Kasis opened his eyes sleepily, a sliver of sunshine falling across his thin face. He shot up in his bed, panting. Almost immediately he was overcome by a wave of nausea, his vision swimming and his head pounding. He winced, caressing his head. With fumbling fingers he found he found his head and eye wrapped in bandages. Over his eye was a piece of thick gauze that was wet when he touched it. With shame he realized he been crying in his sleep. The memories came rushing back and new tears leaked from his good eye.
He looked around, finding himself in his own home, a balding old doctor snoozing away in a chair by his bedside. He tried to stand, but another wave of nausea knocked him to his feet. He crawled to the chamber pot and heaved, the little food he still had in his stomach making a reappearance and leaving an acidic taste in his mouth.
He went around the partition to get a cup of water, intending to soothe his dry tongue and wash away the last of the vomit. He found Soli sitting at the dinner table, his head in his hands, staring at a knot in the wood blankly. Kasis joined him after pouring himself a glass of water, sitting across from him at the table.
For a while, they sat quietly, not looking at each other. Eventually Soli stood and put a kettle on the stove. A few minutes later he handed Kasis a steaming mug of tea and sat down again.
"Kasey," he began, "I am so, so sorry. If I had gotten help faster maybe-"
"No," Kasis said, his voice cracking. "There's no use in pity, apologies, or what-ifs. They won't change the past." He took a sip from his tea, which was bland and watery. "Nothing will."
"Kasey-" Soli looked him in the eye, his face full of regret.
"I said no." Kasis stood, biting his lip so that Soli wouldn't see it quivering, and turned away. "I'm going for a walk."
Kasis pulled his cloak from its hook, tearing a gash in the hood. He put it over his shoulders, the familiar weight settling on his neck. He didn't bother with shoes.
He padded barefoot through the patchy grass around to the back of his home and sat with his back to the wall and wrapped himself in the cloak. He pulled his knees to his chest, covered his head with his hood, and let out a gasping, painful sob.
The tears fell down like rain, his chest heaving painfully as he gasped for air. He gritted his teeth and screamed, his frustration and anguish tearing open the silence of the morning. He gasped for breath, choking on his sorrow, his whole body trembling. He didn't care who heard him, he didn't care who saw. He had nothing left to live for but a worthless friendship and a petty crush.
When the sun reached its zenith and he'd run out of tears, he opened his eyes. Through the tear in the hood of his cloak he saw the Ivy, its tangled vines swaying gently in the wind. He stood, pushing his long, black hair out of his face, and wiped his nose on his sleeve. Captivated, he stepped closer. Even if the Ivy was a murderer, it really was beautiful.
Almost as if it had heard his thoughts, the Ivy rustled is leaves as if chuckling. One vine untangled itself from the fray and reached out. On instinct, Kasis stepped back and reached up to cover his face.
The Ivy seemed to wilt in response, the vine curling back shamefully.
An idea blooming in his mind, Kasis to one last look and returned inside.
He found Soli and the doctor sitting at the table drinking tea. Soli patted the chair next to him, inviting Kasis to sit.
"So?" Kasis said after resting in the chair.
"You've obtained major damage to your right eye and recived a mild concussion," the doctor explained. "You will probably always see poorly from your damaged eye and the wound will likely leave an unsightly scar. Thankfully, the eye was not completely split by the knife, and the two halves were still connected at the back when I inspected them. I performed surgery to try and seal the cut. Only time will tell if it will heal enough to function properly."
Kasis nodded. He had expected as such.
"For now, you will rest. I advise you go straight to bed and sleep until morning. It will do you good." He began to pack various tools in a black briefcase as he spoke. "Soli has volunteered to stay here during the night. Good day to you." With that, the doctor left the friends alone until morning.
"Well, you heard the man. Off to bed with you," Soli said, but his usual charm was gone, and his gray eyes revealed his smile as a fake one.
Kasis grunted and went to his bed, not removing his cloak. As he laid on the flat mattress, his thoughts went to his mother and sister. However, he did not feel sad or even angry anymore at this turn of events. All that was left in his heart was echoing lonleyness and an empty feeling deep as a chasm, so dark it could swallow him whole.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
The next morning, he awoke before the sun. He lit the little oil lamp that Rie used to read at night. he carried the lamp around with him to the other side of the partition and poured himself a glass of water. when he turned around to return to his bed, however, he saw a person-sized lump laying on the floor. in the dark, it reminded him of-
His train of thought was cut off as his vision turned to red and his breathing grew shallow and ragged. he dropped the lamp and his water with the sound of glass shattering and put his hand to his ears, visions of blood and turmoil writhing behind his eyes. he squeezed them shut and dropped to the floor, rocking back and forth like a madman.
He felt comforting arms around him as he waited with agony for the visions to pass. When the real world returned, the sun had risen and Soli was cradling him to his chest. As soon a Kasis opened his eyes, Soli flushed red and looked away, a strand of white-blond hair falling into his light gray eyes.
Clearly very embarrassed, he began, "I woke up, and you were on the floor crying so I thought I would comfort you..."
Kasis reached up to his face and found his cheeks wet. He pushed himself away from Soli and wiped his nose on his sleeve. "Thanks," he muttered. "I've been having a rough couple of days."
"Well," Soli said, stretching, his ears still red, "I'm supposed to make you breakfast and change your bandages. Doctor's orders."
Normally, Kasis would have laughed at the awkward look on Soli's face, but now he couldn't even crack a smile. "Last night I thought I saw a body."
"Probably just me. I guess I am a body, just not a dead one." Soli shrugged as he put a pot of water on the stove and dropped some bandages in it. "I slept on the floor last night."
"Why on earth would you do that? There are two perfectly good and empty beds on the other side of the partition."
"Well, I just thought that since THEY slept in those beds it might be rude or intrusive or something and I didn't want to be that guy..."
"Hey," Kasis said, "It's okay. don't worry about it." His voice cracked a little, so he quickly averted his eyes and blinked rapidly to banish the sudden tears that threatened to spill out.
"Anyway, my mom dropped off some food this morning since you have literally nothing to eat in this house." Soli moved the pot off the stove since the water had begun to boil and started on breakfast, throwing a bunch of seasonings in a pan coated in butter.
Kasis frowned. "Soli, she didn't have to do that-"
"Yes, I did. SOMEONE has to feed you, and I can't just leave you here."
"You're already taking care of me, the least I can do is pay for it."
"Yeah, sure." He smiled mischievously. "So do you have any money?"
"Uh, well-"
"I thought so. All according to plan," He laughed. "You can pay us back later if you really want, but don't worry about it."
"Fine."
Soli nodded and began chopping up sausage and vegetables from his mom's garden and put them in the pan with the butter. "Sit," he commanded Kasis as he fished the now-cool bandages out of the pot. He began to unwrap Kasis's head with gentle hands, but made a face when he removed the bandage that was holding the gauze to Kasis's eye.
"What?" Kasis asked, worried.
"I think it's infected, it's really red... That damn doctor put unboiled bandages on you! Probably didn't even wash his grimy hands, what a scam..." He continued to rant about sanitation and germs while he wrapped Kasis's eye in new bandages. "Everyone knows you have to boil bandages in mint water to clean them! So incompetent."
"Maybe you should be a doctor, Soli. You'd be much better than that scumbag, for sure."
Soli smiled as he served up Kasis's breakfast and brought it to him at the table. "Eat," he demanded as he continued to work on his patient.
Kasis ate quicky and quietly, adjusting the angle of his head when requested so Soli could wrap him up easier. when he'd finished, he was hungry for seconds, but did not request more intentionally. he'd done a lot of thinking the night before and, well, he don't want to waste food.
When Soli finished changing his bandages, Kasis announced he was going to get some fresh air. Soli smiled and told him to be back by noon. He nodded but didn't met his friend's eyes.
"Thank you," he told him as he pulled on his cloak, "for taking care of me."
"Uh, sure," Soli said, a little put off. "Don't mention it."
Kasis nodded and left his house without shoes again, knowing he wouldn't see this place ever again, nor any of the people within the clearing, for that matter. He raised his hand in farewell before heading around the back of his toward the Ivy, stopping just out of its reach.
"Well," he said, "This is it. I don't have any reasons left to live anymore. All my family is either dead or imprisoned, I don't have any money, or a place to go, And no one will hire me. No one wants damaged goods.
"I wish I could have paid Soli back... hopefully he'll take the house. The family he's sure to have will have a great life there, much better than mine."
He sighed and looked at the sky. "I won't miss my life. wherever I end up after I die, I won't miss living.
"I'm ending this now. Wherever I go, I'll be a burden. This is the best way."
A gentle breeze lifted the edge of his cloak. "You'll eat me. You're the Ivy. And then it'll be over." He inhaled and steeped forward.
"I'm ready."
The Ivy curled around his ankles and knocked him to his feet. He didn't struggle. He let it drag him deep into itself, his cloak tearing off and his skin shredding on rocks and roots. His head bounced along the ground, a massive headache blooming between his eyes.
But he did not struggle.
When he finally skidded to a stop, he opened his eyes and looked up, weary and bleeding.
He was in a clearing, but not like any he had seen before. There were trees all around the edges- Real trees! The ground was covered in plant life and fallen logs, where red-capped mushrooms grew. Dappled sunlight streamed through the canopy of leaves above him. Curling vines of Ivy grew up every tree, but not nearly as thick as the wall around the clearing. It was covered in white flowers the size of his hand, with bulbous red fruit growing in the center. Emerald leaves fluttered to the ground, completing the gorgeous atmosphere with a magical touch.
In the center of it all, standing- no, HOVERING above him with her head slightly tilted was a little girl with silky blue and purple hair, mottled medium-deep skin with lighter shapes around her eyes, and glowing, fluttering purple wings.
The girl frowned and furrowed her brow.
"Who in the Ivy are you?"