Arya was absent minded throughout all her classes for the morning till it was lunch break.
She was practically dragged to the cafeteria by her friends.
Everything that's happening lately between her and her brother is just too much for her head to carry.
She knows that she feels something for her brother, but at the same time also doesn't want to be true to her feelings and be condemned and discriminated by the society, and her parents will be so disappointed and disgusted by her.
It's just too much for a modest 17 years old girl like her.
All she knows is that she feels something, something deep, something dark, something erotic, something that is never going to be accepted by the society.
You are so messed up Arya," she screamed inwardly at herself.
Arya, have mercy on the poor macaroni," Christie said snapping her back to life.
She hissed out loud, then dropped her spoon noisily on the plate and pushed it aside.
Okay, what's going on? What's wrong with you? Josh asked and she hissed loudly again.
Arya, what's eating you up? You've being off all through today, did something happen? Christie asked yet no response from Arya.
She just sat still staring into space.
I need to tell you guys something," she finally spoke up after what felt like forever.
Ugh!! Finally, someone decides to speak up," Christie teased.
You both have been my best friend for the longest time and we practically share everything with each other, we never lie to each other and we don't keep secrets from each other...
Arya, what's going on? Am getting really confused," Christie quickly cut her off.
Am gonna tell you guys something, something I should probably keep a secret because it's a shameful thing, but I can't, and this thing am about to tell you might make you hate me or you might be disgusted or worst probably stop being friends with me, and it's really fine because i deserve it, but we always understand each other, so am hoping you will understand me and don't judge me, I can't hide it anymore," she spilled out, tears gathering in her eyes.
Okay, am getting scared, what's going on? Am tired of asking this question," Josh said sounding really impatient.
I need you guys to answer this few questions before I tell you what's going on," she said.
Okay," they quickly nodded urging her to go ahead.
For the past years that we've been close friends, have I ever for once done something illegal? She asked.
No," they replied.
Have I ever being immodest or immoral?
No," they replied.
Have I ever stayed out late or went clubbing or smoked?
Nope," they replied.
Have I ever had a boyfriend or slept with any man before?
What's with all this questions Arya, you have being nothing but a good girl since I got to know you, you clearly don't have any business with all the shits teenagers do for fun, you always obeyed the rules, you've never gone out of line, what exactly we need to know right now, is what's going on with you? You are scaring us," josh said.
Talk to us Arya, no one will judge you, I promise," Christie added holding her hand while Josh held the other.
Okay here goes my downfall, uhmm, I think am inlove with Ronald," she finally dropped the bomb.
Okay? What's wrong with that? Why are you making it sound like it's a crime? We know Ronald is a dangerous drug dealer, he's really rough and I don't know how you guys met for you to be falling this hard, but it's no big deal, I mean ...
Am not talking about the gangstar Ronald in grade 12, am talking about my brother Ronald," Arya cut her off.
What? Your brother? You are joking right? Christie asked hoping it's truly a prank.
Dead serious," Arya replied and Christie slowly let go of her hand, Josh did the same.
Yeah, I thought so," she mumbled and slowly bent her head.
Arya, this is really a lot to digest right now but am not condemning you, I mean you are human and certain things happen that you won't be able to control or stop yourself From doing, I perfectly understand you," Christie assured taking hold of her hand again.
But how did this happen? You never mentioned anything about it before, when did this attraction start? Josh asked staring intently at her.
I really don't know, but ever since we were little, I've always had a soft spot for him, and then we grew up and it's still there, I tried so much to convince myself that it is brother and sister kinda affection but it isn't it and I know it, am deeply attracted to him and I shouldn't be because it's incest, but then I can't seem to be in control of my emotions anymore," Arya stated as a drop of tear rolled down her cheeks.
Oh my God," Christie muttered in total bewilderment.
I've never mentioned it to you guys because it's shameful, i had to tell you guys now because it has been getting out of control this few months," she said, tears flowing freely from her eyes.
Arya please stop crying or am gonna cry too," Christie said using her thumb to clean her tears.
How about Ronald, have you told him about it? Josh asked.
No, but I think he's feeling more than I do, it's almost impossible for him to hide it even when our parents are present, guys this is really bad because it isn't just a normal attraction, this is deeply erotic, dark feelings, sexual cravings, I have wet dreams about him all the time, i get wet at little contact with him, I always imagineee how it feels to have him inside of me and.....
Ewww, stop, just stop already Arya, it's making me wanna puke right now no offence though, but this is really bad, it's incest, I can't believe this is happening near me, I only watch it in movies," Christie spat making an irritated face.
Ueah it's really bad," Josh added.
But you know what? I think you should get serious with Jeremy, maybe it might help get your mind off Ronald, or what do you think? Christie suggested.
I think that's a brilliant idea Christie,"Josh said.
I agree, it's really a great idea let's give it a try, Arya said with a not-so-bright smile.
Deep down, she doesn't want to get over the feelings she has for her brother but she has to because their love is never going to be accepted anywhere.
it's forbidden.
If only he is not her brother.