" I won't.... but Aiden will"
I watch as horror grows on their shameless faces and can't help but burst out in laughter.
It made my heart calm to see them that way, I feel uneasiness and peace at the same time.
A peculiar sensation in me.
"W- what do you mean by A-Aiden will?" The lady gulps.
"Mmmmm. You'll see in a minute babes" I reply mockingly.
I point the knife in Aiden's direction. "Aiden... Baby, I'd like you to come here for a sec."
"..."
I sigh as I lower the knife slowly. "Once again it seems like you do not know the situation you're in I-"
"Why are you acting this way?" He interrupts.
"What?"
"Why are you acting this way, this is not who you are..."
"Aiden you seem to be misunderstanding this obvious situation, but as you can see I'm literally holding a knife-"
"You knew I was slipping away from you, yet you pretended like you didn't know anything, you always had this fake smile on your face trying to hide your pain, I could see it every day. You've always been the type to not speak unless it was necessary, you never opened up to me, you knew I didn't love you anymore... But you always kept quiet... Why?"
My heart sank.
But why is he right though?
I knew he didn't pay attention to me anymore but I tried to ignore it,
I tried to ignore the pain... My ignorance led to where I am now.
"you're quiet because I'm right aren't you?" He walks up to me and brushes his bloody hand against my face. "You know you only have me right? you have nobody else in this world to fend for you." He leans in closer with his bare skin touching my clothes.
I stay frozen like a statue, shocked by his words but also more shocked that was right. I have no one except him, a dog, and my dying uncle. There is no other person that I have that isn't either dead or dying.
Why am I this hopeless?
Why can't it all just end?
"Just give up Alesha." He whispers. "Just accept the fact that I don't give a damn about you and move on."
Move on...
Move on?
Move on????
Don't give me that shit, I can't move on!!!
My chest tightens, and my eyes start to water.
"D-do you know how MUCH I've been through all my damn life?!" My voice starts to crack as I speak, I try as much as possible not to burst out crying.
"Do you want to start this pity part all over again, with your family being massacred by childhood, bla bla bla" he stares at me with disgust in his eyes. "is there anything else you want to talk about that this annoying batman backstory of yours too?"
Hurt.
Sadness.
Confusion.
And anger.
So, so much anger.
All these emotions trying to burst from my skull,
I can't help it. I can't....
I take the knife with both my hands and lift it,
It just takes one swing for it all to be completely over.
Why am I complicating things when I had the answer right in front of me?
And with every single ounce of strength in my body.
I take a massive swing.
'Mom, Dad, Femi, Fola, Ade.... I'm coming home now. Just wait a bit okay'
"..."
Is it over?
Am I dead?
I can't feel any pain.
Is it shock?
What is this?
I'm feeling something warm on my arms, this warmth...
It's been so long since I've felt this sensation before...
"Ma'am, what do you think you are doing trying to commit suicide?" A stranger's voice asks.
"huh?" I open my eyes and to my surprise, I see a masked man, dressed in all black standing in front of me, having a firm hold on my arm.
"Hey, um, you weird naked couple." The man continues, " I have this weird hunch that this is happening because of you, but I suggest that you leave now or it wouldn't be only that hand on yours that will bleed" he scoffs.
"But this is MY house!!" Aiden yells " W-Where did you even come from?!"
"That my friend is really not important right now, what really is important is the fact that I am holding down the woman who tried to kill herself in your bedroom" the man reminds him. "No matter how much you explain, how will it look to the police and public my friend?"
I keep my head down in shame while Aiden glares at the man.
"You can do whatever you want to do with her, it's not like I care anyway" Aiden sighs. "Come on Eva let's go, I have some spare clothes in my laundry."
She quickly runs to his arms,
He embraces her and kisses her on the forehead, looking directly at me while doing so.
He then gives a little smirk "Goodbye Alesha, it's been nice" taking the woman's hand, walking into the hallway, leaving me all alone with the strange man,
'It's funny how I loved a man like him really' I thought.
I look over at the man, who already seems to be staring at me, with such... Beautiful eyes.
They look so comfortable,
Yet so mysterious.
He let go of my arm and used his other hand to take the knife away from me. "and I'll be taking... That." He then drops it to the ground. "didn't you know knives are dangerous."
I look up at him, tears filling my swollen eyes, "I-im sorry"
"why the hell are you apologizing? They did this to you, didn't they? It isn't your fault." he replies.
Tears start pouring down my eyes, my voice breaking with every word, "I... I'm sorry."
"..."
"I see the uncomfortable look in his eyes, I try to suck it up,
But it just keeps pouring.
"I'm sor-"
He pulls me into his warm embrace, "Shhhh... You look like you would need one right now, don't say anything and just... Accept it"
I try to speak but nothing comes out,
Only tears,
A cry for help,
Cry from regret.
But it felt warm somehow,
It's been a long time... I cried like this.
I must've forgotten how it felt like,
To be with someone when I'm in pain.