The final turning point came on one of our days off. I was sitting by myself. I had communicated the results of the conversation with the Commander with those who understood. They had nodded. Most had agreed to remain until we were all ready. I was honoured by their faith in me. It was nearly over but I still had things to think about. I needed time.
I'd made my decision but there are always doubts. There are always regrets. I'm not the type who can walk forward without at least glancing back.
"It will be okay."
The voice startled me. I recognised it. Over the time of our captivity I had come to know everyone here. Including those in Arbriana's group. Draniroa was a Dranta. Xe was a neuter though. Unlike the W'ymic, Dranta don't have cycles. We have three genders. Male, female and neuter. Male and female give their genetic material to the neuter who then create the new life. In our society they are honoured because of that.
Draniroa was one of my faction. I didn't think xe was ready yet. Xe was one of the reasons I was staying. I hoped I could guide xem to the truth.
"It will be," I agreed with a smile.
Draniroa sat beside me. The Blacks had provided several benches around the open area. There were others sitting and chatting. But there was a small gap between us and the others. I wasn't concerned. Arbriana's group was on the far side. I wasn't sure what they were doing. I didn't care. I had other things on my mind.
"So a decision has been made?" Draniroa asked.
"A decision?"
Draniroa just gave me a look. It was one that said xe knew more than I thought. It was a good look but I wasn't moved. I knew xe didn't know anything yet. Xe had yet to think about what the consequences would be. It was a subtle thing.
"We all want what is best for our people," Draniroa told me.
"We do," I replied. It was inclusive. I didn't just meant the Dranta. I wanted what was best for the Alliance. It was going to be difficult. I was still a prisoner. I've always peaked behind me, but I've also never had the arrogance to believe that I alone can make such a large difference. I can help. I would help. I would contribute but it would have to be a group effort. We would have to work in concert. This wasn't one of those things that could be done any other way.
Draniroa sidled closer and leaned into me. It was provocative but also pleasing. "And you think surrender to the Blacks is the best for our people? You think killing the Bright Ones will bring us peace?" Xyr voice was a whisper.
I froze. The words were not what I should be hearing. Xe didn't know any of that information. Xe had one of the volunteers for service. Usually the Dranta don't let the neuters serve. They were too precious.
Then pain bloomed in my chest. I looked down. There was a knife impaling me. It was crude. Home made. I didn't recognise it. That really shouldn't be my concern.
"Traitor," xe hissed, but remained close. I realised the closeness would cover my wound. And Draniroa was a neuter, close to a male. There was nothing wrong with that. Had that been why I'd let xyr close? It had been a while since I'd last exchanged genes. Years in fact. I raised one arm. It was heavy but I managed to push at Draniroa.
"Arbriana sends her regards." The whisper followed me into darkness. I felt a passing regret that I wouldn't see the future but maybe that was for the best.
I wouldn't need to answer those doubts I still felt.
====
I awoke in the infirmary. I recognised it from the last time I woke up there. My chest hurt.
"Ah, so you've decided to live."
I knew the voice. It was the Base Commander.
"I think I'll think about it some more." My chest *really* hurt.
"No, you won't. You've lost too much time already."
"Oh?" It was my eloquent request to know how long I'd been out.
"About a week," she translated the single syllable.
"How?"
The Base Commander chuckled. "Even on your days off, we do monitor you."
That much was obvious.
"The medics here also know how to deal with wounded Dranta," she caught my real question.
"Oh yes," I murmured. They would. She was Dranta.
"I'm not sure if I should be impressed or disappointed though."
I could taste blood in my mouth. The medic had done enough for me to live but there was still some rough edges. I didn't understand the Commander's comment.
"You fell for one of the oldest tricks in the book," she continued. I had. Using the opposite sex to get close was something common to the Alliance. It's slightly more complex for Dranta and W'ymic but the principle remains. "On one hand, it proves you are male. On the other… well, I wasn't sure. You've never seemed interested."
It was my turn to look at her. Of course I wasn't interested in her. She was female. We could have fun but that wasn't going to happen. She was also the Base Commander for the Blacks and I was a prisoner. There were a lot of reasons.
"So you were?" I felt cheeky.
"No," she grinned at me. "But it's good to know you are norm-"
Anything further was lost as I coughed. Blood came up and a small bowl appeared. I spat into it. The motion had hurt.
"You are going to live," the Base Commander assured me. "But you are going to feel like shit for a while."
"Story of my life. Still, I should have known better."
"You should have. For now, you keep healing," she replied.
"After that?" I prompted.
"Military personnel don't usually get options, but you know as well as I do that you aren't military any more. Usually though we'd offer you some position in the civilian occupations."
I nodded again. That made sense. We might have agreed that the Alliance was wrong but we were still soldiers. I wondered what the hell I could do. I could fly. That was a skill at least.
"In your case, the War Commission want to offer you a position."
I gasped. The sharp motion made my chest hurt again. "Why?" I'd find out what the War Commission was later. All I really knew of the Blacks was that they were ruled by a Commonwealth. And they had individual governments for each nation. There had to be whole areas of complexity I knew nothing about.
"You care."
"Not that much," I objected.
She didn't argue but instead held out a collar. I knew what it meant. I swallowed blood again, but reached out. It felt heavy in my hands. I tinged the needles in the back with my fingers before I lifted it. It was cold against my skin. It settled. There was a sting of pain when the needles went in. I shivered.
There was no turning back.
"Welcome to the Commonwealth, Dranitor."
====
From there I healed. The Commander allowed several of those who were being shipped off to see me, before they left. It was good to confirm their safety. They were full of hope for the future, though it was from them that I learned Arbriana had been executed.
The Base Commander looked at me oddly when I asked about that. "She ordered it," she told me. It was explanation enough. I remembered her telling me about responsibility.
I didn't ask about Draniroa. Xyr position as a neuter would not have helped xyr with Black Justice. They probably executed xyr with the same squad as Arbriana.
Then it was time for me to leave. The Base Commander was escorting me to the shuttle. When leaving a planet, I try not to look back. It was a legacy of when I was flight support. But I realised this time, I didn't know one vitally important thing. "What is your name?" I asked her.
She grinned. I guess she remembered her earlier answers when I'd asked that. For a long moment I thought she wouldn't tell me. "Deborah."
I froze. That wasn't right. No Dranta had a name like that. How would I know she was Dranta? Then I realised that this was what should have happened. This was simply development, and advancement. This was the type of change I wanted for our people. "It was nice to meet you Deborah," I said the name carefully. It was the truth.
I wish everything I had to do from there had been as nice. The shuttle took me to Drana. The Blacks were landing forces. It was chaos. I wasn't involved in combat. I could never have kept up with them, not even with the training packet that had appeared in my comm one morning. I never looked at the sender but I knew who it was. Pickering did good work.
The battle didn't take as long as it should have. Our homeworld shouldn't have fallen so quickly but I knew our forces were demoralised before the ground battle even began. Drana is a core world for the Alliance. A homeworld of one of the species. The Bright Ones abandoned it. The token forces they left were not enough. The Dranta there knew that. The Humans knew that. They had called for surrender before they attacked.
The call wasn't answered. The influence of the Bright Ones was too strong then. I was assured it would fade. I hoped it faded quickly. I wasn't called to go down until everyone was subdued. I could see large areas aflame but, if I was honest, they were smaller than they could have been. The Blacks had been careful. No doubt it would take a while for others to acknowledge that.
I went to the shuttle bay. There were other shuttles there. They were ready to launch. Some were already in the air. I was surprised at that. I'd never seen ships like this. They weren't the universal black I'd seen before. These were painted white. They had a red cross emblazoned on them. Some had green crosses. I asked why. The soldier shrugged. I hadn't known Kishne couldn't see red. The Blacks did. Then I asked what the ships were, why they were different.
The answer confirmed what I had come to know. The Blacks do care.
---
That is how I joined the Commonwealth. It's why I stand before you, the leaders of Drana, proud of this collar around my neck, proud of what it represents. The Humans have a history here. They say the collars represent slavery. For us, it represents freedom! Freedom from the Bright Ones.
I hope one day to remove it. But that day depends on the Bright Ones. They may lay down their arms. They may lead the Alliance to peace. The door is open. The will is there but they have to accept that they are one race amongst equals.
And we all know, they won't do that. I hope they can learn. I suspect we will be at Cyndya before they do. I suspect it will be only the younger ones that can. But the Commonwealth doesn't know for sure. It is willing to try.
For now, you just see the ruins of Drana. I see the hope. I see my people working to rebuilt. Drana has been freed. The Bright Ones were driven away. We are ready to grow, to develop. We are ready to learn. We have always been ready to learn. But what have we learned since the Bright One's came. We took FTL. We did not learn it. We have developed nothing more.
Why not? Why have we not been allowed to grow? You, who lead us, would know better. You, who lead us, have been the ones they have held back. Why?
Because they would not let us. Because they were afraid. Of course, they never said that. You know that better than I ever will. It was always "for the good of the Alliance". But the good of the Alliance never considered the good of the Dranta. We should consider our neighbours. We shouldn't wipe them out because we can. But we should also consider what is good for our peoples. I want that, too. I want us to develop further.
I want us to become the Bright Ones. One day. I will not see that day. You will not see the day. When that day comes, it will be because we have followed in the footsteps of those who went before us.
The Humans. The ones you call Enemy. The ones you call Black. They will lead the way. They say they aren't psychic. They say they haven't evolved that way. Maybe not. Maybe they are. Maybe the path is different for us all. But I say now that we can no longer allow the path to be hidden from us.
We must look forward. We must look beyond. We must regain the people that we were before the Bright Ones. It will be up to you to lead us. I can encourage. I can urge, and I will but I am the voice of our people. You are our leaders. You must lead. But you must be free of the Bright Ones' taint. No more can we be dependent on their lies. You must see this collar for what it truly is.
Only together can we lead each other. Only together can we truly advance.
For now, we must rebuild. We must regain what has been lost, and we must look to bring down the Alliance. Only once it is gone, only once all our peoples are free, can we move on.
---