ah
Finally. The only way to stop this nightmare.
Right in front of my eyes. The only tool that can make me feel the sensation of being blown up right in my head.
I walked over and picked up the shotgun and checked the rounds in the casing.
2 rounds. More than enough. It might be a little messy but the result is definitely satisfactory.
I stare at the shotgun blankly. I go and sit on the couch and put the shotgun in my mouth.
Take a slow breath.
Remember all the memories with my daughter, flowing every second.
Take a deep breath, my daughter I will catch up with you.
Taking a quick breath I begin to slowly pull the trigger of this shotgun.
[Your wish has been granted. A memento of your daughter is placed on your desk]
I stopped, in a little less time my head will be a decoration of this sofa.
Damn system, you're preventing me from catching up with my daughter, you bastard system. well shit.
[Your wish has been granted. A pear has been placed on your desk]
Are you kidding me? You've made me despair now you're giving me this pear.
I pointed my middle finger at System, and cursed it.
I opened my daughter's keepsake box.
It contained my daughter's letters to me, her little doodles, and what made me sad were the three things in this box.
A necklace that is dark black in color but when lit by light, it shows a star motif like a galaxy. It's beautiful in my opinion.
then the second item is a picture of me with her, I admit I've never taken a picture with her, but in this photo it's like I asked a professional photographer to take a picture of us.
I held rithya with my left hand. smiling happily with me in her favorite clothes.
I cried looking at the photo, pleasure sadness happiness emptiness mixed my emotions at this time.
and the last is a letter containing
'Dear daddy
I am grateful that I met you, my days are full of warmth and happiness that I get while being with you. I am happy every time you cook food, tell stories, play with me. I don't feel sad at all. I am happy with you dad. I am always by your side.
'Daddy I love you'
The end of the letter made my soul calm and relieved.
I can get rid of the boulder in my heart but not in my mind.
I put my rifle on the table and took out the bullets, I wrote down
'if things doesn't go your way, use this'
Okay, now what. I put on my daughter's necklace and tried to wake up from my depression.
Time to fix the atmosphere of my apartment.
.
.
After cleaning and tidying up all the troublesome things and starting to slowly get out of my depression.
I try to start a new day by trying to think how this system works. Maybe I can exploit this system.
The system can activate with the condition that is my emotions, if my emotions are more dominant one than the other.
Sometimes the system also gives me something without a specific trigger.
Well, at least the rough outline of my system is understandable, now what?
.
.
.
I'm out of ideas now what to do. Enjoying a quiet life in society is impossible.
Society makes you work for them, on the other hand society doesn't help you at all.
Everyone is for themselves, but only a select few people will care about you on some basis.
Then what do I want to do now to fill my quiet life.
Just think about it tomorrow, I'm tired.