Chereads / Saving My Decoy Wifey / Chapter 1 - Dude, Necromancy is for DEAD people

Saving My Decoy Wifey

Dungeon_Sista95
  • --
    chs / week
  • --
    NOT RATINGS
  • 1.8k
    Views
Synopsis

Chapter 1 - Dude, Necromancy is for DEAD people

"How many times do I have to tell you this ?! Huh ?" Zeke shakes his head left and right while curling his lips as he tosses out a half withered white daisy with disgust, "Necromancy, is for FINDING DEAD PEOPLE, it is DEAD PEOPLE MAGIC, you do understand that even if Green was the slightest bit alive she won't show up on my DEAD PEOPLE cauldron radar! You fool !"

"It doesn't hurt to at least try ok ?! I HAD to ! She did this for ME and MY STUPID FAMILY and I can't just abandon her. I NEED to find her !" PJ panicks, he stands up from a fetus position on the floor, walks past Zeke and carefully picks up the white daisy he tossed out earlier, quickly dusts it off and puts it back in his linen waist pouch with his initials and some sickly sweet words embroidered on, which was made and gifted by Green for "knick knacks and wifey things".

"PJ

My peanut jelly no butter

Prince Jade

G"

PJ holds up the waist pouch to his face and instantly buried his nose into it while taking a deep breath to soak up all Green's scent that still remains on the fabrics. She smells like chocolate 90% of the time because besides being a chocolate connoisseur, she is also a talented chocolate maker who has won the hearts of some the most picky children of the Vorumia Island Kingdom.

"Just admit you fucking caught feelings that's why we are in this mess in the first place! Or else you wouldn't have cared about a girl you don't at least want to fuck!" Zeke yells, slams his hands on the already cracked dark oak plank wood tool shelves in his "dead people magic" shed.

"If we are REALLY doing this, fucker, this was YOUR world to begin with ! " PJ could feel the veins on his bruised neck popping out, his face is turning cherry red as he points angrily at Zeke.

"Last time I checked I was PLAYING D&D at your broken plastic black table then YOU chanted something, next thing you know we are fucking here, in this world, that YOU, Mr.Genius, created in your fucking head." PJ frustratingly waves his injured arm at Zeke pointing at random corners of the shed trying to make his point. It is an understatement to say that PJ is really not having a good time.

Zeke lowers his head and lets out a long sigh, his dark long locks drip down on his shoulder as if someone spilled ink on his back, which is a stark contrast to PJ's ensembles. PJ's hair is naturally blonde, curly and wild yet some of his exes in real life have told him that he has the best beach waves without even trying. On the island of Vorumia, PJ's soft features often give him advantages as the enemies usually let their guard down seeing a 6ft tall guy with a baby face in rich people clothes. Like, what can this guy do? He probably doesn't even know how to hold a kitchen knife.

"And THANKS for making ME the prince! " PJ mockingly put both of his index fingers on each side of his cheeks, "I'm clearly not cut out for that, starting to think maybe all those books and shows about the royals are lying pieces of shits."

"Wow I should get you a round of applause cuz you finally figured it out? Bravo, rich kid. Whatever, We gotta go, no time to waste!" Zeke starts frantically packing all his necromancy supplies into his cognac leather travel sack. The potion bottles clinks in the sack with the drops of random herbs, jars full of preseved animal organs and chump changes for the road.

Maybe it's the extreme fatigue or the fever caused by his wounds getting infected, to PJ's surprise, he doesn't mind the clanking noise coming from Zeke tidying up at all. Leaning against the tool shelves, PJ tries to preserve some of his energy for the long journeys ahead, he puts his right hand on the tightly wrapped wound left by the Tiefling bandits on his left bicep. The gauze was Green's favorite waist ribbon, it was cream white with wild coco plant sewn on, now it's saturated with blood.

PJ stares at the blood-stained gauze for a minute and promptly zones out.

"Don't die on me ok! I'll be fine but YOU have to go! I'll find you !! I can't die before I make you that nom nom chocolate! " Green desperately tries to get her waist band undone while putting pressure on PJ's deep cut on the left arm that's oozing blood.

"Hey ..heyy..I uh ..have something to tell you, before it gets too late." PJ musters all his strength as Green loops the ribbon as tight as she could with no help from magic around PJ's slit-opened arm.

"Ew this better not be that I love you bullshit. I love you too ok AS A HOMIE and there's no such thing as 'before it gets too late', you'll live and we'll have PLEEENTY of time to play house and I might not even wanna play it with YOU at that time. I think the half-orc that lives down the road from you is awful.. cute. Haha!" Green just rambles on, looking away as her voice breaks a little at the end, it's definitely the thick grey smoke in the Palace messing with her vocal cord, she thought. She could never admit that she cares for someone like PJ, not in this world and DEFINITELY NOT in the real world.

"No no listen, just listen to me, just this once, I know I'm a total piece of shit" PJ took a deep labored breath through the pain, "the chocolate I bought from you the first time I saw you at the farmers market by campus, was...for... YOU."

~~To Be Continued~~