I wonder how many times in this lifetime I would have to wake up to the smell of disinfectant, the sound of beeping monitors, and a drip in my hand. I think it's been six times now, and four times out of those six times were caused by my Ex-mate. It's funny how the people you love are the ones who cause you more danger.
"Used to love." I heard Rieka groan in my head and I smiled.
"Either way, I hate it here and the feeling of waking up here every now and then is getting old." I grumbled in return as I sat up on my bed trying to actually remember what happened.
I fought until I fainted. I remembered and sighed.
"Rieka is there no way to use my blood rage continually without getting exhausted and fainting? It is really embarrassing how I suddenly fainted in the midst of all those people. What if I was in the midst of enemies?" I complained.
"Stop complaining Silveen, you just started your training, you are not even strong enough. How can you complain about fainting? Why don't you focus on strengthening yourself instead of depending on your blood rage to help you out of every situation." Rieka scolded to my surprise.
"Where is this coming from?"
"From me! you almost got me killed because you were busy cheating in the fight."
"I wasn't cheating, I only made use of the abilities at my disposal. It's not like Eric and Layla didn't cheat when they tried to kill me many months ago." I retorted angrily.
I can't believe she accused me of cheating. I was the reason we didn't get beaten up.
"Yes and when you fight them in the future depending on only your blood rage, you would end up fainting out of exhaustion in the middle of the fight and we would get killed." she deadpanned and I went silent.
The fact that she watched the whole thing play out even though it felt like she wasn't there was tiring
"I was scared okay? I thought I lost you." I excused myself but she humped in annoyance and I felt guilty.
"I'm sorry." I said silently.
I didn't really know how much that portion could hurt her, I kept on drinking to defy Ramon and show superiority in the ring, show the strength of an Austan wolf.
"The juice had to be flushed out of your system to save me." she said calmly and my heart skipped a beat and my eyes widened.
I had almost killed… I had almost killed Rieka while I was trying to get strong enough to protect us from the world, I had almost killed her? That's it,
"I'm not taking that portion again." I stated.
"Yes, you are."
"What?"
"How are you weaker than those who fight and master the ability to keep their mind calm when they use the silver portion? You are going to keep on using it and fighting until you are strong enough. No blood rage this time."
"But..." I began but was cut off
"No buts Silveen, we're leaving no stone unturned in your training. We have responsibilities and I am not weaker than those wolves, neither are we. Start depending on your inner strength." Rieka lectured and it seemed as if I hadn't gone through a month of vigorous training under her supervision earlier.
Why was she being strict? What's with the responsibility thing by the way? The only responsibility I have is killing Layla in front of Eric, then killing him too. I thought angrily. I knew Rieka caught a gleam of my thought but she ignored me.
My attention was drawn to the door that suddenly opened and Adela walked in. her eyes widened with pleasant surprise when she saw me.
"Silveen! Thank the goddess you are alive." She said and I only nodded smiling a little. I was getting used to the happiness she showed every time she found I was still awake.
It felt nice to know that at least someone wanted you alive.
She sat beside me immediately and placed her palm over my forehead and I had the urge to move away but I didn't, it also felt so nice to have someone act like my mother.
I wonder what she was doing now, my mother I mean. I wonder if she missed me. Did she even know that I had gone missing from the pack she and her mate sent me to? Maybe when all this was over, I would go look for her, and find out who my real father was because I was sure Gamma Arnold wasn't him. He wasn't an Austan wolf and neither was she.
"How do you feel?" Adela asked me.
"Fine." I said with a shrug.
"And your wolf? How is she?" Adela asked again and I was about to say fine when Rieka responded.
"Ask her who Tiana is." She said out of the blue.
Tiana? Who was that? I wondered as I looked at Adela, I have never heard the name before.
"Just ask her?" Rieka prodded again and I looked at Adela, who was waiting for my reply.
"What is it? You still can't feel her?" Adela asked me with a look of concern.
"Who is Tiana?" I asked suddenly and she looked at me shocked.
It was obvious, she knew who that was, and so did Rieka but why didn't I? I have never heard of it before but how did Rieka know and I didn't?
"Rieka, did you take over my body at some point when I was unconscious?"
"Stop asking silly questions Silveen and ask her again."
I frowned and turned to the torn Adela who didn't know what to say.
"Tell me who Tiana is." I asked firmly this time.
"She's your mother." Adela said calmly.
"What!" I exclaimed surprised at first then I laughed, "What are you talking about, my mother is Lupe and she doesn't have a second name called Tiana." I explained and Adela looked confused.
"Lupe? Who is Lupe? Is she the woman the witches gave you to?" she asked in innocence and blood rushed into my head.
"The witches..... What are you talking about? I didn't know the witches until like seven months ago? How do you know the witches?"
Questions spiraled out of my mouth as the wall of reasoning in my head collapsed. What was going on?
"Rieka, what is going on?" I asked confused.
"Why don't you ask her? She knows what happened and how you ended up as the daughter of the Gamma of Estradol more than any other person." Rieka said seriously.
Why do I feel like Rieka also knew about this? How did she know? What did i miss?
"It isn't in my place to tell you this story, Silveen, that is the witches' job or probably your mother's." she said solemnly again.
"Tell me." I said and she sighed.
"You aren't the daughter of those foster parents, Lupe or whatever you call her. You are the daughter of Tiana and Adriel, the alpha of the Austan pack." she declared and I stared at her with my mouth wide open.
Austan pack's alpha? My parents? I had a different parent? The alpha..... Wait, the alpha of the Austan pack is dead. Wasn't he?
I looked at her again, "Which of their alphas? The dead one?" I asked again and her eyes softened as it glittered, and she nodded.
I gasped and tears filled my eyes.
"Your mother was in labor when a war broke out, she gave birth to you and the only way to keep you safe was to send you away with the witches that's why you ended up with foster parents." Adela quickly explained.
So the alpha was dead? My biological father was dead? What about the Luna, Tiana is she alive?
"What about Tiana, is she.....?" the words stuck in my throat.
Somehow, being an orphan didn't seat well with me. My foster parents were terrible but it felt okay to have parents somewhere.
No wonder, no wonder they never cared, no wonder they were curious those nights ago when I was supposed to shift.
They didn't even know about me. Those witches, I have to find them. I have to know what happened to my parents.
No, I know what happened to my father, the alpha of Kirjan killed him. Eric's dad killed him.