After talking to her about a month later, I realised that I was just so attracted and attached to her.i would always feel like messaging her and just want to find out more about her and I would follow her even out of school. But her mother was strict so I didn't follow her back to her house or went to her house for a sit. The way she treated her friends were so close. And me on the other hand, don't really treat my friends that close. I could felt the care and concern of her.
To be honest, everyone wants a friend that could hear them out when they are down or upset, a friend that wouldn't betray them , and they would also console you when you needed it. Overall, a friend that is willing to lent you their shoulder to lean on when you needed it.
And she managed to give me everything that I wanted from a friendship, and hence I started liking her. ALOT. Like I was willing to get out of my way just to help her. As long she needed the help and she is willing to ask me, I will help her to the best of my abilities. She is just like a human magnet. At first I thought we were inseparable, but I guess I was wrong.
She was an introvert by nature, she was quiet. She would keep everything to herself. Even if she liked a boy she wouldn't have the guts to tell him. She would just imagine and tell herself that she doesn't like him and just brush it off her mind.
Actually, I also didn't know why, but I just started to like her alot, I know it was wrong as I was a girl too. And nornally relationships work with opposite genders and not same gender. That's why I didn't have the guts to tell her. I dragged on for like a month without telling her. All the way until our end of year holiday,we were still texting. We would sometimes text all the way till midnight. However, at the end of the school holiday she suddenly sent a message that kinda just hurt my feelings. She said maybe we should just be normal friends and don't be best friends. She also said I didn't need to follow her or talk to her anymore.
This message to me was like...such a huge blow. It hurts me from all directions. I didn't know what to do. As I already was so dependent of her on giving me the care and concern that i always wanted.
Hence, I kinda just isolated myself from the world. I didn't wanted to talk to anyone anymore. And I felt like I wasn't myself. I used to be a happy go lucky person, I used to be forgiving. But yet after this. It just changed me. I have always been quite emotional and I can't control it well.but after that incident, I was even weaker than before. I don't know how many times I have actually cried over that incident. It just hurt me until it kinda felt numb instead . As I wasn't excepting that message from her.