What Elle wanted was for Sebastian to take her virginity, her first time. No matter the kind of marriage they end up having, there could be no dispute that he was now her husband, and no other man had the rights to bed her but him. She already knew about his kinky desires and that was why she had to admit that she was a bit nervous. But as she had told him, it was just for tonight. Just this once. She only needed to go through it one time. She could do it. After tonight, no more sex.
This decision was her way to protect herself. She had already experienced how easily this man could make her feel the intense carnal desire she has never felt before. He was dangerous for her in every way already, and she knew that if she was not careful, she would fall for him and to her demise without her even knowing how and when it happened. She saw the actions of sex with him as one of the most dangerous traps that she must avoid at all costs.
