"oooo" i felt my neck pain. it' beenin' one and a half hours. my tears became flow eyes to ears tops and started hide in hair. may it seem like a tears style. blacky night no-one could see that too. it's a freaky out. nd i'm look like freak out again,
my hand look at packet of my habit and start and start stare at sky. it seems hard to see a single star. i used to stay thereafter hours staring at...
its been an one of my habits since 5y to stay awake at late night, smoke cigarettes, talk rude, live alone and alcoholic. that a effort love. love make me bad boy a bad liar..
why she left if she be together. why she ignore if she want me, and why she hate if she love me...
it that matter after break, i still think about it how and why she do that?
whatever i sees a small excuse for that "it been a time-pass for me thinking of this stuff.
a cloudy night make inner war with me, "is that a night of my comfort that i suppose?"
voice comes "no, it may be or not"
then why i have to wait too much for see the stars and moon...
no voice around me, no support from that night too...a day became lonely may i be lonely bt one think i never feel that that why i used to stay here no matter how long it be...
this place chilled me after break' when i came for cry, bt became a philosopher of inner war's here.
no, no matter much more than u, and withtimes u know that, u can be happy live without those whom u think u can't do without them..
since long i make my day and night same daylight can't see me and night that i want to stay late or saying that was my habit to stay late of night's,
slowly i losing around my things what i gotta, and i'm careless about i like to stay same like that alldays of my life and started to lived too. and slowly....
dark moon goes out cloudy night....
i trying to feed me junk alot. and i felt i being like junk beardy faced, dark circles, pimples,
skinny, disturbed...i became uglier more
that one is only a night that make me cool or silent inside...
one day another day another day keep going
there is no changes before from after and after from before the days going one without changes in life style hygienic a bit.
'in more, i be worst, more, i did worse..
I felt same, in every full-moon at every time i look. at my mind now there's now suffocation in. may be i'll be out of my mind where and when i can't came and don't thought at it. it be the familiarize at my mind. i want to lay same which i did before, i used to sense same what i past time make before. all-over that nice that make me hurt of joy in my abuse mind. and i felt better much. than at my newbies day here.
smtimes, i think my self a R.A.P. boys, who need the same things to heal, what he began to suffer from. alike i suffer the day what i used to be sit here and i have to make abuse myself to heal like what make my mind hurt.