time, and strength."
He looked up at her, his eyes burning with love and an earnest plea to her to believe him. "I would give you the vow of my very self, Harth. And I pray you know I'm true. I would give you the vow of a soldier to his Queen, and I would give you more…"
And so, he cleared his throat to remove the pinch of emotion, and gave her the echo of his vows as a soldier—and more. Because she commanded more. And as he did so, he prayed fervently that the Creator would never ask him to betray one vow in order to honor the other—because she would win.
It would be the tearing of his integrity as a male, but he would do it.
She was more than duty. She was the other half of his heart.
He swallowed back the fear, and focused on his hope as he picked up the waterskin first. "Hear my heart, Harth. Because I give it to you."
*****
CELEBRATE WITH ME! I'm releasing side stories on my other BEAST books tonight--include "Rise of the Dark Alpha" which is Zev and Sasha's story. Even if you haven't read their book, just check out the side-story in Rise of the Dark Alpha (right at the end of the story) It will show you the events from the earliest chapters of THIS STORY from their perspectives!
If you're a fan of the BEAST series, you also get side-stories on Falling in Love with the King of Beasts, and Taming the Queen of Beasts! These are PRECIOUS chapters to me. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!
And finally, don't miss the mass release HERE tomorrow to celebrate Tarkyn going premium, and the NEW EVENT WHERE YOU CAN EARN A TARKYN PROFILE FRAME!!!