"It gets better, you know." Gabriel continued to speak. "The grief, that is."
"So they say."
"Are you getting any help? Counselling? Therapy?"
Claire scoffed at a suggestion.
"It might help." Gabriel added.
"Help what?" Claire asked sharply.
"Help you. Everyone breaks once in a while."
"You still think that I'm crazy, don't you? But what if I am right? Did you ever ask yourself that? What if the crazy person is right?"
"Every day." Gabriel admitted. "Hence, I am a believer in what I see."
"I am aware." Claire nodded. "And all you see is lies and people trying to hurt you. It must be quite sad to live like that."
"You know what I did after my mum died?" Gabriel asked.
"You were angry at an entire world and decided to beat up your father at her funeral?"
"Exactly." Gabriel was put off the fact that she knew even though he barely remembered glimpses of it. "That anger takes a lot of energy. It is all consuming. It's a distraction from the pain. But it can be often misdirected."
Claire wiped yet another silent tear off her cheek as her eyes were on the smiling picture of her mum. It was quite an old photo as it was so hard to find a photo where Leanne was healthy enough and smiling.
She didn't anticipate Gabriel's hand on her shoulder as he awkwardly tried to comfort her. That just made her sob violently. Gabriel sat down beside her. They sat down in silence for a while as Claire tried to regain control over her ugly cry. Once her sobs quietened, Gabriel spoke again.
"She looks like a kind person." Gabriel pointed at a photoceramic image of Leanne.
"She loved you as her own." Claire mumbled. "She risked everything to bring justice to those that were harmed. And then she paid a price for it."
"How?"
"She worked in a pharmaceuticals company. The company mishandled a lot of chemicals. Once she found out, she spend a lot of time gathering evidence and she ensured that it was going to be brought to an end. As a result, during that time she was exposed to benzene which was later linked to her non-Hodgkin lymphoma. She had a transplant nearly two years ago now, but after a few months post the transplant she started to get worse again."
Gabriel's eyes were glued to Claire.
"I'm so sorry for your loss." He repeated as he reached out and squeezed the back of Claire's hand, awkwardly taking it away moments later.
"I cannot take it anymore, Gabriel." Claire said quietly. "I cannot take it when you are so close and so far out of reach. I cannot deal with your indifference if you mean everything to me. I cannot cope with your coldness when I remember that you've made me feel like I was your everything. Part of me hopes that you truly do not remember me rather than purposely push me away, because right now I need you more than ever before, and if you were to push me away now, you would be the cruelest person I know." Claire stood up and faced Gabriel. "But I know that you aren't cruel. I know that you have a good heart. I know you. And I know you better than anyone else. I saw you at your most vulnerable. So, if you truly have forgotten me, I cannot be near you, because I cannot turn your memories back on, and they live inside of me, reminding me of how much I have lost. I remember our nights together, I remember when we've listened to the same music, when we read books together, when you hugged me so tightly as if you never wanted to let me go… and now…" Claire wiped yet another tear. "I do not know what happened to you. The last thing I've remembered was when they took you while your father shot me. Then I woke up in some facility in Switzerland where they've told me that I am someone else over and over again. And when I came back, you were different and you send me away. I am not Elise Cooper as much as I pretend to be her. I am Claire."
Gabriel watched her in silence. Claire Thompson. The person that father earned him of was right in front of him. And she was hurting.
But there was another realisation as he sat on that bench.
His gaze went to somewhere behind Claire. Claire followed his gaze, several rows away from her mother's grave was a white marble gravestone with 'Claire Elise ///// Thompson' engraved on it. 'Moore' was erased.
Claire forgot all about it. And as her eyes landed on the stone, she started laughing hysterically. The entire situation reached a whole new level of ridiculousness.
Now, Gabriel was never going to believe her. "It used to say Claire Elise Moore née Thompson!" She shook her head. "It's empty. Dig it up if you wish."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that I had to fake my death before to save you and that grave over there is empty. Whilst you thought that I was dead, at one point you were arrested for trying to dig up my pretend grave because you believed that I was alive, rightfully so."
Gabriel's mouth dropped open, but no sound escaped his lips. He closed it again and looked down as he collected his thoughts.
Claire looked back at Gabriel. "Gabriel, promise me that you will be happy." Claire said as she picked at her fingers.
"I will try."
"And take care of yourself." Claire placed her hand on his shoulder. "I am so glad that your shoulder seems so much better. I cannot believe that you do not need the brace anymore. I am so happy for you." She took her hand away and planted a soft kiss on Gabriel's forehead. Then she turned around and softly she placed her hand on Leanne's gravestone. "Bye, mum." She said quietly before she walked off, leaving Gabriel alone in front of her mother's grave.
This encounter mad wit clear that she couldn't stay there anymore.There was nothing holding her back in that place.
Following that day, Clair managed to secure a work transfer to another Crimson Tech office in San Francisco, hoping that the new place would bring her more peace.