" don't you remember" I couldn't talk properly or eat properly, I got mood change and even got nastier character, I couldn't get a hold of myself or move about freely, I laid on bed all day but I don't wanna end like this, a light knock as the door creak open "hey Sir um I just wanna get u some creams to lick " I reach out from the cup but I couldn't seem to grasp it, checking the calendar I only had a week left " u know the oncologist just left, he said u do get anaplastic" wow, he just s smart guy "W..wh..at t..t. th..e" my voice came out shakily "Shesh I do feed u the creams "he smiled gently pressing it on my lip, I had completely lost my senses, I could taste pain or sourness or sweet or bitter, it was just plain "hope u love it, I make it myself " he smiled warmly, been with him for a long time and he had grown quite attached of me "d.d…don't grow too attached to m….me "I do stammer in a husky voice but now I just wanna give him hope "wanna go somewhere " somewhere, for the past weeks I haven't been outside, I don't even know how the outside world is anymore, the world seem so small to me " do u know Ral " Ral the name seem familiar, and I could faintly see a vision " the girl u do fall for, wanna see her again"
"f….fall I..in l..love with a g…girl " I got upset at myself for forgetting her "u always told me tales about her and her much u love her but both of u got some kind of brain cancer, hers was malignant but urs was the main deal "his reply was so smart "n..nerd" I Chuckle softly ignoring the constant headache that pound me "u in stage four of ur illness " he stared at the calendar ,his face saddened "s..t..age four…. W…ha..t t…..t…hat " my nervous system have somewhat be impaired and I have lost sense of everything, I always felt nausea, weak, tire and mostly spent my day sleeping or half dead, my muscle had lost its strength but my facial never change, I was still the gloomy,dark guy " y..you re…mind him… Me.. Of..someone" I do stammer again "hope u liked the cream " the little kid smiled at me and come to think of it I never ask for his name "n...n..a..m. e" he smiled at me " I can't get tire of telling u my name, the name is Holly " I chuckle up a bit tapping his hair as he snuggle in not minding his hair pulling out " I love u big bro Zeke " he do dive in for a hug, squeezing out my lungs " I… I… L..o..v..e yui" I stammer shakily "l..l. ove ,I re…mem..ber her ..n..ow she.. got the prettiest smile….and I do…see her in my..dreams....she do always nag me…and shout at me…I was… I… Was… I was..just a jerk to her but…she loved me anyways.." I smiled remembering her memories as he snuggle softly " tomorrow is Sunday u do follow us to church right " he smiled brightly as he close his asking eyes "u cozy and warm and really comfy like a pillow " he snuggle on holding me "yeah" she do said the same words to me "R…Ral… M… G..on..na…be..with…u…soon" closing my eyes, remembering our memories, I do always forget her but the little kid always got a way of reminding me bout her and m grateful for it
"God Love is faithful, it is patience, it does not hate or envy, and when you die, you gonna get judgement for everything you do done, and when God gonna ask u how u spent the life he gave u what u gonna tell him " the homily was speaking directly to me, and though I could hear mildly I do get the message as the priest preach in his usual black American tongue " I..i… Wanna go home …back to the place we fell in love in… " I said to no one in particular as the little kid held on to me, supporting my movement " it time for confession " the mass was offered for the sick, those in critical health condition, bout dying, the orphanage was a living hell and the priest do do confession every Sunday after service " f..f..a..ther…i.. K..no..w…i..si..n..b…u…t…i..w.a.a..n. na...a…p. o..l..ogize… I…d..id…c..ur. se God a little…had….l..o..t..of… Sex..fuck…but..m..s..o. or…ry" I felt much better, like I do go to heaven, I never believed in church or God, I can't remember much but I can remember her and how she do always tell me that Jesus loves me but I always told her to fuck off, got mad at her " let's go big bro " he held on to me, helping me up, I couldn't see the priest face "hope u gonna see her when u gone "a tear trickle down his cheek but I couldn't wipe it off "y…yeah"…..
CHAPTER SIXTY NINE
"taxi"
"u won't see "
" can u remember the name of the place "he do hoard down a taxi " yeah down the mountain or up the mountain "the driver ask sarcastically "R..R..rare.. " my lip was shaking and so was my whole body vibrating " that place "the driver did know that place but come to think of it, it a known place "that place they do bury people in, they have a cemetery, they are killers, so why would u take a poor kid with u "he said arrogantly hitting the brake and spending up "Now what should we do " escaping from the orphanage wasn't a difficult thing but this time I walked right outta the front gate "we trek" the little kid to reply "we gonna make it there on time before u die ,u gonna be buried by her side"
"h..her..wh..o..the..her" my head was spinning and my kneel Cap was weak " u still got some of ur energy bars " he dab his hand into my pocket feeding off a energy bar, tossing some into my lip "I know u don't feel or can't remember a thing, just don't forget ur love" he held on to my hand " let's go big bro " he pressed his phone smiling at me " we go north of left " he smiled at me, taking all this risk, walking in the woods with a complete stranger "l…let…res..t…h….er…e" I do stammer with my legs shakily "yeah sure, let me find where to camp at sunset we move off to see ur love "his tune was teasing filled with excitement "t….t..hank u"
It was December already, m finally back here, my therapy do end " Cindy always loved the snow" stepping into the place, our favorite school ,the faces was different and not friendly "Marcel" a familiar voice called out "Miss Priti how is everyone, what of Izzy, Cindy and Josy " I do ask excitedly "they are all gone " the words that flew off her lips was like sword, I couldn't control it "gone" falling back on the cold ground remembering the last conversation I do had with her, Cindy, her voice was pleading but I kept on blaming her, kept on hurting her "Cindy is gone, how bout Zeke" the words flew out from my lip " he is.." she didn't finish when the gate flung open, it was a little kid with a guy, I could recognize his face, seeing my friend and losing everyone I ever cared bout, that ever made me me, I couldn't handle it anymore " please take him to his love "the kid that was with him announced as he fell on my hands, he couldn't move or stand still, he couldn't think or say a word, his face grew paler, he was cold "Zeke" I fought back the tears as it rode down my cheek freely "I.i..know…her..she..my.. Ral" the words bringing back happy memories as he close his eyes, blood didn't spill but he was gone "Zeke, Zeke, Zeke " I fell on to the ground once more now willing to move as people flung around us to see what had happened, I was screaming and rolling helplessly, hitting things but no pain could ever relieve me the pain I ever lived "can't believe we all shortlived, we all meant to die but why didn't I go with them "thoughts bout Cindy dying without saying goodbye terrified him " itz over for me " I got everything I wanted in life but my heart was dark as I pulled at my hair, hitting my fist on walls " I just need a greater pain to ease me off this pain "
" seem like u really close to my brother " the little kid that had brought him acknowledge "yeah " he held my hands smiling at me "let go make sure he rest near his beloved " his words race back to my love story one I will never forget the words…
EPILOGUE
You know when you love someone you got to let them go if they are meant for you they do come back to you and she did, this place bring back sad memories the girl I loved I turn my back on her and now she is no more I just wish I could see her how much I love her ,how much she means t