I couldn't believe myself how fast time seemed to be passing it had already been two weeks of me here with my mate and it really did feel like it was just yesterday . Yes i had been keeping tabs of the days marking every passing day . Who won't though someone as unlucky as me who have only got two months with her mate whereas people live their whole life together with their mates .
He has been quite busy recently though some new work or something like that king related stuff which i actually have no idea about . I rearly see him these past days . And to be really truthful to myself , i am not in any kind of denial about this that i really miss him . Terribly if I might add. Although i do know that he do visit me every night by the smell of his cologne that still lingers in the air and the side of the bed that stays warm . Yes i finally did convince him to sleep by the other side next to me on the bed since the couch was not at all comfortable for his six point five frame .
It took some convincing but eventually he agreed to my demand yeah an Alpha sorry the King of the whole werewolf kingdom king of kings following my command . God how awesome it felt . It felt sooo satisfying like I'm some important being and my commands and demands aren't let down .
I didn't knew how much i had started leaning / depending upon him until the day i finally realise i had to leave . Leave this amazing place , these amazing people . Leave everyone . Leave Mari and ...... Lucas .
Since the morning i knew my eyes were glossy filled with tears trying to hide the red of it since I had cried myself to sleep last night . Kenna of course was howling inside my head wailing and weeping for the step we are about to take together . I did not went for either breakfast or lunch with the excuse of packing bags. By the evening at five was the time i had to leave the castle to be back to my pack , no one was coming to receive me since i had decided to not tell anyone about this decision of mine . I didn't had the face to . How could i when all this time mom Serena had told me trying to convince me how important having a Mate is and how mate bond is such a powerful attraction force .
As i stood up to wash my face throughly so as to not look so dull and gloomy the way i was feeling was when Lucas entered the room . Not looking like himself by any means .
His hair was tousled like they usually stayed but this time it looked rough like he had run his hands through them for more than a million times trying to tame it. His usual face still look that handsome but today he had a kind of expression he never held before his eyes held so many emotions and for the first time in forever he was not worrying to show the emotions he was feeling.
I give him a small smile casting my eyes downwards not wanting him to see what a mess I had become. " _Amore_ " his voice sounded raw with all the emotions swirling in his chocolate brown orbs and I couldn't help myself but stare at his disheveled form wanting nothing more than to embrace him in my arms . He cleared his throat asking me _" are you ready for the journey_ " I just nodded my head not trusting my voice with him just as I moved to grab my suitcase at the same time as him resulting in our hands brushing against each other the tingles shooted up my spine like no other times . It just felt something different this time like even our wolves were adamant of not leaving each other none of us retreating our hands from touching knowing we both needed it , needed this , needed each other . I closed my eyes wanting to feel him as much as possible. He was surreal . He was my everything , everything i ever needed or wanted. Why was i leaving him again ?, i didn't want to not anymore .
_" Why ? "_ his voice came out hollow and void and I could no longer compose myself any further breaking down in front of him my head hung low as i knelt down in front of him fat tears rolling down my face.
_" i have to , everything will be destroyed otherwise , you'll lose everything , you , your family , the whole kingdom , everything will be ruined . I a m not a good fit to be your mate._ " my voice cracked " _You are you're all i need amore , just tell me , do you need me too .Will you accept me ." " it is not like that Lucas , your people .. "_ by now he was embracing me in his arms kneeling next to me securing me in his warm and strong embrace and I couldn't help but breakdown more for all the comfort I was receiving being in his arms where I belong my heart belong to him and I realised that either I stay here or no where .
_" it's you , tell me what you want Amore " " I _ I Lucas I ... "_ I cried gulping the lump in my throat down to speak what I wanted I knew at this moment my brain was not rationalised and I was not thinking rationally and maybe just maybe I will regret this decision later but here at the moment in the heat of this moment I did not wanted to lie to him . My heart wanted him , I wanted him, I needed him and that was all I was going to tell him. _" I _ I want you , I need you Lucas , just you "_ his eyes sincere and a glint of hope was shining in them " _you sure_" I just nodded not trusting my voice anymore