Why does everyone expect everything from women? Why do women need to sacrifice only? Even if it's a small thing. Why does society make our life suffocated? I don't understand why every liberty is given to men and not women. Women should wake up on time early in the morning, they cannot stay awake till late, they should know how to cook and not just know but be a gourmet cook, they should know how to sew and the list goes on. I just don't understand why men are given so much liberty just because of their gender and masculinity. Men can stay outside till late, men can wake up late, men can beat, can do whatever they want and just get away with it only because they are men and not women. Why do we have to always specify gender roles and not give chance to individuals for just being human, to live their lives as they want and give them some space?

My name is Navera and I'm frustrated because I can't just get what I want. My family doesn't understand that I need my personal space to breathe and feel my life. These questions were always popping up in my mind but now they are just bugging me. Everything is getting out of my hands, and I feel frustrated with severe headaches because nobody can understand even if I want to give words to my thoughts. Everyone takes my perspective as negative and wrong for a girl to speak in such a manner.

Sometimes I also wish being a man would have made things easier for me. No matter how hard I try to satisfy people, I end up not satisfying them. All my efforts are not seen and neither acknowledged. At least see the efforts and love that is in every action. My intentions are not known to them but I am a very positive person who loves to counsel and motivate people whereas I find it hard for myself to deal with the current circumstances. If I can motivate people, at the same time I also require motivation for my problems.

Catharsis is helpful and sometimes I do it by crying my heart out but oftentimes, I am unable to cry even and everything just wells up to the throat making it difficult to breathe in such environments. Today, I cried after a very long time and still wish to continue to take everything out of my heart and speak it out to my Lord but I am not so fortunate as I cried a little bit. I wanted to give words to my thoughts and mind but I was unable to. I sometimes feel that there is a sea of emotions inside me which is veiled, even for me. Why do I think that I cannot understand myself nor can anybody else understand me as if there is no relation offering such comfort or solace, be it a mother, father, brother or sister?

Frustration helps us think about things which we might not have taken into notice thus, sometimes it's important to feel every emotion and understand it. Navera spent an entire Sunday thinking about such thoughts and matters which might seem trivial to others but usually they are not. As it destroys the mental peace of a 25-year girl.

I wrestle with current opinions,

As my mind differs,

I am lonely, as a lonesome fish in the entire pond,

I stand all ALONE,

Trying to give words to my thoughts,

Sometimes I BURN, Sometimes I'm SCARRED.