Claudia
I could feel my heart beating in my ears. It was irregular. To the point where it scared me.
I don't know if it was because it was my first day, but that wouldn't have made sense. I usually was less nervous and more nonchalant when it came to first days. The last time I was this nervous for a first day was my first time nursing somebody. Now all I can feel is this deep anxiousness that causes my palms to sweat.
I've only dealt with a number of families and patients, and he was no different. So why was I behaving like I have never done this before?
The one that thing on my mind was that I hoped he didn't know who I am. And, that he wouldn't notice my anxiousness.
Then I hear Mal's voice in my head. "He doesn't know what you look like,"
"He can't possibly know what you're like, the only thing he knows is your name,"
She was right. It wasn't possible.
I had to stop stressing because there was nothing to worry about. "Ms Ramirez," My last name rolls out of his mouth so smoothly. "You can call me Claudia," I smile nervously.
"Well, Claudia," He tilts his head. "May I ask why you're so tense?"
Oh he did notice.
Yay.
I struggle to find my voice, partly glad because I did not trust myself to speak. I did not trust myself to do anything at this point. I bit my lip as he made a move. My nose catches a whiff of his cologne and I can't help but inhale the husky scent with satisfaction. "You don't need to worry about anything. The elevator incident? I already forgot about it,"
I freeze.
No.
You have got to be-
Oh, I can't wait to tell Mal she was wrong!
I would've been more prepared if it wasn't for her. But I go with the one thing I can muster up once I find my voice.
"About that-" He cuts me off.
"You don't need to explain yourself," he then says. "I'm glad we can both forget about it and move pass something so irrelevant," I say.
There's an empty silence when the words came out. A short lived one as a matter of fact because the edges of his lip curl up and I witness his distant grey eyes flicker in another direction. The sight was captivating to say the least. His Adam's apple on full display.
"I couldn't agree more with you, Claudia," I'm about to nod and make peace but he isn't done.
"But your taste, darling-- it's out of this world," I stand there, confused.
What?
He seems to notice my confusion by my silence.
"You're trying too hard with the perfume, you might wanna change it,"
□□□
Luciano
The hot water makes contact with my bare skin and I feel my body relax. I exhale, getting lost into my darkness.
"I love you,"
"You promise?"
"Promise," She smiles and then she realizes. "Okay fine, I promise," I peck her forehead and wrap my arms around her. "l love you," She says again. "I love you more,"
I feel my eyes burn, my nose crinkles and I blink away the tears that were threatening to escape my eyes. I get out of the shower cubicle, and grab the towel that was always on my left.
"You are a few meters away from your bedroom," I hear the robot. Just hearing the voice makes me clench my jaw. I untie the watch and toss it somewhere in the room. I hear the sound and walk to wherever I hope my bed is. "You are close to your bed,"
"SHUT UP!"
A satisfying silence settles and the robot listens. I feel my chest heave up and down, and I begin feeling hot. I feel my body make contact with something hard, I feel the doorknob on my lower back.
I hold onto the doorknob tight, my breathing uneven as I feel myself so close to collapsing.
I start to feel as if my head is spinning.
Not again.
□□□
Claudia
My belongings were packed, my grandmother and best friend were here but I still felt incomplete.
Like something was missing.
I get up from the bed I now called mine and walk over to the dresser. I grab my pastel green robe and cover the parts of my body that were exposed. I walk on the cold tile with nothing but socks. I twist the doorknob, and step out of the room. I'm completely lost once my eyes flicker to every door.
Which one was it?
One of the men had told me, howcome I had forgotten.
Stupid.
There were multiple doors and this wasn't even half of the rooms.
Right or Left?
Come on, Claudia, think. My eyes catch the last door on my left, but also a black painted door on my right.
Right or Left
Left or Right.
I keep on thinking,
which one?
If I get this, I might be a genius.
So I go with left, something over there was calling me.
What if it isn't left?
But I walk there anyways, turning a left as I walk over to the last door. My palms are sweaty, and this all feels like dejá vú in one day. One night.
I lift my fist up to knock but I can't seem to have the courage to knock. My fist remains still and so do I.
I sigh. This is useless.
Why am I even doing this? All because of a nightmare? Come on now, Claudia.
I can do better than that. I don't need to do this. So I back up. I drop my fist and exhale, taking a step back.
And as if it were fate, the door opens and I'm met with his stormy orbs that seem so far away. He doesn't even look at me as his eyes flicker elsewhere. He inhales slowly and he twitches. His actions are distracting and I don't even know if he realizes that. "Do you need something?"
I nearly stop breathing.
I-
What should I say?
"No,"