Life sucks. And there's nothing you can do except make it suck less.

That was the motto that Felix Boone had stuck to his entire life. And he always tried his best.

Except, of course, today. Because life decided to say fuck you.

Why? Because when Felix finally bit the dust due to a chemical explosion. Life decided to throw an Uno reverse and reincarnate him.

All of which brought us to this very moment.

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"Congratulations! It's a healthy baby boy!" A loud voice exclaimed, snapping me to reality. I blinked multiple times, the bright light shining into my eyes without warning. My eyes focused and I saw my hands. They were chubby baby hands. And that's when it clicked. I started scowling.

'WHAT THE HELL?!' I screamed internally. This was not a happy moment for me.

Just as I was about to go on a mental rant, I felt my body shift, and suddenly a new person was holding me.

It was a woman, she had luscious black hair and deep red eyes that contrasted against her dark skin. Her face was slim, with her eyes slightly slanted, like a cat's eyes. However contrary to her villain appearance, she looked at me with love. 'I guess this is the woman who birthed me... god that is so weird in mental images...' As I was gagging internally, the woman looked at me in concern.

"Is it normal for a newborn to be scowling? Is he in pain?" She asked, apparently speaking to someone else in the room, I suspect the nurse who helped birth me. 'God I gotta stop thinking that...'

"I don't believe that is normal..." The nurse said, "Oh! Maybe he is just taking after his majesty, your royal highness. If so, there is nothing to worry about!"

The scowl I had deepened. His majesty? Your royal highness? What's with the titles? Speaking of, where even am I? I tried to turn my head but to no avail. Newborns don't have enough strength to even lift their heads, much less turn them 90 degrees.

But from what little I saw, it was like a sort of rustic design, but with gold everywhere. Like those shiny places, the ones you only see in mangas.

Before I could ponder more, the door slammed open. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a tall man, but it's too blurry and I can't see his details.

Loud steps echo throughout the room and stop at the side of the bed where the birth giver is.

"...Is this him? May I hold him?" Mystery man said, but from the soft tone of his voice, I will assume he is the father.

I am passed to father man and he holds me gently. It seems like the man has never held a baby in his entire life and is terrified of breaking me. And honestly, I believe he probably could.

As he looked into my face, he scowled. And now because he scowled, my scowl deepened.

"Is he supposed to be scowling? I don't recall ever reading about that..." He said, still scowling by the way. I now know why the nurse lady said it was because of him I scowled. It was probably a normal thing. For him at least.

"It is probably due to yourself, your majesty." This time I could see her, and she looked nervous.

As the nurse continued to be in fear, I stared at my new father, taking in his details. He had black hair too, but more like a Raven's feathers type of black, it fits well with his mid-tone skin. But it was his eyes that shocked me the most. He had bright golden eyes. The color scheme fits well with his angular face and slanted eyes.

It seems like father has finished his staring down at the nurse because he turned to me again—this time, without scowling. And before I knew it, I stopped scowling myself, replacing it with a neutral face before starting to giggle. I can't control my facial expressions for long in this body. That's when father began to talk.

"He's quite cute... Felix... Felix Von Regulas. That will be his name." He smiled, albeit a small smile. "Welcome to the royal family Felix."

That name... I've heard that name before... But where?

"That's good and all dear, but both me and Felix need to rest now." Mother interjected, she looked ready to stab someone and I had a faint sense that it was father whom she was ready to stab.

What a nice family dynamic...

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{-3 years later-}

I am currently hiding on top of a tree. I had managed to ditch my guards and they are probably freaking out right now. It's been 3 years since I came to this world. I've learned to love my new family, they're much better than my old ones anyway.

Father is usually working. Since he is the king after all. Mother works as well, but not as much so I see her more often. And while coming to terms with this whole reincarnation thing, I've realized why this world felt so familiar.

This is the world of an otome game. Specifically, one that my female friends used to play. They called it "Bloody Love" or something. I was forced to play the game myself of course, since I was the only one left to play it.

The game itself was super interesting. It was set in a medievalesque kingdom and the heroine has all these capture targets and stuff, you know, the basic otome game. But what set this game apart was the fact that you, the heroine, had the option to either date the capture target or kill the capture target. In the route of reverse-harem, you could even kill all of them!

The CGs were especially gorey on those parts, but the best part? It was all voice-acted. And the audience loved it. So much so that the makers of the game tweeted if they were all alright. They probably weren't but who cares.

Point is, it was violent. And when I played it. You better bet your ass that I completed all the routes.

I got all the CGs and all the voice lines. Even the hidden capture targets!

Ahem, I got sidetracked. Anyways, this is an otome game world, even if it's a little fucked up. So, you got the characters.

First, you got the main capture targets, the ones on the cover of the game. You have the crown prince of the Albeign Kingdom, Charles De Albeign, the heir to the magic tower, Quin Eltra, the personal servant of the villainess, Lumere, and the heir to the Von Sweet's duchy, Claude Von Sweet.

And second, you got the hidden targets, the hardest ones to complete. The weakened demon king, Ubel Tozrith, and the one, the only, crown prince of the Regulas Kingdom, Felix Von Regulas!

Anyways- Those are all the capture targets, but what about the antagonists? Well, there are 2 antagonists, only one of them shows up for almost every character, and if you go the reverse-harem route, you just get an encounter with both of them.

For the Albeign crown prince, you got Penelope Von Sweet, the original fiance. In the normal route, you have to fight with her to gain Charles's love, and the way you do it is by having solid arguments in a battle. However, in the killer route, you team up with the villainess to end the backstabbing cheater's life after Penelope finds out he has been flirting with other girls and not keeping faith with his fiance. The ending for that route was brutal!

The magic tower heir is a little different. For this one, you got the older brother, Ares Eltra. This one is more or less an inheritance battle, with the older brother being outdone by his younger brother. In the normal route, he just tries to prevent you from getting together with him since he'll be happy and stuff. Things are a little more tricky with the killer route though. Since as soon as he finds out, he'll try to stop you in any way possible. This route ends with both of them getting killed if you play it well.

Lumere's route is more or less the same as the prince's since Penelope will try to prevent you from associating with "Von Sweet's property". In the killer route, she'll always try to prevent you from killing Lumere, this one also ends in both of them being killed.

And finally, Penelope's older brother, Claude Von Sweet. Penelope has the spiel about not mixing commoner's blood with the duchy, she'll try to prevent you from gaining his love as she thinks it'll stain the bloodline. The killer route here is the same as the one for Ares.

The hidden capture targets are a little more tricky. With Ubel's antagonist basically being himself and Felix's antagonist being the transfer students who came with him. The killer routes aren't available for them sadly as Ubel will always catch you and Felix always surrounded himself with guards.

Honestly, the real badass of the story should be Penelope since she has to deal with all the crap the heroine puts her through. A true legend.

My thoughts were interrupted as I heard someone call my name.

"Sir Felix! Hah- There you are! We were looking hah- everywhere for you!" The knight looked like he had run a marathon from the way he was panting. 'Was I already gone for that long?' I thought to myself as I climbed down the tree.

"Sorry, I got bored and you wouldn't let me use your sword." It was technically true, I did ask to which he responded no.

"Please sir, hah- at least tell us where you go hah-..." The other knight said. Geez, he looked about ready to die from heatstroke.

As I thought about that, I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflection of a lake nearby. So I ran towards it. Catching the knights off-guard.

I stopped at the edge and peered in. I really did have my dad's features, albeit with more baby fat and a darker skin tone. I had the same Raven's feather hair and the same golden eyes. Though my eyes were almond-shaped. I really did look like a cute kid.

As I was doing my inner monologue, a voice called to me.

"Felix dear, why do your knights look like they are about to die?" It was my mother.

"They were trying to find me, I was in a tree," I answered. "They didn't see me up until a minute ago."

"Oh my, do be careful. I wouldn't want to replace your knights already if do die."

'Yep, a really weird family dynamic...'

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